I want to scream
in the middle of the street
masks stomped under my feet
I want to feel free
not trapped under a roof
that takes pleasure in my dark feelings
I want to touch and hug and
kiss and love and go back
to what it all once was
But every time I feel like breaking
every time my legs start shaking to
RUN
RUN AND BE FREE
I remember her smile and her kind eyes
her wrinkled hands gently stroking my hand
she doesn't know who I am
but she knows I'm family
and that is enough
That is enough
May 16, 2020
May 16, 2020 at 5:04 PM UTC
In our youth
When we scraped our knees and elbows
Raw and red
We would run to our mothers
Frightened of the first taste of the attribute
That would haunt us like a shadow admist
Our grown up lives
Into the medicine cabinet she would reach
Placing soothing kisses over
our barely present wounds
Placing soft sticky Band-Aids on our scraped up limbs
It was a quick fix
Comfort and safety wrapped up into one
Paper packaged medicinal amenity
And each Band-Aid would make us yearn for more
An addiction it became so quickly
We became oversensitive to pain
One sharp tag and we went fumbling for the box
A peeling piece of skin
and the world was topsy turvy
Until it was covered and forgotten
When we finally felt
Real and jarring pain
The wrappers surrounded us
A mountain of useless snow
And all the Band-Aids would unstick
From the amount of blood seeping out of
Dagger cuts and bullet holes
And we go back to our youth
And remember when life was sweet like an August peach
And pain was something talked of movies and ghost stories
And we cry our salty tears
Begging to go back when a band aid could fix everything
And we wonder
When that power left
And this despair finally set in
The band aids unstick
And fall to the ground
Like we once did
In our youth
When we scraped our knees and elbows
Raw and red
Mar 31, 2019
Mar 31, 2019 at 4:39 PM UTC
softly
softly
the air weeps
softly
softly
the ground mourns
softly
softly
the stars cry aloud
softly
softly
the sea wails
softly
softly
they have flown into the night
softly
softly
they have found a new home
softly
softly
those dreams have vanished
softly
softly
my heart falls asunder
softly
softly
I am pitied
softly
softly
this heartache comes
softly
softly
I am undone
Nov 28, 2018
Nov 28, 2018 at 7:59 PM UTC
Mommy said there was no such thing
as the Monster
When I was scared
she tucked me in
and kissed my cheek
and told me
"it's all just a nightmare"
But some days
I see the marks
the monster left her
Purple and Blue
Yellow and Black
the colors of the saddest rainbow
Sometimes at night, the monster gets her
and in the morning
she makes splashes
in her coffee
Mommy protects me
The monster never comes
to get me
But one day
Mommy was on the ground
and she didn't move
and the monster stood over her
a ****** knife in his hand
glinting like his silver
wedding band
Sep 8, 2018
Sep 8, 2018 at 8:21 PM UTC
I think I saw you
last night
Waiting at the edge of the crosswalk
talking on the phone
I blinked
and you were gone
A glitch in the universe
I suppose
But this morning
I saw you again
On the edge of my lawn
looking at my window
I threw it open
but you weren't there
I closed it
and turn around
I saw you there
in my room
your hand gently
touching my face
You smell
so distinct
A smile stretched
across your face
I missed you
you said
You've been doing well
you said
I breathed
and you were gone
Back to where ever it was
that souls go
I want to say
Heaven
But you left
so suddenly
you couldn't
let go
and I
still can't
let go
Aug 19, 2018
Aug 19, 2018 at 12:02 AM UTC
There's a special feeling only a few of us get to feel
In those hours when it's nighttime, but day
We feel like we're the only people in the world
Like the universe created it just for us
We're the rulers of a quiet and eerie world
so different from the harsh life of day
It's in those moments we find ourselves wandering
Waiting and wondering
Listening and imagining
something that's out of our grasp
or not yet in our lives
It's only for a brief moment we get to feel that
before sleep comes for us
and the last thing we think
before we drift off into the oasis of bliss
"what will today bring?"
Aug 18, 2018
Aug 18, 2018 at 11:31 PM UTC
There must be something in the water
that gives me those tingles
that makes my ears ring
when I hear you laugh
There must be something in the wine
that makes me float
and feel all giddy
when you tuck my hair behind my ear
There must be something in the flowers
that you gave me on Valentine's
that makes my eyes water
and my heart thump against my ribs
There must be something in the air
that makes it so hard to breathe
when I see you
There must be something in my eyes
that trick me into thinking
you're kissing someone else
There must be something in my brain
that made me so oblivious
to the things you were doing
There must be something in my heart
that makes it break into a million pieces
There must be something
that made me think
you loved me
Aug 18, 2018
Aug 18, 2018 at 9:11 PM UTC
When you're falling asleep
in a place that's far from home
I'll be in the air you breathe
A soft whisper
against the loud voice of loneliness
When you're watching the seasons pass
I will be in the leaves that grow and fall
the rain that comes to wash your sorrows away
When you carry your dreams into the harsh future of tomorrow
I will help with the burden
until there is a steady place on which they can rest
When those salty tears run down your face
I will wipe them away with a gentle wind
and a kiss on a salty breeze
I am everywhere
in the water
in the air
in the clouds
in the sky
in your heart
And though I cannot walk the harrowing road of life with you anymore
I will take your hand
and guide you to a tomorrow I never got to see
And when your time comes to meet me at the end of the road
I will smile and embrace you
I will whisper to you
"You were never alone"
Aug 18, 2018
Aug 18, 2018 at 9:05 PM UTC
Tuck that piece of hair back
yes that's better
go pierce your ears
yes that's better
go get your teeth whitened
yes that's better
go lose 25 pounds
yes that's better
now lose another 50
yes that's better
go get some lip injections
yes that's better
go get breast implants
yes that's better
go starve yourself
yes that's better
just stopping being yourself
yes that's better
but its still far from
perfect
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 4:46 PM UTC
The wind is a friend of mine
She blew me in from the desert
to a picturesque coastal town
She came around often
bring rain and snow and life
in big booming clouds
But she hasn't been here in a while
It's taking so much energy to smile
The air is so stale, I can hardly breathe
The ground is crumbling so I fall to my knees
The sun's harsh heat is a warning to me
that though I can run
I will never be free
When I'm happy, I'm lying
The raindrops that fall
are the tears from my crying
The wind's cool breeze
feels like nothing to me
The desert I ran from
is a place inside of me
and though I can run
I will never escape the heat
of a life
that's dying
from the lack
of living
The wind
was a
friend
of
mine
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 11:34 AM UTC