john-chris-risner
American
My mission in life is to find happiness. To define, find, or create the person that I am to become. Psychology is my life, philosophy is my passion. I ask not who we are, but why we do the things we do. Not why things are the way they are, but why we perceive them the way we do. Not what the future has in store, but what we intend to do with our future.
You can wrap your arms around me
at the end of a long day.
You can press your lips to mine
as in my bed, we lay.
You can lean in on my shoulder
when you’re hardest hit.
You can speak with me your mind
and I won’t question you a bit.
You can hold my hand so tight
and never let it go.
You can call on me any moment,
this, I want you to know.
You can whisper sweet nothings in my ear,
tell me what’s on your mind.
You can give in to your desires,
as I will give in to mine.
We can run away together,
if that is what you crave.
Travel the world together,
surf the ocean’s waves.
All these things you’re free to do,
everything you dream of.
But, still, I must caution you, my dear…
we can never fall in love.
Jul 24, 2015
Jul 24, 2015 at 10:30 AM UTC
I forged a tower amongst the gods,
left to the cold, one time forgot.
I closed its doors and cast a spell,
left the key in infernal hell.
I built its walls so long ago,
built it strong of unyielding stone.
I built it tall so none could scale,
built it solid and built it well.
I fortified it with tempered steel,
and within its walls forever sealed…
My heart so tainted and full of pain,
to rest in slumber for all its days.
I built it on the highest peak,
built it in the heavens, so to speak.
I built in a place that none may dwell,
built it strong and built it well.
The roof I carved from dragon’s bone,
their deaths something for which I still atone.
The doors locked with gate and key,
shut forever, for eternity.
I built it with a heavy heart,
built it strong and built it smart.
I built it from the blackest shell,
built it safe and built it well.
To protect something so dear to me,
I vowed that I would never set it free.
It had been damaged in the past,
so I built this tower to forever last.
But something that I did not foresee,
something that had blinded me.
The foundation lay upon your very skin,
and with every breath, you seep right in.
Jul 15, 2015
Jul 15, 2015 at 12:23 AM UTC
Quiet now.
I can’t hear you speak.
These thoughts that my mind bears.
Hollow tongue in cheek.
I purge you from my thoughts.
I go on for a time.
Then you come crawling back
from the darkest corners of my mind.
What is this emptiness?
What of this pain I bear?
Why won’t you let me be?
Or else admit you care?
You push me away again.
And silence devours us two.
I’m back at square one again,
trying to forget about you.
It hurts me on these nights.
When I can’t have you near.
You pull away because you’re afraid,
but you’re not alone with this fear.
I know not what tomorrow holds.
Nor when my time on this earth is through.
I know not what plagues your thoughts,
or if I matter to you.
This silence, it has consumed me.
And forever, you grow afar.
I try to move on without you,
but long to be where you are.
Yet this is the path you’ve chosen,
as I seek a future long gone.
Reaching out for a helping hand,
I find that I’m alone.
I purge these voices from my mind,
and this goodbye, I disavow.
I long for the world in my dreams,
yet, they’ve grown quiet now.
Jul 14, 2015
Jul 14, 2015 at 11:39 PM UTC
They met by chance, or by fate,
one humid summer day.
They clicked, as people sometimes do,
without even meeting face to face.
He had answered an ad,
there was an opening in his town.
She called him in for a meeting,
and it turned their worlds upside down.
Sparks, they flew, as they sometimes do,
and things were right as rain.
They laughed and talked for hours on end,
but then something changed.
He had no clue her hand was taken,
a revelation soon brought to light.
She had made a vow,
to someone else in her life.
When next they met,
with broken hearts, she whispered not a sound.
When next they spoke,
he gave her his blessing, on the love that she had found.
But from time to time, the truth creeps out,
and things become so clear.
He feels the weight of such a loss,
especially when she’s near.
He jokes about what could have been,
things he says he doesn’t mean.
He feels his mind slipping away,
and wishes he could have foreseen.
Meanwhile, she steals a glance from across the room,
then quickly looks away.
She feels her heart skip a beat,
so many things she cannot say.
Sometimes she wants to take it back,
she longs to be with him so.
He wants nothing more than to hold her,
To take her hand and never let go.
But that was not the road that chance,
the road that fate had in store.
Now they are only friends,
when it could have been so much more.
