genevive-louise-sweeney

Heavy head. Heavy hands. Heavy heart. Through my worries it slinks in. My hopes are beaten To a thick dry pulp in my heart. Dully, I sit heavy heavy. Movement is all impossible. I am a marionette with cut strings. Rough and tattered curls. Ripped and torn dress. Stoic, so so stoic, yet searching. Where is the light that once was? Alone in this mire, I shed my tears. Secluded and rotting in self pity. There are no maps, no decisions. I am lost without guidance In this game of life limbo. I don't know when I'll leave. This is my own prison.

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Dec 25, 2010

Dec 25, 2010 at 11:31 PM UTC

Selfish Selflessness

Heavy head. Heavy hands. Heavy heart. Through my worries it slinks in. My hopes are beaten To a thick dry pulp in my heart. Dully, I sit heavy heavy. Movement is all impossible. I am a marionette with cut strings. Rough and tattered curls. Ripped and torn dress. Stoic, so so stoic, yet searching. Where is the light that once was? Alone in this mire, I shed my tears. Secluded and rotting in self pity. There are no maps, no decisions. I am lost without guidance In this game of life limbo. I don't know when I'll leave. This is my own prison.

20

The light's too dim To see your face. Our lives are too grim To see grace. As we go on We learn to know That love is a child You have to let grow You nurture and water With blood and with tears. You slap, slip and swallow Down foolish fears. The world keeps turning, Without us it goes. And into the dark We fall into snow. Cold winter's embrace Will take us away. And all of our sorrows, Rest and stay. Let love seep in To the heart hard and broken, And listen to soft words, That are just barely spoken. As we go on We learn to know That love is a child You have to let grow You nurture and water With blood and with tears. You slap, slip and swallow Down foolish fears.

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Sep 13, 2010

Sep 13, 2010 at 7:52 PM UTC

A Gentle Reminder

The light's too dim To see your face. Our lives are too grim To see grace. As we go on We learn to know That love is a child You have to let grow You nurture and water With blood and with tears. You slap, slip and swallow Down foolish fears. The world keeps turning, Without us it goes. And into the dark We fall into snow. Cold winter's embrace Will take us away. And all of our sorrows, Rest and stay. Let love seep in To the heart hard and broken, And listen to soft words, That are just barely spoken. As we go on We learn to know That love is a child You have to let grow You nurture and water With blood and with tears. You slap, slip and swallow Down foolish fears.

32

The click of the finished record, The shuffling from my rabbit's cage, These sounds make me remember, And then the depression seeps in. You have made me stress and anxious. I am balancing my life on toothpicks Around you and past you. The only truth is what you know. The stubborn lies that you've, Told yourself will bring you Down forever, repeatedly, Until you're drunk with fury at the world. Flames of lost loved ones Will constantly surround you And cage you from the outside Which is the only place you now want. There, in this desperation, You will know why I cried Into your cold chest and tore At your back with tired fingers. You will realize, why I would Constantly writing you pleads. There, I was in your arms, Begging you to please grow. Grow as a human. Become a calm mind. Listen to wisdom. And take joy in life.

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Jul 19, 2010

Jul 19, 2010 at 7:16 AM UTC

Begging.

The click of the finished record, The shuffling from my rabbit's cage, These sounds make me remember, And then the depression seeps in. You have made me stress and anxious. I am balancing my life on toothpicks Around you and past you. The only truth is what you know. The stubborn lies that you've, Told yourself will bring you Down forever, repeatedly, Until you're drunk with fury at the world. Flames of lost loved ones Will constantly surround you And cage you from the outside Which is the only place you now want. There, in this desperation, You will know why I cried Into your cold chest and tore At your back with tired fingers. You will realize, why I would Constantly writing you pleads. There, I was in your arms, Begging you to please grow. Grow as a human. Become a calm mind. Listen to wisdom. And take joy in life.

