Here we are
Like always
Dog yelping
in the other room
I try to explain to you
My pain is like yours
Just fragmented
Amongst your own ghost
Don’t you see it?
The bruises of whiskey
The long sighs of relief
When you come home clean
Clean
Clean
Isn’t that a funny word?
I wait so long to hear it.
And then you whisper -
The essence of it.
It floats within me
For a fragment of time
Even if
I admit
It’s now on its’ ninth life,
Each time I beg
That your life
Still has truth
And then it goes out
The meaning of it all
And you laugh
Because isn’t joy
Just the ignorance of pain?
I’m crying
There’s tears in the living room now
And on the sofa where you spoke your first sound
I’m trying
To contain the little of my remains
But how do you die when you’re still living?
You look at me now
Those same eyes I saw
When you were four
Four and trying to show me
How your spaceship made of sand
Will take us far -
Take us to the moon
Take us there
And back
I’m standing in your room
And I’m trying
To figure out how I got us here
To figure out how to get us back
Do bottle tops shimmer like sand?
Oct 15, 2020
Oct 15, 2020 at 11:14 PM UTC
did we have better plans?
was the world ours?
was it going to be
something we could be?
and with that wish -
with that breath -
with that hold on the world -
it was ours
it was really yours
but with that
maybe it was mine
too
Oct 4, 2020
Oct 4, 2020 at 12:10 AM UTC
here we are
in this night
and in the next
- if we're lucky -
and we are alone
as always
wishing to be
something
that we are not
complicated
complicate
complications
and then the new
day
starts
around the world
we kiss
we give
we live
can we please
swear
that this is more
because
for me
this means more
complicated, i swear
Oct 3, 2020
Oct 3, 2020 at 11:58 PM UTC
take me away, my dear
to whichever land you call your own
where the strangers don't play alone
take me away, my love
to those in this world who don't know fear
to those who listen to what they can hear
take me.
take me to the edges of this earth
to the depths of the souls
to the laughter and the tears and
to all that is known
I hear us in the dark
when the rain falls on the dirt
it is clear now
there are secrets that both haunt and love our hearts.
Dec 16, 2018
Dec 16, 2018 at 1:16 PM UTC
There are all these secrets
shared among full rooms
and we are in one of them
quietly awaiting our own hearts.
You were young when I met you.
Full of breath
but now age comes fast
and the air in your lungs is less than half.
I loved you most in the morning
when the sun was rising and new
but I needed you more in the darkness
when all I knew I loved
faded with the time of day.
Here we are in the middle of it all.
And you lean into my heart
to whisper in my ear
"I love you most, my dear."
Feb 10, 2018
Feb 10, 2018 at 11:36 AM UTC
Follow your footsteps and
Fall asleep to your song and
Free from the tears and
Fasten the love and
and
and
and
Apr 25, 2017
Apr 25, 2017 at 10:23 AM UTC
there was this time
when I no longer cried
and i tried
to remember the last fight.
but you stole it
took it all
left nothing but my name.
it was just a name
burned at the corners
letters missing from your lungs
and i stood there in the sun
wishing for the cliche
of pouring rain
but you stole the moon
and the night
left me with the burning rays
and the ability to see
everything that used to be
and everything that is
Oct 8, 2016
Oct 8, 2016 at 3:17 AM UTC
so we wait now
resting our shoulders on hotel pillowcases
water dripping slowly from a shower head
you read a book about echoed mountains
and I wait because I love you.
I keep coming back to a moment
something about you in tears
crying over a fight with Dad
and I keep picturing you like that.
You're quiet now
waiting to be lost again
waiting to be in a moment without us
there is a pain you have
that no one can compete with.
And I remember now
why I saw you in tears
I can't be enough
and I'm sorry.
Jun 26, 2016
Jun 26, 2016 at 12:46 PM UTC
There’s an emptiness today
One covered with fall leaves and broken trees
Window half open
Inviting small pellets of breeze to drift into the room
Chapstick broken in the bottom drawer of the desk
Those days, back when I was a kid
Crawling around in the playground outside
Father putting white blocks of sunscreen
On the forehead of my face
Didn’t even know what existed yet
This is nostalgia, isn’t it?
Or maybe it’s a what if.
Jun 1, 2016
Jun 1, 2016 at 5:55 PM UTC
run around the world
and you get lost and dizzy.
wait for it to turn
and you become nothing but impatient.
fight the way it laughs
and you have every type of ending.
just be
and you have nothing but a story
Apr 3, 2016
Apr 3, 2016 at 11:48 AM UTC