jaden - Hello Poetry

she's got eyes blue enough to swim in, deep enough to drown in. she'll make you want to get lost at sea. i didn't know it was possible to love the undertow until i met her. she will draw you in just like the moon pulls the tide in an attempt to keep the two bodies together. yet she will ward you off, keep you at bay. it's hard to fall in love with a sailing ship from the dock. she is a beacon of light too bright to observe. her hands are the coldest you'll ever hold; i think her heart is too. she's always been too scared and unprepared to let anyone get close to her. the girl that carries the weight of the world on her shoulders but isn't strong enough to walk away. j.c.

0

Dec 10, 2020

Dec 10, 2020 at 2:14 AM UTC

an ephemeral encounter

she's got eyes blue enough to swim in, deep enough to drown in. she'll make you want to get lost at sea. i didn't know it was possible to love the undertow until i met her. she will draw you in just like the moon pulls the tide in an attempt to keep the two bodies together. yet she will ward you off, keep you at bay. it's hard to fall in love with a sailing ship from the dock. she is a beacon of light too bright to observe. her hands are the coldest you'll ever hold; i think her heart is too. she's always been too scared and unprepared to let anyone get close to her. the girl that carries the weight of the world on her shoulders but isn't strong enough to walk away. j.c.

19

i'm going to tell you a story about the girl who carved novels into her wrists because she struggled to find the right words to say. she would often find herself choking on misplaced syllables and unexpected vowels. you see, the lump in her throat is all the words she'd wished she'd said trying to claw their way out of her. the lump in her throat isn't a can't, it's a won't. so when you ask her why she doesn't speak it's not because she lacks the ability to form rational thoughts and coherent sentences. it is because she finds no struggle in her silence. and when you ask her what's wrong, she'll say nothing. but if you're lucky, she might roll up her sleeves revealing what had been known only to her. and maybe you won't know what to say and that's alright. but don't just tell her to stop. that's like telling someone not to jump when their toes are already curled around the ledge. instead, acknowledge that what she's feeling is real and be her voice when she can't find the words. j.c.

0

Nov 15, 2019

Nov 15, 2019 at 10:57 PM UTC

it takes just one

i'm going to tell you a story about the girl who carved novels into her wrists because she struggled to find the right words to say. she would often find herself choking on misplaced syllables and unexpected vowels. you see, the lump in her throat is all the words she'd wished she'd said trying to claw their way out of her. the lump in her throat isn't a can't, it's a won't. so when you ask her why she doesn't speak it's not because she lacks the ability to form rational thoughts and coherent sentences. it is because she finds no struggle in her silence. and when you ask her what's wrong, she'll say nothing. but if you're lucky, she might roll up her sleeves revealing what had been known only to her. and maybe you won't know what to say and that's alright. but don't just tell her to stop. that's like telling someone not to jump when their toes are already curled around the ledge. instead, acknowledge that what she's feeling is real and be her voice when she can't find the words. j.c.

34

bodies fit together and sometimes they don't. cupid struck me with a billion arrows, each with precision and force. i guess he was so focused on me he forgot about you. you coursed through my veins, ran laps in my head. you filled me to the brim. my love for you ran deep but the feeling was not mutual. you see, when he tells you he cares, he means only when it is convenient for him. listen when i say: one-sided love is not really love at all, simply adoration. and i know now that i deserved better than anything you had to offer. you taught me to not beg for what does not want to stay. bodies fit together and sometimes they don't and although i promised myself i'd get over it, i still like to think that it hurt you too j.c.

0

Nov 15, 2019

Nov 15, 2019 at 10:47 PM UTC

perfect match

bodies fit together and sometimes they don't. cupid struck me with a billion arrows, each with precision and force. i guess he was so focused on me he forgot about you. you coursed through my veins, ran laps in my head. you filled me to the brim. my love for you ran deep but the feeling was not mutual. you see, when he tells you he cares, he means only when it is convenient for him. listen when i say: one-sided love is not really love at all, simply adoration. and i know now that i deserved better than anything you had to offer. you taught me to not beg for what does not want to stay. bodies fit together and sometimes they don't and although i promised myself i'd get over it, i still like to think that it hurt you too j.c.