28

I want to punch the walls. I want to feel the bugs crawl Down from the cracks Over my spine And that sickening fit, It swells up inside, Until it spills over, Screams and cries. "I'll throw you to the curb!" I yelled while tears poured down my eyes. "Just leave me. Just let me die!" "If you can't accept All of my sweet love, Then how could I marry This torture and crime?" And I chased him, Down the dark road, Until I couldn't even See his pale neck. "Good riddance!" Then the rivers poured, My heart bled, And I fell down to my knees. The Earth spun and There in the middle of the road, I wept, and I called To the Heavens and to Hell. "Bring me the love I need! Lords knows! He can tell! I've turned my back on you, And the world for this hate." The rot in my chest, And all the pain that I felt, Was lifted away, There, I watched it melt. It flew from my weeping eyes And torn open heart. The tar and rot danced But I winced seeing it part. That was the key To my joy and my light. Maybe one day, I hoped, Would return my sweet knight.

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Jun 29, 2010

Jun 29, 2010 at 9:21 PM UTC

Reencounter With The Devil

I want to punch the walls. I want to feel the bugs crawl Down from the cracks Over my spine And that sickening fit, It swells up inside, Until it spills over, Screams and cries. "I'll throw you to the curb!" I yelled while tears poured down my eyes. "Just leave me. Just let me die!" "If you can't accept All of my sweet love, Then how could I marry This torture and crime?" And I chased him, Down the dark road, Until I couldn't even See his pale neck. "Good riddance!" Then the rivers poured, My heart bled, And I fell down to my knees. The Earth spun and There in the middle of the road, I wept, and I called To the Heavens and to Hell. "Bring me the love I need! Lords knows! He can tell! I've turned my back on you, And the world for this hate." The rot in my chest, And all the pain that I felt, Was lifted away, There, I watched it melt. It flew from my weeping eyes And torn open heart. The tar and rot danced But I winced seeing it part. That was the key To my joy and my light. Maybe one day, I hoped, Would return my sweet knight.

45

The World does not see you for who you are. The World sees you as naive meat to **** on and bones to crack, Fingers to snap and eyeballs to steep. We are the ingredients of **** stew. The garnish on top are the dreams, The hopes, the high stars, and the shine. We are the slaves to the Fathers. Turning the wheel and choking on bread, We are the broken and hopeless. Never run, never feel the sun. There's no white beginning. Stuck in the sidewalk cracks Under old Rots' heels and toes, We will wilt like weeds growing In the grunge of crumbling cities. So to calm our tears and abide our fears, We lift a bottle to cheer and fate. Pop a pill to escape our hate And bring a daze of past worlds. There, in our crevices and rifts, Our molded eyes will mar all future Like all we've been taught to uphold Will decay, façades will melt away. Eventually, there will be no chains. There will be no choking. There will be no greed or want. Blood will never flow and hate will have no go. There will be no rust. There will be no spoiled. This world will be a pasture With rivers of milk and honey.

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Jun 14, 2010

Jun 14, 2010 at 8:40 AM UTC

A Binge on Adolescence

The World does not see you for who you are. The World sees you as naive meat to **** on and bones to crack, Fingers to snap and eyeballs to steep. We are the ingredients of **** stew. The garnish on top are the dreams, The hopes, the high stars, and the shine. We are the slaves to the Fathers. Turning the wheel and choking on bread, We are the broken and hopeless. Never run, never feel the sun. There's no white beginning. Stuck in the sidewalk cracks Under old Rots' heels and toes, We will wilt like weeds growing In the grunge of crumbling cities. So to calm our tears and abide our fears, We lift a bottle to cheer and fate. Pop a pill to escape our hate And bring a daze of past worlds. There, in our crevices and rifts, Our molded eyes will mar all future Like all we've been taught to uphold Will decay, façades will melt away. Eventually, there will be no chains. There will be no choking. There will be no greed or want. Blood will never flow and hate will have no go. There will be no rust. There will be no spoiled. This world will be a pasture With rivers of milk and honey.

32

...Everthing to do Anything. I don't want to budge. I don't want to care, But everyone is Pushing me there. "Won't you just Give a **** They cry to me. I can hear it, Growling beneath their hearts. "Nope." For once this is my life, And I decide to give a **** When I **** well please.

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Jun 5, 2010

Jun 5, 2010 at 4:02 PM UTC

Lack of...

...Everthing to do Anything. I don't want to budge. I don't want to care, But everyone is Pushing me there. "Won't you just Give a **** They cry to me. I can hear it, Growling beneath their hearts. "Nope." For once this is my life, And I decide to give a **** When I **** well please.

