i thought i had you
so much so that i assumed
i would be lost without you
but i never had you
and now
i can't tell if i'm lost
or if i could ever be lost
when i was never home
in the first place
i wish you would've said something
Oct 7, 2018
Oct 7, 2018 at 9:14 PM UTC
love has left me afraid
barbed wire voices lined with poison lies
nights invested in neglect
realizing monsters are only scared of
apologies
i was happy
for a day
Oct 7, 2018
Oct 7, 2018 at 9:06 PM UTC
the nights alone
and the days with you
are starting to
blend together
i'm trying to find the line
between getting lost in
my mind
and getting lost in
your babbling
i could listen to you
for hours but
can't stand ten minutes
with myself
you make me so happy
and i want to die
Jun 30, 2018
Jun 30, 2018 at 12:09 AM UTC
chewing on barbed wire
falling up the stairs
running out of milk before cereal
wet shoelaces
my dead car battery
spiders in the bed
Feb 24, 2018
Feb 24, 2018 at 1:13 AM UTC
my life,
twenty years bearing
my heart to those who
would repudiate
me as soon as
the chance
surfaced
i wonder if you think
of me
and then i stop wondering
about you
i can no longer love anyone
else more than i
love myself
Nov 21, 2017
Nov 21, 2017 at 2:25 AM UTC
i'm afraid of being
burned alive
i'm afraid of eating
something poisonous
i'm afraid of the dark
and what i can't
see in it
i'm afraid of the light
and the people i've
met under it
i do not live in fear
but fear lives
in me
i am not entirely
in control
but that's not to
say anyone else is
Nov 21, 2017
Nov 21, 2017 at 2:08 AM UTC
when i was younger
i expected to be an adult
by now but mostly
i still feel like a
scared kid
14 wanting to be 16
16 wanting to be 18
19 wanting to be
anything else
everything seemed easier
when it was years away
but now i'm caught in
the middle of my mess
wishing i would have
seen it coming
Sep 21, 2017
Sep 21, 2017 at 1:28 AM UTC
everyday interactions seem
pointless to upkeep
relationships fall apart
because i no longer
feel the need to
empathize
i don't have the capacity to
carry your problems
and mine
Aug 2, 2017
Aug 2, 2017 at 1:56 AM UTC
i woke up today and
i don't love you anymore
your place is not in my heart
your memories are not in my mind
your scent is no longer in my sheets
i woke up today and
being alone felt natural
being alone was motivation
being alone got me out of bed
my life is my own
finally
Jul 25, 2017
Jul 25, 2017 at 11:45 PM UTC
i am learning to live without the love
i thought i'd never have to and
it's only gotten harder.
but, this morning, i got out of bed,
and i did the same yesterday,
and i'll do the same tomorrow.
the hurt i feel will break me
and i will still be standing after.
you will leave
and i will go on.
Mar 27, 2017
Mar 27, 2017 at 8:07 PM UTC