I have been haunted these past few nights. Shadows of an uncertain future manifested before me, leaving me a prisoner to my mind.
Fears untold, kept in solitary. Their only company: the lonely echoes of a weary heart beating against its cage.
I daydream of smiles. Of days filled with light and laughter.
I dream of the alter and of you, there, waiting for me. To unite with a kiss; the promise of forever on our lips.
I dream of our home that we’ll build together; a refuge to hideaway from the rest of the world. A world in and of itself. Our world.
I want to conquer that world with you.
But it becomes overshadowed by those very fears that haunt me.
The fears that taint my dreams and rob me of my sleep. The shadows that have made a home underneath my eyes.
My tears begin to make their home there, too.
Jan 27, 2020
Jan 27, 2020 at 9:13 PM UTC
we cast our sins unto others
not noticing how we've long been bathing in a pool of our own mistakes.
the sins of my father
the sins of my mother
their sins are not mine, we say.
but how can we be so certain
when we are so blindly consumed with ego's seductive ways?
perhaps it is not another's grip around your neck.
perhaps, it is your own.
Sep 4, 2019
Sep 4, 2019 at 7:38 PM UTC
I wish I could sleep in peace
Lay my head down and put my mind at ease
But I count wolves instead of sheep
And remind myself of the demons I keep
Twisting and turning
Stomach churning
Questions burning
Anxiety relishes in my defeat
May 19, 2019
May 19, 2019 at 9:31 PM UTC
through clenched teeth and a taut jaw
i tell you i love you
but that love is mired with
your lies,
your tainted lullabies,
your hollowed eyes.
like pulling teeth
and salt on an open wound
your kiss,
your touch,
your embrace
does nothing but bring distaste.
the answer seems clear:
there is no love here
yet i cling to you still.
May 4, 2019
May 4, 2019 at 12:42 PM UTC
i have been starved of you.
i have not eaten in days
yet i am full--
of sadness
of longing
of grief
of pain.
i did not know that heartache could be so filling.
Feb 10, 2019
Feb 10, 2019 at 2:22 PM UTC
remember your anger.
hold onto it and weep.
let each tear that rolls down your cheek
serve as a reminder as a promise to keep.
if not for yourself now,
then for the vision of you later
when fate will be kinder
for all the wicked games it's leeched.
this heartache will not ruin you.
you are more than this.
in time you will stitch your wounds
though now they may bleed.
still your heart beats on, despite.
allow your anger to fuel you.
let its searing warmth radiate
for it is the scorned woman who will prevail
and he who will instead weep.
Feb 5, 2019
Feb 5, 2019 at 10:20 PM UTC
I am a sum.
A sum of tape and glue,
Stiches and staples.
Fragments of a whole,
Broken and unstable.
A prisoner to circumstance.
A victim of the cruel lash of reality.
A slave to couldves and shouldves.
Of dos and donts,
Of haves and have nots,
Of this verses that.
But
I am more.
More than his grip of silence
More than their shadows of doubt.
More than those who rebuked my defiance
More than he who dared to stifle my truth.
No longer a prisoner
No longer a slave
No longer a victim
But a bird free of her cage.
Nov 15, 2018
Nov 15, 2018 at 1:15 AM UTC
A dagger to the heart
Regret forged into its jagged edge
Lodged deep in the chambers
Sorrow seeping with each aching beat.
The fault lies only in the hand that dared plunge the blade.
An act of passion,
A cry of inexplicable pain.
The look of disbelief,
The shadow of guilt, of relief.
Therein lies the heartbreak of a love lost.
As the last tendrils of vitality lose their reign,
In death there is triumph
And disdain.
What sweet sorrow did he bring.
Oct 4, 2018
Oct 4, 2018 at 1:40 AM UTC
she was addicted to the taste of his lips,
for it was the drug that helped quiet her aching soul.
Mar 9, 2018
Mar 9, 2018 at 11:02 PM UTC
the bed feels empty without you
knowing you're wrapped in another's sheets
your arm draped over her still frame
your breath tickling her neck
your heart beating in tune with hers
while the silence blankets me.
you are mine
and you are hers.
you are ours.
caught in this messy equation
sharing your time between my thighs and hers.
locked in my embrace only to extend your arms to her instead.
i am left haunted by the ghost of your touch,
the lingering caress of your lips,
the dusty trail of your tongue.
echoes of a wistful remembrance
shattered by the cruel lace of reality
leaving my body icy where i lay
yet your body is keeping her warm tonight.
Mar 9, 2018
Mar 9, 2018 at 10:57 PM UTC