24

today i remembered what he smelled like. i caught a whiff of something oddly familiar. at first, i wasn't sure what it was, but it hit me all too fast. it was him. i'm somehow always caught between forgetting he's dead and remembering he's dead. today i remembered. chocolate axe body wash with a hint of lavender-- that's him. it jogged my memory in an aggressive fashion, almost intrusive. all this time i was searching for him and came up short. this time he found me. the pursuit was long over. after all, it's been almost two years but there's something about it; it shook me to the core, it jolted me awake. you see, all this time i was asleep in a cloudy daze lost with no direction but now? now the quest continues with an unfamiliar sense of urgency. how can i get to you? how can i bring you back to me? j.c.

0

May 4, 2019

May 4, 2019 at 3:59 AM UTC

dad

today i remembered what he smelled like. i caught a whiff of something oddly familiar. at first, i wasn't sure what it was, but it hit me all too fast. it was him. i'm somehow always caught between forgetting he's dead and remembering he's dead. today i remembered. chocolate axe body wash with a hint of lavender-- that's him. it jogged my memory in an aggressive fashion, almost intrusive. all this time i was searching for him and came up short. this time he found me. the pursuit was long over. after all, it's been almost two years but there's something about it; it shook me to the core, it jolted me awake. you see, all this time i was asleep in a cloudy daze lost with no direction but now? now the quest continues with an unfamiliar sense of urgency. how can i get to you? how can i bring you back to me? j.c.

28

you always said "there's plenty of fish in the sea", but every one i come across, i compare to you. i have yet to find one worth drowning for. j.c.

0

Sep 23, 2017

Sep 23, 2017 at 4:33 AM UTC

you're the only fish for me

you always said "there's plenty of fish in the sea", but every one i come across, i compare to you. i have yet to find one worth drowning for. j.c.

6

they used to say our love was forever-- the kind that makes you watch, and wait, and hope-- the kind you should stand by. the day eternity came to an end you said "no hard feelings.” but there were no feelings at all. you left me profoundly callous. you see, you were everything extraordinary about me. i remain cold, removed, keeping my distance from any potential afflictions. i need not worry to weigh me down. j.c.

0

Aug 4, 2017

Aug 4, 2017 at 3:27 AM UTC

untitled

they used to say our love was forever-- the kind that makes you watch, and wait, and hope-- the kind you should stand by. the day eternity came to an end you said "no hard feelings.” but there were no feelings at all. you left me profoundly callous. you see, you were everything extraordinary about me. i remain cold, removed, keeping my distance from any potential afflictions. i need not worry to weigh me down. j.c.

16

when you leave home, home leaves you little did i know that meant forgetting what his room smelled like j.c.

0

Aug 4, 2017

Aug 4, 2017 at 3:22 AM UTC

missing him but also myself

when you leave home, home leaves you little did i know that meant forgetting what his room smelled like j.c.

4

they say that if a butterfly ***** its wings at just the right place, at just the right time, it can cause a hurricane halfway around the world. crazy isn't it? how something so delicate can collapse an entire village. makes me wonder if you knew you had a poisonous touch-- mercury running through your veins like Hermes relaying messages back to Zeus--Jupiter. there is a massive storm larger than Earth that has raged the planet relentlessly for hundreds of years no end in sight. they call it the Great Red Spot. it reminds me of you. how long did it take for you to grow into your anger? your fists have been balled for as long as i can remember. got me wondering when you're gonna swing. j.c

