This is our apartment;
Finally, a space all our own.
We moved in on a Tuesday
Just to the outskirts of town.
This is our table
Where so many stories will be shared,
And to go along with it
We'll exchange the futon for a few chairs.
This is our couch
Where we will read our favorite books,
Nothing to interrupt us
But the exchange of seductive looks.
This is our kitchen
Where I'll make him the finest fare.
Every evening on the table by six
Before we eat, we'll say our prayer.
This is our bed
Where our fiery passions ignite.
We fall asleep in each others arms
Beneath scattered rays of moonlight.
This is our apartment
We've been here five months and all is fine.
My parents visit on Wednesdays
He's drinking his third glass of wine.
This is our table
We eat here every day.
Perhaps in a few years
This is where our children will play.
This is our couch
My reading has become unbothered.
I mention my hopes for the future
He assures me he'll never be a father.
This is our kitchen
Dinner is quite the affair.
I set down the final plate
For me, he pulls out my chair.
This is our bed
A bit cooler than before.
Our ********** has become scheduled
And, frankly, something of a bore.
This is our apartment
We've lived here for a year.
He says he must stay late at the office
When he's home he stinks of beer.
This is our table
The stories are getting fewer.
I ask him if it's something I did
He walks away to the shower.
This is our couch
Where I am the only one who sits;
Occasionally my safe haven
To avoid his resentful fits.
This is our kitchen
Where he drinks most of his meals.
After all those long table talks
I no longer know how he feels.
This is our bed
Even colder than it was last year.
He rolls over and touches my arm
I don't dare move from fear.
This is his apartment
I've packed my final suitcase.
One last walk through memory lane
And I'm finally leaving this place.
This is his table
Where dinner parties were held.
Where countless stories were told
And countless more withheld.
This is his couch
Where my hopes and dreams were shattered.
This is his Merlot I'm spilling on it
To remind him none of this matters.
This is his kitchen
Where I threw the bowl of sauce
The night he came home at 3AM
Following a meeting with his boss.
This is his bed
Once dirtied with frenzied devotion.
Now so neat, tidy and ironed
Lacking any and all emotion.
This is the clock
We didn't notice time passing by.
Before we had noticed ten years had passed
And I'm in love with a different guy.
Jul 28, 2014
Jul 28, 2014 at 11:24 PM UTC
A kiss from you took my breath away
And where are you now?
You’ve gone astray
You’ve left me here alone
In a small, miserable town
Left with nothing but a frown
I wish I’d never known you
You took my smile away
I wish I’d never loved you
For all you did was take and run away
In a matter of seconds
My love turned to indifference
I’m left here without a means of existence
I’m hurting badly
But you’re too blinded to see
The promises you’d broken to me
Every time you touched me
Every embrace we shared
Was just another lie
Of how much you didn’t care
I’m sure you’ve replaced me now
In your heart and in your mind
How foolish was I to truly believe
I was your only valentine
Was it all an act?
Every time we that held hands
Or made love?
Was it a clever ruse?
Did you mean to leave me
Broken and abused?
When you said “I love you”
Did you mean a single word?
Or was the idea of loving me
Something so absurd?
You cut me very deeply
Nothing will stop the pain
Every new drop of crimson blood
I’ll bleed until you leave my brain
The saddest thing of all
Is that I cannot stop loving you
Try as I might to fight this affliction
You have brought upon me
I still miss sleeping next to you
Feeling your breath upon my neck
And your lips across my cheek
Why won’t you let me be?
Why did you take my piece of mind
So far away from me?
Jan 17, 2014
Jan 17, 2014 at 12:10 AM UTC
A kiss from you took my breath away
And where are you now?
You’ve gone astray
You’ve left me here alone
In a small, miserable town
Left with nothing but a frown
I wish I’d never known you
You took my smile away
I wish I’d never loved you
For all you did was take and run away
In a matter of seconds
My love turned to indifference
I’m left here without a means of existence
I’m hurting badly
But you’re too blinded to see
The promises you’d broken to me
Every time you touched me
Every embrace we shared
Was just another lie
Of how much you didn’t care
I’m sure you’ve replaced me now
In your heart and in your mind
How foolish was I to truly believe
I was your only valentine
Was it all an act?
Every time we that held hands
Or made love?
Was it a clever ruse?
Did you mean to leave me
Broken and abused?
When you said “I love you”
Did you mean a single word?
Or was the idea of loving me
Something so absurd?
You cut me very deeply
Nothing will stop the pain
Every new drop of crimson blood
I’ll bleed until you leave my brain
The saddest thing of all
Is that I cannot stop loving you
Try as I might to fight this affliction
You have brought upon me
I still miss sleeping next to you
Feeling your breath upon my neck
And your lips across my cheek
Why won’t you let me be?
Why did you take my piece of mind
So far away from me?
Jan 17, 2014
Jan 17, 2014 at 12:10 AM UTC
Before we met
How many times did we pass by
Each other on the street?
How many times did we
Stop at the same stop light
Or wave the other on in traffic?
