The dream
never dies
the dream never dies
it’s in your mind constantly
always reminding you it’s there
“When are you going to accomplish the dream?”
“Quit being a dreamer.”
the dream isn’t simple
the dream is an obsession
it gives you a purpose in life
it’s also your destruction
if you can’t complete the dream
you’ll die
a failure
lonely and broke
everyone will no you were just a dreamer
dumb
foolish
“I told you so”
you wasted your life.
Mar 30, 2022
Mar 30, 2022 at 3:09 PM UTC
Failed Again
Whatever
Did I try too hard?
Did I not try hard enough?
Did I want it too badly?
Did I not want it badly enough?
Your words of encouragement drive me crazy
Your criticism is making me lose my mind
Winners get some false congratulations from jealous colleagues
Losers have lots of friends
I don’t know what is better
being alone a winner
or going insane
while your friends buy you a couple of drinks to cheer you up
You can either vent or tell them all is fine
it doesn't matter
they aren't really listening
In reality you are the one making them feel better
Apr 29, 2015
Apr 29, 2015 at 1:30 PM UTC
I am home alone
I'ts Saturday night
I can do what I want
I have fantasized about this
No wife
No kids
No friends
No one bothering me.
Why do I feel that no one cares about me.
Why am I sad and depressed
Jan 17, 2015
Jan 17, 2015 at 11:26 PM UTC
I told you no
Look here woman
I told you no
No means no
No
No
I said no
Absolutely not
No
No ******* way
No
I don’t know why
Just stop
I said no
No
No
Because
I said no
No
Never
I won’t
Never
No
I said no
No
Why don’t you listen
No
I don’t want to
I’m not doing it
No
I can’t
I can’t do it
No way
Why
Because
I said so
I said no
When
No
It won’t work
How can i
I don’t see that working
No
No I can’t
Yes
But I can’t
I said yes
But not now
I can’t
No
Maybe
But not now
I can’t
Why can’t you listen
No
When that’s supposed to happen
Look *****
I said no
Okay **** you
I’ll do it
****
****
****
Alright
****
Leave me alone
I said I do it.
What the ****
You Nag!
Jun 19, 2014
Jun 19, 2014 at 4:13 PM UTC
He sits on the bench
Cheering his team on
All the time wondering
When will the coach put him in?
His mom and dad look on smiling at him
He knows they will ask why he didn’t play more?
He doesn’t know himself
He will hear the, “you need to work harder” speech
There is a small chance he will do something great
But not really
He only gets to play
When the team has a comfortable lead
Or a starter needs a rest
Sometimes he gets lucky
A starter will upset the coach
And the coach will punish the starter
By letting him, a sub, play longer than normal
Thoughts confront him
What’s worst?
Not playing?
Fine with not playing?
Not fine with not playing?
Playing a little but playing well?
Playing more but playing bad?
He must break free
He must not let the coach, the team, the parents define him
He can’t be pushed aside
He has to be a fighter
The coach is not his friend
He is the enemy
He must convince himself of this
The coach stands in his way
He must stand out and play the game his way
Not the coach’s way
Or else he will be a sub the rest of his life
And all he will have to show for it
Is a pat on the back and job well done comment
And memories of others getting basking in their own glory
While he sits on the bench
May 9, 2014
May 9, 2014 at 12:53 AM UTC
He told me to **** off.
He said the situation was ********
He gave me the finger
And walked out slamming the door behind him
He is my 11 year old son
He yelled, “What the ****
He told me to get out
And tried to wrestle me out the door of his bedroom
I got the drop on him
Pinned him to the floor
Then he yelled “MOM”
She took my side and screamed at him.
That was my 14 year old.
Both boys swear, say inappropriate things, demand, and act like spoiled brats
I still love them.
But I've had to start lifting weights
I’ve had to start working out
They are getting stronger
I know eventually one of them will take a swing at me.
Some people say beat them
I’ve tried
They keep coming back for more
They like it
My wife defends herself with psychological warfare
The children think she is crazy
and are afraid of her
If ever completely unleashed, the full power of her unpredictable female emotional psyche could take out small city
Leaving many permanently brain dead
She's too humane to torture their young minds for any extended period of time.