0

Aug 4, 2017

Aug 4, 2017 at 3:21 AM UTC

the butterfly effect

they say that if a butterfly ***** its wings at just the right place, at just the right time, it can cause a hurricane halfway around the world. crazy isn't it? how something so delicate can collapse an entire village. makes me wonder if you knew you had a poisonous touch-- mercury running through your veins like Hermes relaying messages back to Zeus--Jupiter. there is a massive storm larger than Earth that has raged the planet relentlessly for hundreds of years no end in sight. they call it the Great Red Spot. it reminds me of you. how long did it take for you to grow into your anger? your fists have been balled for as long as i can remember. got me wondering when you're gonna swing. j.c

22

i think my demons are feeling replaced. the things they would normally communicate to me are coming out of the mouths of those i am forced to surround myself with. you can't be convinced of something you've already accepted. i used to pray for the voices to stop but ever since they've been quieted by those around me, i've decided that i'd rather have the voices-- the lesser of two evils. it's ironic, isn't it? like how i crawled into my bed last night and cried, "i just want to go home" until i fell asleep. am i supposed to feel disappointed every time i wake up? i shouldn't feel like a stranger in my own skin. lately i've been struggling a lot in this sea of anxiety. it's hard to float with bullet holes in your back. maybe that's why i've been drowning for as long as i can remember. just pull me under. please. j.c.

0

Aug 4, 2017

Aug 4, 2017 at 3:14 AM UTC

4/12/16

i think my demons are feeling replaced. the things they would normally communicate to me are coming out of the mouths of those i am forced to surround myself with. you can't be convinced of something you've already accepted. i used to pray for the voices to stop but ever since they've been quieted by those around me, i've decided that i'd rather have the voices-- the lesser of two evils. it's ironic, isn't it? like how i crawled into my bed last night and cried, "i just want to go home" until i fell asleep. am i supposed to feel disappointed every time i wake up? i shouldn't feel like a stranger in my own skin. lately i've been struggling a lot in this sea of anxiety. it's hard to float with bullet holes in your back. maybe that's why i've been drowning for as long as i can remember. just pull me under. please. j.c.

22

so i guess this is it, the end of forever; no one could've seen this coming. the separation of past, present, and future. past: a smile from you could spawn a kaleidoscope of monarchs in the pit of my stomach. i fell in love with the way you rested your chin upon my head, we were invincible. i could have laid in your arms for years. i would have. i had enough hope to feed a village. present: you tell me this was long overdue, that we're past our prime, but there's no expiration date on the sound of your laughter. how do i explain to you there are parts of my life that move slower without you in them? today i am a quiet shade of blue. future: people will ask me what was loving him like? and i will smile and say ***it was as if the sadness had never swept me under the rug***. i will tell them how i felt whole, how you gave me something to look forward to. i will tell them how you lit a fire in my chest and evacuated only yourself. no words, no warning, not even the butterflies made it out alive. i should have known this was coming by the way you always reeked of smoke and bad intentions. you see, i confused you for someone who would hold my hand when things got dark. i just wish i had some closure. j.c.

0

Nov 19, 2016

Nov 19, 2016 at 10:27 PM UTC

don't let the arsonist light the way

so i guess this is it, the end of forever; no one could've seen this coming. the separation of past, present, and future. past: a smile from you could spawn a kaleidoscope of monarchs in the pit of my stomach. i fell in love with the way you rested your chin upon my head, we were invincible. i could have laid in your arms for years. i would have. i had enough hope to feed a village. present: you tell me this was long overdue, that we're past our prime, but there's no expiration date on the sound of your laughter. how do i explain to you there are parts of my life that move slower without you in them? today i am a quiet shade of blue. future: people will ask me what was loving him like? and i will smile and say ***it was as if the sadness had never swept me under the rug***. i will tell them how i felt whole, how you gave me something to look forward to. i will tell them how you lit a fire in my chest and evacuated only yourself. no words, no warning, not even the butterflies made it out alive. i should have known this was coming by the way you always reeked of smoke and bad intentions. you see, i confused you for someone who would hold my hand when things got dark. i just wish i had some closure. j.c.

55