I want to live in my dreams
in that nether place, I go
when I'm completely still,
where my mind wanders senseless
in that moment
without a future or past
unbounded from all rhyme and reason,
time and space,
free from fate's determination.
I just want to sleep the endless sleep
and float instead of swim.
Aug 24, 2024
Aug 24, 2024 at 3:26 PM UTC
I'm playing hide and seek
with depression.
I hide in the company of others
only to be found
when I'm alone.
Aug 24, 2024
Aug 24, 2024 at 3:24 PM UTC
I don't want to be awake anymore
so I keep rehearsing my death.
Ask for my plan
and I will give you more detail
than what you think is safe.
Every night I pray for mortality;
for a life that ends.
Oct 10, 2021
Oct 10, 2021 at 11:35 AM UTC
I set a goal for myself,
to write one word today,
nothing ambitious
or profound,
just one word
to start again,
just one word
to show the way.
Believe.
May 21, 2020
May 21, 2020 at 9:31 AM UTC
Come sit with me
for a while
and I'll tell you
your story.
It won't take long.
I've watched from afar
and have stood by your side.
I know all the details:
the hollow dreams
the heartfelt wishes
the prayers
the loneliness
I'm the only one
who understands;
the only one
who has shared your burden
Come sit with me
now.
Share my blanket,
throw it over your shoulders
and melt into it's warm embrace.
Soon it'll all be over.
Your ears will rush
then fall silent.
Your thoughts will scatter
then disappear.
Your mind will clench
and then relax
and in that moment
that very last moment,
your story will end.
May 21, 2020
May 21, 2020 at 9:22 AM UTC
If you were told
you have to live your life
all over again,
without changing a single thing,
would you be happy or sad?
May 21, 2020
May 21, 2020 at 9:20 AM UTC
I was sorting my memories,
from left to right,
placing them carefully
on each side of a scale.
I was hoping to find a balance
to settle my thoughts;
an equilibrium
that would calm my mind.
But I soon discovered,
my dark memories
were much heavier
than all the others,
and my perspective was burdened
by an unfriendly past.
I wish I could just take
all that melancholy
and pile it high,
all those failures,
mistakes
and betrayals,
then strike a match
setting fire to the darkness
consuming it to dust,
scattered and weightless.
Only then would the scale tip
back in my favour.
Only then would my true memories
be measured.
Dec 20, 2018
Dec 20, 2018 at 1:46 PM UTC
I want to feel worthwhile
I want a peaceful mind
that turns away from suicide.
I want life to be
my greatest accomplishment,
not death.
Dec 14, 2018
Dec 14, 2018 at 12:07 PM UTC
I save my life every day.
Every morning I wake up
and decide to live,
even though my limbs are heavy
and my mind stumbles,
I still heave myself up,
put my feet on the floor
and stand
Dec 12, 2018
Dec 12, 2018 at 1:09 PM UTC