hello-friends - Hello Poetry

Beauty was bestowed upon me / A golden Crown of self loathing / Replaced By a thorny wraith / Unforgiving Self worth / Slipping Cutting clean / Through my ears The ruby / Sensitive Gum / The welling of red On cracked lips / The raw Pink inside of my cheek / The slight Glisten of fever / Eyes / Forehead The nape of my neck / Swirls Of sheets / Alternating / Crisp and damp Sunsets and shadows / Cast Ant parades / Majestic In their toil / Finding myself Beauty in the very hight / Of senses The senseless sun / Mine For the taking / To use For my own needs / Of the Contrasting and blending/ Of The human consciousness / Of Beauty and pain.

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Dec 18, 2014

Dec 18, 2014 at 3:09 PM UTC

Beauty Was Bestowed

Beauty was bestowed upon me / A golden Crown of self loathing / Replaced By a thorny wraith / Unforgiving Self worth / Slipping Cutting clean / Through my ears The ruby / Sensitive Gum / The welling of red On cracked lips / The raw Pink inside of my cheek / The slight Glisten of fever / Eyes / Forehead The nape of my neck / Swirls Of sheets / Alternating / Crisp and damp Sunsets and shadows / Cast Ant parades / Majestic In their toil / Finding myself Beauty in the very hight / Of senses The senseless sun / Mine For the taking / To use For my own needs / Of the Contrasting and blending/ Of The human consciousness / Of Beauty and pain.

22

It was the kind of night That if you just stay long enough Something miraculous will happen. I was the kind of girl Who always left too soon. But that night, you, Miraculously human, Begged me stay. You were my three year old My own little clingy kid Hanging onto the edge of my skirt while I was on the phone. But that night was one Were the phone call was not More important than you. And so I stayed Humanly miraculous Sane Close by.

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Sep 13, 2014

Sep 13, 2014 at 3:58 PM UTC

Oh, my God.

It was the kind of night That if you just stay long enough Something miraculous will happen. I was the kind of girl Who always left too soon. But that night, you, Miraculously human, Begged me stay. You were my three year old My own little clingy kid Hanging onto the edge of my skirt while I was on the phone. But that night was one Were the phone call was not More important than you. And so I stayed Humanly miraculous Sane Close by.

18

I paint my fingernails A fresh coat of polish I cannot afford a construction Cannot, in this state Fix my life So I repaint myself The tips of my fingers Now a lavish turquoise In hopes that by alienating my fingers I will be able to alienate myself From myself.

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Aug 14, 2014

Aug 14, 2014 at 3:52 AM UTC

Repainting

I paint my fingernails A fresh coat of polish I cannot afford a construction Cannot, in this state Fix my life So I repaint myself The tips of my fingers Now a lavish turquoise In hopes that by alienating my fingers I will be able to alienate myself From myself.

11

Pulling Has become second nature Pulling at strings To make the beings around me Do as I will Gentle Barely felt tugs At the cords of existance Pulling you closer A hand A hug Your shoulder against mine Sitting on the bus Talking on a bench Feeling you close Knowing you're there The doors here I tell you Refuse to be pulled I must place my hands firmly And tilt My weight against them Against my promise To never again Push away.

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Aug 14, 2014

Aug 14, 2014 at 3:42 AM UTC

Doors

Pulling Has become second nature Pulling at strings To make the beings around me Do as I will Gentle Barely felt tugs At the cords of existance Pulling you closer A hand A hug Your shoulder against mine Sitting on the bus Talking on a bench Feeling you close Knowing you're there The doors here I tell you Refuse to be pulled I must place my hands firmly And tilt My weight against them Against my promise To never again Push away.

25

Once upon a time in a land far far away and only now do I understand the recursion, you feel more then just far. In familiar locations Lacking only you I sit and slowly forget.

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Jul 24, 2014

Jul 24, 2014 at 1:44 PM UTC

Far Far Away

Once upon a time in a land far far away and only now do I understand the recursion, you feel more then just far. In familiar locations Lacking only you I sit and slowly forget.

9

My room is scattered With PaperCutPotentials My skin is splitting Just as the thought The never ending battle Of the sword and the pen The ongoing struggle For shelf space The books suffocate My own space and I Am never alone Words trailing me Like ****** fingerprints Everywhere I go Leaving clues For my feeble existence Until the pen loses And I all on my sword.

