All the stars start to align
The glowing path gets clearer
Each night
You're checking out
So turn out the lights
Leave me stuck here in the dark
I want to see brilliant shades of red
Blood to paint the walls with my very life
I want to go with you
And forever be by your side
But instead I am tortured by the lights
Take me home
Let me be free
I want to fly away from everything
So distant from what weighs me down
Aug 18, 2017
Aug 18, 2017 at 3:48 AM UTC
It all just seems so utterly hopeless. I try to become happy; I try to be strong, but its getting harder just to live on.
Its not a death sentence, manifested in my mind. But a lack of faith in my future.
The right thing to do is always the hardest. I've lived by these words my entire life and it kept me strong enough to carry the world on my shoulders.
But it seems that my body is caving in and I am slowly losing my right to live. I thought I was passed being depressed. I'm not a kid anymore. I should be able to conquer the world with a pain in my chest and a smile on my face.
Now I know what it is like to feel erased from the face of existance, yet watching my life carry on as if i am a ghost. Trying to see the life i would have lived as if i were still alive.
Aug 12, 2017
Aug 12, 2017 at 10:43 PM UTC
There is a recognizable strength in numbers
When two or more band together for one cause, miracles therein lie
There is closure in groups
A safe heaven in the support and care of others of whom you can rely on
There is a passion in numbers
Of which this world cannot recognize a relationship between you and I and it gives such strength without compromise
So why do I want to be alone?
Jul 31, 2017
Jul 31, 2017 at 5:15 AM UTC
I can still recall
My life
Closing in on itself
Destroying my mind
To the point of a broken
Body
I was weakened
Defenseless
So helpless
I failed to see the end
I was blinded
For, there was no light
To give me color in my eyes
But then I rose up
At my lowest point
I was so weak, I couldn't
Use my hands
And now I stand
Strong
By faith that resides in me
It gave me courage to fight and conquer my worst enemy
Even physical ailments
Can be brought on by doubt
So I changed my mind
And turned my life around
There is nothing that can extinguish the burning flame
Nothing can put out my intangible source of faith
So from this moment on
I will rise and be stronger then ten thousand Legions of angels
For the angel carried me safe from deaths grasp
Jul 31, 2017
Jul 31, 2017 at 5:09 AM UTC
Every one's around me
And my world is quickly fading
I'm on front stage
But in the background
As the music starts to clash
I don't understand
I can't figure out why
The melodies collide
In such an ugly way
Despite each chord or note I try
It all just seems wrong
So I looked out to the empty seats
There couldn't have been but ten people
They didn't seem to notice
That my life was clashing into my existence and they were like mindless puppets, just singing along
The piano holds its key
And it's just me
Its just me who ruined the melody
It's so simple to me
This should come so easily
Although I tried and tried to make things right, I couldn't figure out what's wrong inside of me
I've become my worst enemy
And when they asked me to sing
I was off in my own world
Everyone could hear the sound
Of a broken guitar
So that's when I stopped playing and let my voice take control
Their eyes were filled with wonder
As they touched a piece of my soul
It's so curious to me
Did I let them down?
It should have been obvious to me
But I just couldn't figure it out
So am I wrong?
Am I wrong?
Am I just asking to fall?
What comes easiest to me
Can feel like something like a dream
All that I've worked towards
To all that I aimed for
It all means nothing in the end
Did I lose focus?
Or did I stumble?
It means nothing in the end at all to me
My passion
My worry
My reason to give
Who I am upon a shining billboard
It's So easy for them to see
My reason
My talent
To see me fall after coming so far
I've made it so far
But it's only just a dream
Jun 8, 2017
Jun 8, 2017 at 3:54 AM UTC
This is my only shot at redemption
After all that I've done
Everyone I've hurt
Over my selfish desires
And impulsive turns
I've no choice but to move on
Create a whole new life for myself
Because the person I was born to be
Is now dead
In my mind's sight
This is the only option I have
Otherwise
My physical being
Will turn to nothing
But ash, by my own hands
Letting go is hardly up for debate
But moving on will guide me
Towards that day
And offer me a clean slate
Stripping a rose of its blood red sin
So that, perhaps one day
It can be white again
But the jagged thorns
Offer a reminder:
Just as the scars that surface
And remain eternally,
Portray the dangerous anamour
And the price of vanity
May 20, 2017
May 20, 2017 at 4:21 AM UTC
Can you see a future
Dawning in the horizon?
