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joshua-helmuth
joshua-helmuth
25/M/American Please feel free to leave feedback
I wish I could... I wish I would... I wish, I wish but when will I do The things I wish for will never come true I only wish. There is no action And wishing gives just brief satisfaction The more I wish, the worse it gets Nothing ever comes from wishing and yet I'll continue to wish with a singular hope That something will happen, a wish to cope With feeling like nothing, a wish gone unheard Wishing for something, but something is earned
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May 2, 2020
May 2, 2020 at 1:59 AM UTC
I Wish
I've returned to this place, but not how I had hoped The walls peeling, ceilings drip, floorboards curved and sloped Mildew spreads around corners and shadows swallow light Thoughts creep in like whispers, forcing me to write They're in my head again, the infestations swell Clawing at my eyelids, the night escapes. Oh well Perhaps I am the intruder I left this place to rot Yet, it's the one who evicted me It is I who I forgot
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Jul 15, 2018
Jul 15, 2018 at 1:30 AM UTC
In My Head Again
Hello and welcome This is my mind Sorry for the mess When I think, this is where the thoughts go and most of the time this is where they stay I'd like to say I know where everything is but that would be a lie I know that my ideas are somewhere by the door I was planning on taking them out and putting them on display I guess I forgot to get around to it Now where did I put those thoughts I never said? Oh well. Here are some memories but I guess they got damaged when I made room for more That giant stack over there? the one that takes up a fourth of the room? Those are song lyrics No, I didn't make those. I just like them. What was I looking for? Well shoot. I guess I'll just come back later if I remember to remember Oh? What did you find? That? It's just a little something I wrote up You can go ahead and take it if you want It's just a reminder to Organize the Noise This place just gets so crowed It feels like the place is going to explode sometimes So you can take that There are some things that I just shouldn't keep in
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Apr 12, 2017
Apr 12, 2017 at 3:20 PM UTC
Organize the Noise
The sun rose, once upon a time Long ago Before this darkness of mine The light set the world ablaze A short night To the longest of days But the brightness dimmed The sun died away And forever night I felt it would stay Then on the horizon a ray pierced through Even brighter A new light brought by you So now the sun rises once more And I can see more clearly Than I could before
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Aug 2, 2016
Aug 2, 2016 at 1:07 AM UTC
A New Sunrise
Can you see them? The wounds internal Leaping again Over new hurdles The air is thin My skin is thinner Infection spreads Pull the splinter It's been a pleasure Under the knife And it's a privilege To be alive Surrender is an option Though it is bitter It's strength, not weakness I'm holding the blister In comes the tide With a heart closed wide The right choice The wrong outcome Filled with white noise Mind held for ransom Personal growth Ripped out root and stem Emotional drought Break down the dam It's been a pleasure Under the knife And it's a privilege To be alive Surrender is an option Though it is bitter It's strength, not weakness I'm holding the blister In comes the tide With a heart closed wide Breathing easy Choke back the truth Showing the scars Hiding the bruise Carrying baggage And the world's weight En route to ruin Stopped at the gate Learn from mistakes To make thing worse No peace at rest Live through the curse It's been a pleasure Under the knife And it's a privilege To be alive Surrender is an option Though it is bitter It's strength, not weakness I'm holding the blister In comes the tide With a heart closed wide
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Dec 18, 2015
Dec 18, 2015 at 12:44 AM UTC
Lies of Omission
Can I show you something? Don't tell anyone else What I have right here Is a secret, ok? Here it is Isn't it beautiful? I found it not too long ago See how it shines in the light? Look at all the swirls How they change from Pale blue to fiery red Feel it It's warm Doesn't it make your body tingle? What's it called? I've heard it's name somewhere I think It's called Solace
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Dec 7, 2015
Dec 7, 2015 at 2:54 AM UTC
A Piece Of Peace
Light seems to shine brightest through tears And color's most vibrant after storms Joy is only felt because sadness is known And something new replaces only something worn The beauty in sorrow is not always seen So we avoid any kind of lament But melancholy is mesmeric and somberness shimmers in the dark It's the misery and grief we resent Remember this when your heart becomes an anchor There is great beauty in sorrow, in solitude, in pain Watery eyes and broken souls aren't ugly For you can't have a rainbow without the rain
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Dec 5, 2015
Dec 5, 2015 at 3:45 AM UTC
Beautiful Sorrow
Each place I stay feels different But at the core they're all the same The only thing that changes Is who I am, though not by name To find something new Is difficult to do When you don't know what you want And this journey's too long For the end to be wrong But the right destination is a taunt Comfort is the bane of progress So I don't know why I'm still here It feels like changing is impossible I need help to move on from familiar
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Dec 4, 2015
Dec 4, 2015 at 1:56 AM UTC
Nomad
These are the thoughts of... No This is the only idea that... ****** A wall of thought to an ocean of... Seriously? The writer's block is... Oh come on A good idea is not... sigh I won't give up until.. Never mind...
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Sep 18, 2015
Sep 18, 2015 at 1:20 AM UTC
From Start to...
The moon is my balloon It follows me wherever I go Cross-country or globally Sometimes I lose it In the clouds of snow and rain But it always returns It glows in the dark And brightens the deepest nights Beauty luminescent
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Jul 1, 2015
Jul 1, 2015 at 11:56 PM UTC
My Balloon