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Jul 21, 2014

Jul 21, 2014 at 1:54 PM UTC

The Sword and The Pen

My room is scattered With PaperCutPotentials My skin is splitting Just as the thought The never ending battle Of the sword and the pen The ongoing struggle For shelf space The books suffocate My own space and I Am never alone Words trailing me Like ****** fingerprints Everywhere I go Leaving clues For my feeble existence Until the pen loses And I all on my sword.

18

It's so ironic That now we cannot touch I fear you most I can feel you slipping Between my fingers Sand Water Running down I want you here Solid Warm Familiar, following me To rooftops and beaches Keeping me from harm. I try to envision The way it felt Safe Welcome I cannot recreate it. Only your rage Sharp Words And mistrust You could hurt me As long as You are not here To convince me otherwise. When you next come I will not tell you To go away But what once was Will never be the same This is what they call Change and I know It is only my Stupid Worries But I cannot help myself When you are away.

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Jul 21, 2014

Jul 21, 2014 at 1:49 PM UTC

Ironic II

It's so ironic That now we cannot touch I fear you most I can feel you slipping Between my fingers Sand Water Running down I want you here Solid Warm Familiar, following me To rooftops and beaches Keeping me from harm. I try to envision The way it felt Safe Welcome I cannot recreate it. Only your rage Sharp Words And mistrust You could hurt me As long as You are not here To convince me otherwise. When you next come I will not tell you To go away But what once was Will never be the same This is what they call Change and I know It is only my Stupid Worries But I cannot help myself When you are away.

39

I am incredible, look at all that I have accomplished / a satisfied smile flashes at my reflection / anchored / anchoring when all the world is spinning / round and round The balloons where white and popping / always popping disappearing with the loud sound of your voice / almost spoken / but not quite conveyed / through your hands / but no more I am anchoring / anchored I am incredible, look open your eyes and look / I tell myself as I cry myself to sleep.

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Jul 21, 2014

Jul 21, 2014 at 1:32 PM UTC

It Has Been A Year

I am incredible, look at all that I have accomplished / a satisfied smile flashes at my reflection / anchored / anchoring when all the world is spinning / round and round The balloons where white and popping / always popping disappearing with the loud sound of your voice / almost spoken / but not quite conveyed / through your hands / but no more I am anchoring / anchored I am incredible, look open your eyes and look / I tell myself as I cry myself to sleep.

16

He strikes a match and smoke Fills the room Gently spiraling Upwards In drunken swirls of white. The inside of my mouth Tastes sickly sweet Cotton candy And iron,what Have they been feeding me? Forced friendships And forceful Interactions, I look For a means of escape But the florescent lights glint On the collection Of bottles sitting Abandoned On the grand wooden table Catching my eye Catching Me in their trap. Mindless talk And thoughtless comments Create the fabric of our current universe Constellations of blood ties and big Black holes Inescapable.

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Jul 14, 2014

Jul 14, 2014 at 6:01 PM UTC

Trap

He strikes a match and smoke Fills the room Gently spiraling Upwards In drunken swirls of white. The inside of my mouth Tastes sickly sweet Cotton candy And iron,what Have they been feeding me? Forced friendships And forceful Interactions, I look For a means of escape But the florescent lights glint On the collection Of bottles sitting Abandoned On the grand wooden table Catching my eye Catching Me in their trap. Mindless talk And thoughtless comments Create the fabric of our current universe Constellations of blood ties and big Black holes Inescapable.

28

The aluminium folds Under my able fingers As I shape it to my Will My own tin man I did not choose you To be so heartless Your purity lying in The utter Emptyness of your chest And I, being the human I am Constantly unpure and purifying Find comfort in your Sinlessness Your inability to right me No hope rises around you And no shiver runs down my spine At the touch of your cold skin Frictionless No strings able to attach.

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Jun 29, 2014

Jun 29, 2014 at 10:44 AM UTC

H(u/ea)rtless

The aluminium folds Under my able fingers As I shape it to my Will My own tin man I did not choose you To be so heartless Your purity lying in The utter Emptyness of your chest And I, being the human I am Constantly unpure and purifying Find comfort in your Sinlessness Your inability to right me No hope rises around you And no shiver runs down my spine At the touch of your cold skin Frictionless No strings able to attach.

20