I dont mean it that way
Its not a cliche
To say
Dont fall in love with me
This isnt for my benefit
A safety net
To avoid the complications
Of love
No
Just dont fall in love with me
Not because its wrong
Or because its bad
But because loving me
Is the worse thing
Anyone who has loved me
Has ever done
Please my love
Dont let me be your regret
Oct 10, 2020
Oct 10, 2020 at 3:37 AM UTC
Like a cold
Making me sick
Miserable
Unable to breathe
Making my head foggy
Annoying
Or maybe its worse
Like a deadly virus
Body sweating
Stomach curdling
Emptying its contents
Over and over
Until the taste of bile
Stay permanently
Im my mouth
But no
You
You're a cancer
Killing me slowly
Leaving subtle symptoms
Barely there
Until suddenly its all about you
All about the lies you tell
The harm you've done
And by the time you start
Making big waves
Making big impacts
Its too late
The damage is done
And the only cure is to endure
A pain worse than you
To **** myself willingly
Poison myself
In the hopes that you drown in it too
I had hoped you were just a cold
Jul 24, 2017
Jul 24, 2017 at 1:13 PM UTC
You should suffer
Like you made me suffer
And it's just so unfair
That you can pick yourself up
Like nothing
And continue
I guess I now know
Like I knew with that stupid boy
Like I knew with the other fool
They didn't really love me
You didn't really love me
You just wanted some sort of petty revenge
To make me suffer
I wasnt with you
I suffered
I was with you
I suffered
I still suffer
You took away my trust
My free will
Gave me a million insecurities
That no one should have to deal with
And now
You get to move on?
You get to love again?
You dont deserve it
I was so confused
I thought I was jealous
I thought I had regrets
But I don't
You ****** me up so bad I couldn't tell what I was feeling until I thought
Hours
Online
Stalking like a mad woman
Trying to find an explanation
And then I found it
I was mad about the injustice of it all
I get to be broken
And you get to walk away
Without any blood on your hands
Dec 22, 2016
Dec 22, 2016 at 12:28 AM UTC
I miss your ******* face
Yes your ******* face
I can almost hear you
Arguing semantics
On how one can miss
A ******* face
Like how its possible
For one to shut a ******* face
Yeah
Ouch
I still miss your ******* face
And your brown eyes
And your bright smile
Your lanky walk
The way you talk
You fingers dancing along a guitar
Your stomach gurgles
Your ticklish spots
I miss them all
Even when you'd argue semantics
Or paused a movie to ask who shot first
Forced a cartoon on me
Left me hanging
I see why you did though
And I appreciate it
I love you for it
But I still miss you
I needed you
But its alright
I've always managed on my own
Fighting tooth and nail
But I manage
And I want to thank you
Because I know you had something to do with it
Leading me to him
And yes I know
It's arguing semantics on if you really did or not
But you know me
I don't really care about arguing semantics
Dec 21, 2016
Dec 21, 2016 at 3:22 AM UTC
Heart breaking
Gut wrenching
Feels almost
Like drowning
But instead of choking
On water
You choke
On despair
What else is there
Why else is there
Nothing to be done
Nothing to be heard
Everything falls
On deaf ears
On ignorance
From the truth
You could never handle
My despair
You cannot handle
The storm inside of me
A fool tries
To calm the storm
A wise man
Revels in it
For it's beautiful
And wonderous
That feeling
There
I cherish it
For weak men
Fear the storm
My man
Dances with it
Dec 21, 2016
Dec 21, 2016 at 2:53 AM UTC
To love someone
Is a choice
I have learned this the hard way
Screaming
Crying
Asking why did this have to happen to me?
It's a thing I brought on myself
Love
And when you read that word
Read it with disdain
Love is a choice
So is hate
But there is no in between with me
So I chose
I choose to hate you
With everything I have
Because if I don't?
I'll love you until it kills me.
Nov 17, 2015
Nov 17, 2015 at 1:00 AM UTC
I hate the way things turned out
That your mere presence
Makes me angry
Because I'm right here
And I'm being ignored
And I hate that you ******* look at me
When you think I don't know
Or do I know
Because I hate this feeling
That everything is in my head
And that you never cared
Because you accused me of not caring
But it makes me angry
And once I realize I'm consumed by hate
I get sad
And lonely
Even in a room full of people
I hate that the person in my dreams
Is not the person in my reality
Because now I know
That everybody lies.
Feb 21, 2015
Feb 21, 2015 at 5:23 PM UTC
Of all the things I have observed
I know how she lives her life
She has no regrets
Even when she made mistakes
She never regrets them
Because it's an action
Because she knows that regret
Will hurt not just her
But others
So trust in her
When she said
You will never be her regret
The happiness
However fleeting
She cherishes
You made her happy
You made her feel alive
It wasn't the secrecy
Or even the physical aspect
That made her feel
It was you
And as short as it lasted
As short as the moment it took
To make her feel like she messed up
She doesn't regret it
She never regrets loving someone
She only regrets not saying it
Feb 17, 2015
Feb 17, 2015 at 6:52 AM UTC
Maybe it was the fact that I laughed
But if I loved every man who made me laugh
I'd be called 'easy'
But not every man made me laugh like you did
No man has ever made me laugh like you did
Like nothing mattered in the world
But you and me
And the fact that you were falling asleep
Denying it
But still falling
Falling as fast asleep
As I was falling fast in love
And the fact that I was supposed to be
On your couch
Not in your bed
But trusting that you weren't that guy
You weren't
But you were so warm
And nothing mattered
Not classes
Not people
Not the cool breeze outside
Or even the repercussions
The morning would bring
Just you and me
At 3 am
When I fell in love with you
Feb 12, 2015
Feb 12, 2015 at 9:25 PM UTC
If I have to write a poem
About how much you ******* ****
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea
Feb 9, 2015
Feb 9, 2015 at 10:14 AM UTC