*You shine before the light,
All known light, except, of course, Jesus.
It is something one do not realize
With eyes wide open, but now that
Mine are at a slow close, sweetly,
Blinded by you, it suddenly hit me, braving
This expanding darkness, knowing
That love feels deeply and has deep faith
Which willingly abandons the sense of sight.
I will see you. I see you...in a white dress.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Feb 5, 2017
Feb 5, 2017 at 4:31 AM UTC
*There is no way for you to know it, but
For me to say it, write it like I mean it,
A revelation, a firm oath, telling things like:
"My stubborn heart is a parked automobile
Waiting to be towed away by you."
Because the word "Wait" can be deceiving.
To lie at our Homeland beach in the summer
Of 2017 could mean patience or indulgence.
To fall in line on a counter could mean
Paying or just plain getting.
And to sit at a bus stop could mean
Going home or leaving things behind.
And so this pen tries and tries and tries
And (because King Jehoash stopped short)
Tries and tries and tries some more
To be a decent bouquet of flowers
Or an acoustic cover of a love song
Or a bag of truffles I never once tasted,
Though you don't even notice.
Dearest, I'd rather pursue you
With all that I got knowing full well
That I can possibly fail than to stop short
And spare my self from shame.
I cannot go half-hearted. I'm all in.
And I'm here to win your heart.
So help me God.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 31, 2017
Jan 31, 2017 at 2:31 AM UTC
*God must be really kind to spare you
From my impatience, but it only means
That you have to deal with my persistence,
You have to tame my hard-headed heart.
It does not guarantee that I'd pursue you
With an equal amount of passion
Each and every time, but it certifies
That it can possibly withstand the length
Of wait it requires just to get into your heart,
And the objective is always not to captivate
But to penetrate.
One's love must be generous, not stingy,
Nor cunning, nor selfish, nor proud,
For there's no sound sense in defeating
Your very purpose, being driven
By a hidden agenda. I'm in a battle
Where I don't want to force a draw.
I'm here to help you win, against all pain,
All fear, all doubts.
I want to be your warrior, princess of Jesus.
I want to be what I never got to be before.
I want to be a man, and man up
For the cause which you deserve.
You deserve, at all costs, to be loved.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 29, 2017
Jan 29, 2017 at 5:54 AM UTC
*There is nothing more painful
Than having said goodbye
With an I love you, that you must
Walk on, live life
And pass by an old park bench,
Alone.
There is no night that could sate you,
No banquet can. You can’t help
But crave for it repeatedly,
Her flaws are far away,
Her milk lips, her cheeks, sugared,
The pastry of her neck reminds you
Of her eyes, condescending,
Her sshh, the disregard she has for you,
That yet you always fall for.
You will think of her beauty, divine,
That left from and returned to her ponytail.
Her straight hair can unravel
The emptiness of a thin moon.
Your heart would have left with her fully,
Or lies with you empty, and still
You are confused.
And then you will find out
That there is no such thing, nothing,
Was as clumsy as her smile,
Making a mess of hearts,
The hearts of men.
And so, you sit
At a bench for two, alone,
Drunk, nauseated,
Knowing…
…that you have lost her.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 29, 2017
Jan 29, 2017 at 2:57 AM UTC
*Wrestle me well, my love,
For we were star-crossed enemies,
And I miss you.
My shoulders miss your caring arms,
My lips crave your pale-red tongue,
A slice of refreshment, watermelon,
My chest searches the rise of your chest,
And my torso longs only, and is only,
For your leg locks.
Grapple me and my lightweight heart,
As the backbone of this world breaks,
As the sun sinks into final submission,
But I will never tap on this love out.
Never.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 26, 2017
Jan 26, 2017 at 4:41 PM UTC
*Smile, hold that ever-smile.
Tonight, you will witness a brave star
Unstitch the shadows off his feet.
He will high dive and unload
The weight off his chest
Then burn himself gladly
Towards the law of gravity,
Just to break the icy walls
Of the heart you once thought
Impenetrable, and you will smile,
Sweetly, the smile of smiles.