How many times had we
Ordered coffee from the same barista
Within minutes of the other?
How often did we ride
The same BART train
Or think the same thing
About a person we walked past
On our way to work?
How many friends did we share
If any at all?
Before we met
Did you ever notice me hailing a cab
Or search my bag for loose change?
Did I ever give you a ***** look
When you laughed grotesquely
With your friends
As my own guild slinked by?
Before we met
Had you ever considered
Renting an apartment in my building?
Did you ever pet my cat on the street
Or lazily glace through my
Living room window as you
Waited for the light to turn green?
Did I ever see you
At the delicatessen
Where I eat my lunch?
Before we met
Had we ever met before?
Dec 4, 2012
Dec 4, 2012 at 11:07 PM UTC
**** you.
You are nothing.
You are disgusting.
You are pathetic.
Does a woman
Have to be drunk
In order for you
To get laid?
You are a coward.
You are wretched.
You ***** me.
You took advantage
Of a child
Passed out.
Blacked out,
And defenseless.
Because of you,
I cannot trust.
Because of you,
I cannot feel.
Because of you,
I fear every man's
Intentions.
Because of you,
I was *****
And for that,
I say
**** you!"
Oct 15, 2011
Oct 15, 2011 at 2:13 AM UTC
When a woman is *****
She hides from the cynical eyes.
I went to work
Made idle chitchat
Wrote copays.
Most women avoid ***
And cringe at the thought of ********
I take part in *** compulsively
Crave male attention
I'm engaged nearly every night.
Some go to meetings
To share their struggles.
I don't want to hear your problems
Do not wish to share my own
I offer no support nor input.
**** victims are fragile
They break fairly easily.
I do not break
Nor do I crack
I just am.
I do not fit the description
Of victim nor survivor.
I question myself daily
Was it ****
Or an overreaction?
Most women cry
They seek comfort
They long for understanding
And justice.
I do not.
Am I a victim too?
A survivor?
Neurotic?
Anyone?
Jun 18, 2010
Jun 18, 2010 at 6:22 PM UTC
I just feel so frustrated,
I can't focus at work because I'm constantly fixating
on our most recent argument.
I don't feel listened to;
and when I don't believe everything you believe or talk about
I feel judged and criticized by you.
I'm tired of being the mature one.
I'm tired of waiting around.
If you mention threesomes or DMT one more time,
I'm pretty sure I'll go ape **** on everyone.
Am I not allowed to have taboo topics?
Everyone has some subject they don't like talking about
or feel uncomfortable talking about.
Why can't you understand it?
Why do you insist on talking about the very things
I've expressed less than no interest in?
Why do you question everything I say?
Why do you make me explain myself
when what I've already expressed was all I wanted to say on the matter.
We're not going in the same directions.
I don't mind occasionally just sitting around
smoking until I'm too lazy to move...
sometimes.
But it feels like that's all we do anymore.
I need more excitement and spontaneity.
Lately all we do is smoke and ****
And argue.
I'm sick of arguing.
Mostly because I know you're not listening.
And I'm sick of being ignored.
Mar 24, 2010
Mar 24, 2010 at 4:54 PM UTC
I'm in your thoughts
I'm in your mind
I'm that little voice inside your head
Go on,
Try and hide
You're not safe
Inside your house
Don't worry, baby boy
I'm quiet
Like a fuckin' mouse
I'm tricky, tricky
You don't stand a chance
Cause you got the wrong girl mad
I love you
But I loathe you
And **** can get pretty bad
Mar 21, 2010
Mar 21, 2010 at 10:06 PM UTC
A swig from my glass melts my troubles away
Takes away the frustrations of today
What can I say, what can I say?
At least with liquid gold, it's a better day
My boss is a **** that's what I say
This is a better route, at least for me, anyway
I don't have time to kneel and pray
When liquid gold is an arm's length away
My thirst is not for Ocean Spray
I'm not hungry so what's the use of buffet?
I'd much rather kick back and play
With my liquid gold, I could spend all day
Mar 19, 2010
Mar 19, 2010 at 7:27 PM UTC
I want to tell you
All these secrets inside
I wish to scream them to the heavens
I do not like to hide
A relationship
Where comebacks are all we speak
How can I express to you
This truth that leaves me weak?
We've had so many opportunities
But never spoke a word
Never wrote a note
Never struck a chord
Am I the one to blame?
I built these walls so high
Story after story
Lie after lie after lie
I've only told the truth
When it became an absolute must
I want to let you in
But fear your lack of trust
Now you say you want to know
The things inside my head
Do you really?
I think you don't
I think you'd rather be dead
For you to know what I've become
For you to see what I am
Just another animated statistic
Another young lost lamb
I know you want to be there
To heal the wounds I'll hide
But you cannot handle this world
I've created in my mind
Mother, tell me now
What it is you want to hear
I won't offer this information
The truth is what we fear
The truth is what you fear
Mar 12, 2010
Mar 12, 2010 at 9:13 PM UTC