The birds are singing
To the melody in their hearts
While the Earth basks
In the sound
Can you feel it?
Can you feel my heart beat
Pitter?
It makes me feel so alive
And I see
The silver lining
It's so close
Almost in reach
This isn't me
But I don't know where else
I'd rather be
And I'm tired of believing
That nothing becomes of a dreamer
When nothing comes from doubt
It comes from faith, believing in myself
Out here it's dark~ open my eyes
When I look up to the midnight sky
It's so beautiful
That it takes my breath away
It's so beautiful
How the rarest of things
Break the shadows
Throughout galaxies
So far away from where we are
But still their beauty shines
To cast away the dark
And that's what it's like to dream
Its never giving up
Or letting go
I'm not letting go~
Can you feel it?
Can you feel it?
Can you feel my heart beat
Pitter?
It makes me feel so alive
And I see
The silver lining
It's so close
Almost in reach
It's my dreams...
May 17, 2017
May 17, 2017 at 3:12 AM UTC
I just want to make you smile
Again.
I can feel you drifting slowly along with the current
Further away from where I wait for you
I don't feel my mind is steady
I am restless and I know it isn't you, but me who is slipping away
Vanishing.
I can not break free from this hypnosis
In so deeply, that I'm entranced by the very existence
And all I have in my mind is the memories of my life, as it is my life that evades me
I see the very image of what I've become
A picture, looking through the glass
My reflection.
But the one staring back at me was unfamiliar. It's eyes were shadowed with evil- It's face, a twisted smile
Can't you hear me calling for you?
My voice, echoes into an abyss
Don't you see how rapidly I fall?
You were supposed to save me
May 13, 2017
May 13, 2017 at 3:25 AM UTC
Trial and error
Run in circles throughout my life
Teaching me that there is no decision
Without Consequence
All that my parents left me
After they raised me
Their strict rules of right and wrong
Became meaningless
And they became the examples of sin
That they'd raised me to hate
I don't understand how
Things fell apart so easily
Nor can I comprehend the way
It will all turn out in the end
Even as a young adult, I am finding
myself highly confused
If my parents are allowed to do these things....
Are they living in sin?
Or is sin even real?
I contemplate so many factors in my life
Like how I can't refrain from hurting myself
Or the way I fight so hard each day not to chip away and hurt someone I love
I am toxic and am decaying so quickly
That I can't even see straight
The images all blend and bend
I can't work
I can't sleep
I can't even function or do
The easiest things
But of all the things I wish I couldn't do;
I can breathe
I don't understand why things have to be this way. I don't even understand why I need help.
Still I go in fear of losing myself
But I was never my own person to begin with
May 10, 2017
May 10, 2017 at 5:01 AM UTC
Trial and error
Run in circles throughout my life
Teaching me that there is no decision
Without Consequence
All that my parents left me
After they raised me
Their strict rules of right and wrong
Became meaningless
And they became the examples of sin
That they'd raised me to hate
I don't understand how
Things fell apart so easily
Nor can I comprehend the way
It will all turn out in the end
Even as a young adult, I am finding
myself highly confused
If my parents are allowed to do these things....
Are they living in sin?
Or is sin even real?
I contemplate so many factors in my life
Like how I can't refrain from hurting myself
Or the way I fight so hard each day not to chip away and hurt someone I love
I am toxic and am decaying so quickly
That I can't even see straight
The images all blend and bend
I can't work
I can't sleep
I can't even function or do
The easiest things
But of all the things I wish I couldn't do;
I can breathe
I don't understand why things have to be this way. I don't even understand why I need help.
Still I go in fear of losing myself
But I was never my own person to begin with
May 10, 2017
May 10, 2017 at 5:01 AM UTC