But someday I will circle you,
One in six, seven on seventh,
Forevermore, and you'll hear me
Say I love you, then you will fall.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 26, 2017
Jan 26, 2017 at 2:33 PM UTC
* Hope is active, it is a verb more than a noun. I cannot let it be defined by the weight or the length of wait, for patience is another thing. My hope is mobile, nomadic, hard-headed, went astray and was lost, but now is marching straight ahead, focused, headed towards your direction.
If I have to settle in the uncertainty, allow in wilderness of time, just to find my self writing these silly love poems, then I'd rather live among the tents around your heart. I will stand by and for it and vow to guard. Shall I be doomed to be the fasting wolf that fends the other wolves away, then so be it. My heart will be yours as your secondary shield.
I am persistence and I am endurance, because they have to go hand in hand, I cannot forsake one over the other, nor lose them both. I am an old train, diligent, opening all doors for one. I am a platform, wide, immovable, a place you can always stand on. And out of thousands and thousands of passengers, I am making up ny mind, you are the one I choose.
You are the one I would wait and wait and wait and wait and wait and wait and (for the 7th time, for in the Bible 7 means completion) wait for, and pray for and gladly fight for, for you are worth it, all of it.
Love perseveres.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 26, 2017
Jan 26, 2017 at 8:55 AM UTC
*I want to be what I should be
In the context of consistency,
Your early morning ritual, the coffee
And the egg that you would like me to be,
A habit you can never get rid of,
A certain pose for the cameras,
A certain post on Instagram, the way,
Exquisite, unique, and endearing
That your mouth motions, your lips lead,
Your cheeks cast the skip-a-beat
Magic of your smile to my heart.
Dearest PVC, I want to learn cardiology.
I want to be the Michael Faudet
For your Lang Leav soul.
I want to move a japanese mountain,
Then be a sushi or a truffle, yes,
I even want to be a truffle.
And I just want to court you...
...like always...
...and after always.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 26, 2017
Jan 26, 2017 at 3:49 AM UTC
*As soon as I have left, I have returned,
Such is my fate, as though
A sudden wave recedes
From the shore, the nomadic wind
Brushing your shy cheeks by,
Lifting your hair, glorious,
In a captivating moment.
No shadow, nor faint light,
Could ever walk with me
Like you do, always. I will roam the Earth
And will not lose you, for a part of you
Is etched, scratched, on melancholic fibers
This heart has. You are,
But a far-off thing I see
In sleepless nights.
I have limited my words among the crowd.
I have limited my self
To an “I love you”, day by day, intending
To say it right there and then,
On that soft cloud you are sleeping on,
Snow angel.
My mouth is not satisfied
From our last kiss, for your laugh
Is for my lips, your lips are,
Your silence.
I have limited my steps into an island.
I could never stray from you,
Though you tend to stray from me,
Little by little, word after word,
Look after look, blink
After blink,
Pardon me, if I see to it,
That you sit gracefully,
That I see to it that you are simple
As a white rose, that I deeply feel
That your heart, dear, is across from mine,
That I see to it that my feet
Are across from yours, even that,
Even just that.
Forgive me,
If I have limited my self
Into a question
For you to answer.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 23, 2017
Jan 23, 2017 at 7:12 AM UTC
*I would draw a curve like those
Of a fishing boat, its bottom,
Or the body of the moon sometimes
In its perfect time
And begin to dream.
And google things like,
"a small depression in the flesh,
Either one that exists permanently
Or one that forms in the cheeks
When one smiles",
And then write poetry,
Subpar to the actual thing.
You don't know the magic that you are.
Through your smile,
I learned to cheat all death, all life,
All me, all being, all being,
All what-ifs and trying-to-be-s.
Through your smile, I knew,
That God is good, has been
And always will be.
Through you, I knew,
I have always been happy.*
© 2017 J.S.P.
Jan 22, 2017
Jan 22, 2017 at 5:45 PM UTC