That look on his face will forever haunt her,
when he saw her hand that day.
And the golden shackle that weighed it down,
a diamond that did betray.
She remembers well that moment,
and it shall haunt her hitherto.
The day that she accepted that ring,
and spoke the words “I do.”
Aug 2, 2013
Aug 2, 2013 at 2:09 AM UTC
My heart, it holds on.
To shadows of days past.
My mind, it searches…
for answers at long last.
I know not if I should wait,
or if I should move on.
My mind resists this love,
my heart is too far gone.
What would you have of me?
Should I continue this pursuit?
Am I wasting my time?
Is there nothing left of me and you?
Your silence baffles me,
you never speak a sound.
Your smile captivates me,
your eyes, they do astound.
My heart is forever yours.
My mind conflicted, it’s true.
Should I let go or persevere?
What would you have me do?
Mar 16, 2013
Mar 16, 2013 at 11:13 PM UTC
Can you hear me now?
Have I faded out?
Are we broken down?
Riddled full of doubt?
Will we persevere?
Or give in to it all?
Consumed forever by fear?
Unable to stand tall?
Will we walk again?
Or are we doomed to crawl?
Will you tell me where you stand?
My hazy mind just can't recall.
I cannot offer much.
I have little left to give.
I'll teach you how to love.
If you teach me how to live.
And we'll think of days gone by.
When we were burning at the core.
Here forever by your side,
I could ask for nothing more.
Dec 20, 2012
Dec 20, 2012 at 4:13 AM UTC
I watched him grow…
From a child into a man.
I helped him where I could…
Still do, when I can.
I was there for his first steps…
Before that, he learned to crawl.
I helped him learn to stand…
and to bounce back up when he would fall.
I gave him my advice…
He ignored it now and then.
I lectured him on values…
Of virtue and of sin.
I believed he could do anything…
If he chose it to be so.
In him, I had no doubt…
Of the places he could go.
And now the time has come…
I must release my grasp.
On the boy I cherish so dearly…
And memories of the past.
He saw me watching him…
As he grew from boy to man.
And those times that I was in need,
He always had my hand.
He watched me stumble,
And after that, he saw me fall.
He taught me to stand again…
and did not judge at all.
He listened to my words…
When I had words to give.
I taught him to be wise…
He taught me how to live.
I believed he could do anything…
And he did make it so.
But now I must teach myself…
How to let him go.
Sep 23, 2012
Sep 23, 2012 at 11:17 PM UTC
Why do you smile so?
What makes you come alive?
I watch everything fall away around you,
but that smile stays at your side.
Do you seek salvation?
Are you not afraid to fall?
All the world comes tumbling down,
but I find you still stand tall.
Where do you find this strength?
How do you handle this pain?
You carry yourself with grace and honor,
and carry me the same.
Who have you turned to now?
When will you find me again?
Somehow I’ve lost you along the way,
but you’re still here within.
Jul 15, 2012
Jul 15, 2012 at 7:22 AM UTC
If I am to find you,
If I have to risk it all.
If I have to traverse across the world,
believe I will heed the call.
If we are to be as one,
If the answers are here to find.
If I seek you out, will you be there?
Consider it for a time.
If you know these things I feel,
If the truth will set us free.
If you have the wisdom to explain these ails,
please enlighten me.
If hope is not abandoned,
If love is in the air.
If you want me, then call out my name -
trust that I’ll be there.
If happiness is laughter,
If all it takes is love.
If I am to have my ever after,
know you are the one.
Jul 15, 2012
Jul 15, 2012 at 7:20 AM UTC
The night is dark in my world.
I listen to its song.
The breeze sweeps through sweet melodies,
and cries for days long gone.
I’ve lost her somewhere tonight.
I cannot hear her now.
The skies, they cry, and time does fly,
though it seems so broken down.
The stars flicker above my world,
I watch them dance and shine.
The light they give is reason to live,
true beauty unconfined.
I wished upon a star tonight.
I long for her happiness so.
Time stands still, it’s so surreal,
Yet, I must let her go.
The moon casts a shadow on my world,
I feel it chill my skin.
The shade it casts is not unlike a mask,
veiling the truth within.
I dreamed of her again as I slept,
I search for her every night.
Though she is gone, my heart holds on,
and it won’t give in without a fight.
Jun 10, 2012
Jun 10, 2012 at 7:35 PM UTC