I won’t go into the details regarding what she has done to my mind. But think coercion, bribery, guilt, seduction, isolation, etc……
When people say modern family
Divorce, homosexual parents, blended families might come to mind.
Our modern family is a little bit CIA training, little bit UFC, sprinkled with God, Xbox, Disney channel, and Adult Swim.
How did things get this way?
I don’t know
Where is it headed?
It’s all uncharted territory
We’re fighters
I am confident they will make it to adult hood without too many battle scars
In the back my mind I can’t help but wonder what lies ahead?
My oldest starts high school next year
Mar 31, 2014
Mar 31, 2014 at 2:50 PM UTC
Try to be strong as your world crumbles
Try to be strong when no one cares about you anymore
You don’t have anything they want
Try to be strong because they decided you are a waste of time
Try to hang on to your sanity when nothing is going you way
Turn your depression into anger when the few remaining bloodsuckers want what is left of you.
Make them never forget you.
Mar 18, 2014
Mar 18, 2014 at 12:24 PM UTC
I took a week off from work
Nobody knew it
I was there physically
Mentally I was somewhere else
I didn’t plan on going anywhere
My mind just kind of made the arrangements
And sent me on a vacation
My work piled up
and people would call
I would come back from the wherever I was
to answer the phone and
Tell them I was still working on it
They seemed satisfied
I felt guilty for blowing them off
But mind wouldn’t let me go back to work
Instead it sent me to paradise
For a little R&R;
I’m still on vacation right now
I suppose my mind will book my return flight
When it's ready
But for now I just lean back
Close my eyes and drift into
a magical realm of peacefulness
and solitude
Include the paycheck I get at the end to the week
And a little alcohol.
It’s a great vacation.
Feb 14, 2014
Feb 14, 2014 at 2:03 PM UTC
I see her
Again
I searched for her on the internet
I found her
She is naked
Again
Having ***
With different people
Again
Why did I look for her?
What was it about her?
That sparked my interest
Her body is nice from what I can tell
But her smile
Her cheek bones
Here eyes
Friendly looking
And kind
Beautiful long hair
She seems so approachable
I don’t know anything about her
But I want to know everything
This is why I don’t normally look at ****
I see a face of a beautiful person
And I want to know everything about her
So I search
And download
Telling myself I am not a stalker
I am not a pervert
Telling myself I can be her knight in shining armor
I can save her from the life she has chosen
I am not a stalker
I am not a pervert
How long can she last?
In this kind of work
Before she goes crazy
Before she gets used up
How much money does she make?
She has a twitter account
I will never tweet her
I am not a stalker
I am not a pervert
A couple of years go by
I keep following her on the internet
She has changed her body
With plastic surgery
She isn’t the innocent cute
Girl/woman she was
She is still doing this kind of work
Why?
She needs to get out
She doesn’t have much time
She needs to learn a skill to enter the work force
I follow her on twitter
She has wish list on Amazon
She lets her fans buy her things
I want to buy her something
I don’t know why
I won’t
I am not a stalker
I am not a pervert
She is dating a man
Months go by
Now she is dating a woman
Months go by
She is retiring
I am happy
For her
But sad because I won’t see her
Her twitter account is still up
She keeps taking pictures of food
Months go by
Now she is coming out of retirement
Why
She can’t
It’s not healthy
Then I realize
I keep searching for her
On the internet
I’m responsible
For her being in demand
Myself and all her fans
Why do we watch her?
We are sick
Chasing an image that isn’t real
Her name isn’t real
This is a job to her
She needs money
And she needs it from
The pathetic losers that are her fans
This is why she is in this business
For the money
Is so simple
I’m so simple minded
I begin to hate her
I will never buy her anything
Or ever pay for any of her content
I will never tweet her
Or view her again ever
Never
never
I am free
Days go by
I am watching a television show
The actress is beautiful
I search for her on the internet
I want to know everything about her.
Jan 30, 2014
Jan 30, 2014 at 7:05 PM UTC
Defeated
Depleted
Unseated
And cheated
Then deleted
Hired
Admired
Then fired
Now Tired
And Expired
Unchained
Blamed
Explained
Restrained
And shamed
Quiet desperation
Quiet exasperation
Verbal frustration
Mental desolation
Public isolation
**** YOU ALL
Jan 23, 2014
Jan 23, 2014 at 12:35 PM UTC