i don’t take my socks off before bed anymore.
i’ve been throwing
trash into my second drawer,
and I’ve been staying up later
finding anything anyone i can sink
my teeth into. jenna jokes that i’m
a vampire, and it’s getting paler outside
and my skin is getting colder. the sun yawns while i set and
i should’ve been in bed two hours ago. tomorrow’s gonna be so mad at me in five and a half hours.
i don’t pray with ben anymore. we just say goodnight and then go our separate dreams into our ways.
sometimes he says I love you as a joke
it’s been getting harder to shower every morning.
Nov 15, 2025
Nov 15, 2025 at 12:15 AM UTC
pleiades at dawn -
her perfume lingers, fading
thru the falling leaves
Nov 3, 2025
Nov 3, 2025 at 10:52 AM UTC
trees,
like stalagmites watching
water drip drip drip
falling upwards from the
gazebo as rowan tries his
best to look me in the eye
he thinks there will never be another moment like this
and i think about skipping my 7:30 tomorrow
because there's no way i'm getting 8 hours of sleep;
maybe 6 if i'm lucky
he says sorry
he says thank you
he tells me about what he looks like in the dark,
in the light, in the mirror
he tells me about how he was born, how he is living, and
how he will die.
i tell him i know.
an ant crawls by,
a leaf falls in the forest,
nothing changes.
Oct 23, 2025
Oct 23, 2025 at 1:39 PM UTC
won't be different
you will fix your crooked poster
she will say you're funny,
he will cut in line for lunch
you will trip while walking
you can fight it, you can run
sooner or later you will be alone again
so you climb on your roof and scream
to the moon, that silent son of none:
"it's not my fault
it's not my fault"
he stares back, unforgiving:
"tomorrow will be a new day
you will count the paint marks on the ceiling
he will look at her and smile,
she will call you friend
you will say something wrong
laugh if you want, cry if you must
it makes no difference to me"
he tells you he will come again,
& in all of this, the question lingers:
Sep 23, 2025
Sep 23, 2025 at 1:59 PM UTC
if we close our eyes and i clasp
my hands together really tight, we can
pretend that i’m 7 again
so embarrassed to tell gram that i wet the bed
i smile and nod
through the wetness down my legs
nobody’s home to tuck me in
in a minute i’ll have to get up and take a shower, and then i’ll see
the blood.
every car that’s driving by slows down by our house
the drivers rubberneck into our family room
& peer over the kitchen counter to stare at my naked body,
a fender ****** on route 30
traffic will be backed up for miles
this accident has scars on its arms
this accident has shaky hands
this accident can’t look you in the eye when it says
i’m sorry
in 20 minutes, it’ll all be down the drain
i will send grace pictures
of me when i got my wisdom teeth out
and reassure her that the swelling won’t be that bad
after i clean the knife we can act
like nothing ever happened, until
the next time that i hurt someone
other than myself
Aug 28, 2025
Aug 28, 2025 at 1:46 PM UTC