I wonder what songs you play while alone in your car
I wonder how you smell doused in your favorite cologne
I wonder if you play an instrument - piano, drums, maybe even guitar
Curse my inability to spend my days learning you, it’s tearing me apart
Because when I look at you, I see all I’d ever dreamed
Being with you would cure my wretched heart
I’d try every potion and spell, to make you see
That being with me would unlock a world beyond your wildest dreams
Then again, I hardly know you and you don’t know me
Why am I searching for love so far beyond my reach?
The perfect boy, a dazzling Don Juan reincarnate
I’m a lost puppy, waiting and waiting, holding on to people like a leech.
The perfect boy, does such a boy even exist?
I’ve been searching for years, it always backfires on me
Is it a mere fantasy, a myth, or a wish I can’t resist?
Maybe I’m the fool, for believing you’d ever choose me
Because while I wonder the qualities that make you you, she knows everything I could ever ponder and more
And maybe that’s the cruelest part of all - she’s living the dream I wanted to be
Perhaps I was never searching for you at all - only someone to fit the shape of my daydreams
And every time reality reached for me, I tore apart at the seams.
7d ago
May 27, 2026 at 10:59 PM UTC
The man who haunts my every hour
If you’re not dead, then why must your spirit whisper my name?
For why must a fruit taste so sour?
The embodiment of my pain
Embodiment of what you ripped from my flesh to save yourself
Maybe one day I’ll haunt you the same
You’ll see me in her smile
You’ll feel me in her embrace
Why is it with her you go the extra mile?
You threw me to the wolves to steal my soul
They skinned me apart limb by limb while you watched and joined
Was leaving me for dead your goal?
Limping through the mud I saw nothing but darkness
Cries for help masked simply by crickets and frogs
What did I do so wrong to deserve this moment of weakness?
Used for your own guilty pleasures
Tossed out like a bag of bones, fossilizing in the imprint you left
I knew we were destined for fate, I wish I’d taken different measures
Piece me back together, make me whole again
Somebody, something, release me from this hold
If I’m incapable of finding myself, then what then?
Then I saw it, a door to the other side
A glimmer of hope shadowed my despair
The tears that pooled my eyes soon dried
“Come with me” said the invisible force
I gained the strength to stand up and step through the light
I leave behind the shadows, a hopeful course
“Your journey starts anew, you must leave the past behind”
“How must I leave the past behind when my thoughts cast awry?” Said I
"Embrace the present moment, peace you'll find”
With that I took the invisible hand
Awakened with the newfound feeling of peace, in promised land
Aug 31, 2025
Aug 31, 2025 at 6:36 PM UTC