16

Dropping, hitting, clunking, Like a stone falling into the stomach. All day long, it jumps and sinks. Your indifference stings Worse than my blisters, And worse than your hate. And like a child, I cling to your side And look in your eyes. I am searching for love, And acceptance, But all I see is a blur. All you show me Is your disgust, And all I feel is sorrow. Why do I remain attached? Love is the lock To these gagging binds. Everything I do is gross to you. My whole existence is gross to you. "Mostly."

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Apr 7, 2010

Apr 7, 2010 at 8:38 PM UTC

"Mostly."

Dropping, hitting, clunking, Like a stone falling into the stomach. All day long, it jumps and sinks. Your indifference stings Worse than my blisters, And worse than your hate. And like a child, I cling to your side And look in your eyes. I am searching for love, And acceptance, But all I see is a blur. All you show me Is your disgust, And all I feel is sorrow. Why do I remain attached? Love is the lock To these gagging binds. Everything I do is gross to you. My whole existence is gross to you. "Mostly."

22

Bitter tea, sour lips. There it is, Sitting in your mouth, And you take the leap, And you swallow it down. And now you're abusing. You're trying to wash away, The pain and regret, But all it will ever do, Is add a masked layer. There, on the floor, Lying naked and torn, Your body turns into sun, But the ache is still there, Rotting your teeth and brain. There is no escape, Face the pain. "I want to hide!" You cry. "I want to disappear." "How can I go on? Living like this here. All I feel is sickness, And the disgust, That you cry." I swear that I love you, And that I never lie.

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Apr 7, 2010

Apr 7, 2010 at 6:35 PM UTC

Swallowing.

Bitter tea, sour lips. There it is, Sitting in your mouth, And you take the leap, And you swallow it down. And now you're abusing. You're trying to wash away, The pain and regret, But all it will ever do, Is add a masked layer. There, on the floor, Lying naked and torn, Your body turns into sun, But the ache is still there, Rotting your teeth and brain. There is no escape, Face the pain. "I want to hide!" You cry. "I want to disappear." "How can I go on? Living like this here. All I feel is sickness, And the disgust, That you cry." I swear that I love you, And that I never lie.

27

I am too far away. Floating above you. Away from you. Never have I held a hand. Never have I felt love. There's a difference. Unspoken and alien. I cannot look. Your eyes burn. My breath smells. It keeps you at length You haven't really kissed me. No one plays with my hair. No one caresses my face. No one holds my body. A young child playing by herself. Forever stuck in herself. Forever apart from friends. Never loving. Never affectionate. Never there. You will never hold my hand. You will never hold my heart.

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Mar 29, 2010

Mar 29, 2010 at 10:46 PM UTC

You Will Never Hold My Hand

I am too far away. Floating above you. Away from you. Never have I held a hand. Never have I felt love. There's a difference. Unspoken and alien. I cannot look. Your eyes burn. My breath smells. It keeps you at length You haven't really kissed me. No one plays with my hair. No one caresses my face. No one holds my body. A young child playing by herself. Forever stuck in herself. Forever apart from friends. Never loving. Never affectionate. Never there. You will never hold my hand. You will never hold my heart.

23

The sunflowers are yanked from my grasp. The only spot of sunlight I see, Is through the slivers of your finger cracks. I am choked and dragged below, To this dank tunnel. Countless times do I find myself, Crawling through this thick mud, Escaping from the gollum, Ring in hand and throat intact, I run through the forest. These trees know my path and struggle. They sway and change my vision. Thick bows and strands of their leafy vines, Slap against my back like the whips Of condemnation. I am free, But this time, Full of the aches of your pain, Inflicted through my body, Telling of my immanent captures.

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Mar 21, 2010

Mar 21, 2010 at 1:11 PM UTC

Consent

The sunflowers are yanked from my grasp. The only spot of sunlight I see, Is through the slivers of your finger cracks. I am choked and dragged below, To this dank tunnel. Countless times do I find myself, Crawling through this thick mud, Escaping from the gollum, Ring in hand and throat intact, I run through the forest. These trees know my path and struggle. They sway and change my vision. Thick bows and strands of their leafy vines, Slap against my back like the whips Of condemnation. I am free, But this time, Full of the aches of your pain, Inflicted through my body, Telling of my immanent captures.

20