josie-heggaton
I am 24 years old. A wife and a mother of two beautiful boys. I was in a really bad place when I was younger until I found writing. I had never been able to accept things that had happened to me in my life until one day I put them on paper. Now writing heals me. I know it sounds silly to some but it is like if I put it on paper I can let it go. Every word I write is about my life. I could never write about things that I don't know from personal experience. it is just not who I am. Love, hate, and my choices are the main themes in my writings. I know not all of my poems rhyme. Some don't even make since unless you know me. I am an open book and will answer any question asked about me or what I write. I don't hide who I am, and am not ashamed of my life. I look at life as a map. I took some bad roads but they all lead me where I am. Tomorrow I might take a new road and that will lead me to where I will be.
You are free now so what will you do
Go back home and be the man they all knew
Or the changed person that I see
A real man who wants to stay free
You have been forced to learn a lesson with time
A sentence for a no evidence crime
You can be sad and even downright mad
But you can’t hold onto the pain of the time you could have had
If you let pain hold you back from the person you have become
You will walk into the future only feeling numb
You will not feel the joy that you deserve
Only feeling the time that you had to serve
I know Let it go is easy to say
Especially for the hard price that you had to pay
I am here to lend an ear
You always have my support in the coming years
A father, a friend, and someone they can lean on
This is the man that must come home
Aug 8, 2025
Aug 8, 2025 at 4:03 PM UTC
Dreams, hopes, and prayers
Brought to my knees right there
Tubes were giving you breath
All of my fears lead to death
Nurses all aroundwith this look on their face
I thought it could be my last embrace
I held you down for each blood withdrawal
Everytime it broke off a piece of my heart
You were just so tiny and small
You could hear my heart beat all down the hall
The doctors looked with sadness in their eyes
So many little babies had fought and died
But you are mine
You were made to shine
Fighting is in your blood
I gained more hope hearing your hearts little thud
You are as strong as a fighter must be
So I will be strong and pull out the mother in me
I took you home with every medication in hand
This will not be our last stand
You will grow and be brave as you must do
Because my heart would die without you
So fight little boy
Keep breathing on your own
God can not call
I will not let him call you home
May 12, 2020
May 12, 2020 at 11:39 AM UTC
Looking so young and healthy
The hardest thing i do
Feeling so weak and broken
All the pain I hide from you
My body attacks itself
Noone understands the hand i was delt
I was raised to never be weak
It was a sign of defeat
Silence the hurt locking it away
Just try to make it through each day
Walking makes me ache
Lifting makes me shake
Feet touching the floor
I have to make myself move to the door
Living in fear of flare
Relapse is part of the deal
Don't have a disease you can see
The battle is inside of me
Apr 18, 2020
Apr 18, 2020 at 11:49 PM UTC
Fighting every day
No pain shown on my face
You won't see my battle
I will fight with grace
Playing with my baby's
I will win this race
Working every day
I will match everyone's pace
Won't walk with my limp
I have earned my place
Holding my head high
I wont let you see me cry
If you see a glint in my eye
Just know i will flight not lay down and die
The battle i fight
It is one within
It is one that i will win
Apr 18, 2020
Apr 18, 2020 at 11:46 PM UTC
The tree is tall
The branches grow wide
Some reaching side by side
Unconditional and scared by life
Each leaf has more than on side
Without the leaves
A tree grows bear
Each leaf is a testament
Showing love that has been shared
This tree was planted at the dawn of time
No one knowing how tall it would become
Or how much life would grow
The day that the first two became one
The tree may die one day
The leaves will fall and decay
But the love that was shared
And the memories that were made
Those will last forever
Until the earths dying day
Feb 23, 2018
Feb 23, 2018 at 7:32 PM UTC
Thank you for loving me
And taking me in
The love you had given,
I continue to hold within
More Children you did not need,
But you took us in with your love unconditionally
In life dad you were loved so dearly,
In death that love stays the same
I breaks the hearts of so many to see you go,
But you did not leave alone
Pieces of all of us went with you,
The day God called you home
Life in not about what you can gain or of greed
It is about what you gave to those in need
A home and a safe place to be
You always gave this, alone with love to me
Rest now dad, as we say goodbye
We will see you again one day,
Standing by Gods side
Feb 23, 2018
Feb 23, 2018 at 7:31 PM UTC
A tiny little heart that never beat
Feet that never really grew
A beautiful little person who never got to know
The pure love you mom and dad never got to show
Instead of seeing your first smile
We had to let you go
There will be no kisses on your sweet little face
Only pain in my heart that no one can ever erase
We wanted to hold you so tight
In our arms full of love where you would have fit just right
Instead we said goodbye to someone we never met
If only and what could have been are all we will ever get
A baby book was never filled out
But our love for you never came with doubt
Mommy fought, begged, and prayed
Daddy sat silent hoping you would stay
Tears fell to the ground so hard
But god just dealt you the wrong card
Your brothers would have loved you and taught you so much
The little bitty baby they never got to touch
To be parents to you would have given us such pride
If only you didn’t need to go flying in the sky
I hope you have beautiful wings
And you get to hear all of the angels sing
Goodbye to our tiny little love
Goodbye to my baby, fly like a dove
Feb 23, 2018
Feb 23, 2018 at 7:31 PM UTC
A Momma bakes the bread
And cleans the floors
She opens up all you doors
Wiping off your silly face
Those are the things that make her day
You never think she will say goodbye
Her soul leaving for the sky
You will need her then and pray it’s not real
But she will but gone unable to hear
The days will be spent wishing for the past
That she had not left you quite so fast
Feb 23, 2018
Feb 23, 2018 at 7:29 PM UTC
You loved me for me
You held me and cared
You wiped away my tears
Told me you would always be there
Two hearts were left bare
Then stomped into the ground
Leveled to dust
Because we both laid them down
We both broke us in two
But you will always have the half of my that will forever love you
Apr 29, 2015
Apr 29, 2015 at 7:46 AM UTC
The words never left
Just got locked behind
A door so black
No one could find
I put it all away
Feeling that I hide
The ones that scare
Locked in a book
Held inside
Opening wounds that never heal
I hide them away so I don’t feel
I can reveal my secrets
But I hate the looks
The pity I see
When they open my book
I hide my pain on the pages
But they never leave my side
It will not judge or force regret
Taking me as I am
Flawed and broken but held together with bindings
These pages are my writings
Apr 29, 2015
Apr 29, 2015 at 7:44 AM UTC