Hotel rooms are to small for two people who hate each other.
I'll sit outside till dad gets back since this is where he choose to stay.
I watch after the rain stops, mesmerized as rain drops drop from rooftops and people drive by I'm sitting on painted cement sidewalks trying to keep dry.
Thunder crashes but not as hard as I'm crashing through life
I'm 17 has no clue what life means, 5 foot 3, curly hair, stuck in between, over dramatic drama queen I'm getting anxiety when the phone rings so I stop picking up and they stop calling.
Jun 30, 2015
Jun 30, 2015 at 3:42 PM UTC
Some days I do believe she had a halo
But best friends are harder to come by, ya know?
She was my ride or die
My safe place when I needed to hide
A lock box of secrets for me to confide
A hand to hold and a shoulder to cry.
But she stays loyal to who she's around the most
Weekend plans change now that summer is here
And I'm moving out of state.
But I won't forget last winter,
When we got to live,
I always got to see her smile and her halo would glow and it would make flowers bloom in the deepest parts of my stomach, she knew how to make you feel like the freshest spring air.
I'll try to get through summer without her.
Jun 30, 2015
Jun 30, 2015 at 3:38 PM UTC
I have never had a garage until this year
I store everything from my pain to my wardrobe
last night I screamed at the cement walls
stared out the window like someone was coming to get me
I feel disconnected in there
I keep myself in that garage wishing I could tape myself away in a cardboard box next to everything else no one wants to open
I would be out of the way, hardly taking up space
wouldn't that be great.
but instead ill spend another night screaming at walls that wont break
they aren't as fragile as I am today.
garage sundress
open bottles, not to confess
problems I don't want to address
im kind of a loud mistake
.
May 4, 2015
May 4, 2015 at 4:48 PM UTC
do you still love her?
you guys have been together over a year
and for the past months I've kind of interfered
do you really like me?
I mean I don't like me so its hard to see
May 4, 2015
May 4, 2015 at 4:44 PM UTC
sometimes you cry because you're tired
sometimes you break because you're exhausted
some days no one understands, so its 3:43 pm
i think i might just go to bed
my hopes are too high and my eyes are to low
tear stained cheeks tye dye shirts that don't belong to me
i might just leave
May 3, 2015
May 3, 2015 at 3:45 PM UTC
dear noni,
im suppose to call you nona
i just didnt know how to pronounce the "a"
your not even italian so what does it matter anyway
i dont like you very much
you have made my life harder than it should be
dear noni i really wish you would leave
you raised a homophobic judgmental son, i get to call him dad
thanks.
dear noni
youre not very friendly
you can send me as many books as you want on jesus and being straight'
it doesnt help your case
stop "praying for me it makes you look bad
sorry you are my grandma because i dont like you
May 1, 2015
May 1, 2015 at 11:36 AM UTC
dec 30 97
a bad seed was planted
ever since then she has sprouted and she grows
she doesn't get the nutrients she needs so she wilts away behind the scenes
Apr 30, 2015
Apr 30, 2015 at 10:28 PM UTC
she told me i make her not know what to do with herself
i told her i know what to do with her
id tell her she was worth it every day
and id eat her out then make coffee and eat breakfast because who could argue with eating twice.
id rub her feet and tell her that her smile reminds me of sunshine
id talk about stars until there was none left in the sky.
i would hold her when it rains and we would discuss who is up there crying.
i would stop picking flowers because she thinks that they shouldn't die yet.
i would kiss her and buy her fossils because she loves that ****
i would stop smoking cigarettes because she is so clean and who really wants to kiss a ashtray.
i would write her sweet poems and decorate the front with turtles because we picked Spanish names together.
i would kick someone's *** if they crossed her wrong.
i would undress so she didn't have to do it because i know some days are too long.
i would do everything to make her happy.
i would plant us strawberries and we could have cats.
i would never hurt her.
Apr 28, 2015
Apr 28, 2015 at 10:25 PM UTC
we apologized for stubbing our toes and crying to late at night
not knowing we were so small in this big picture
our parents called us unique. one in a million.
youre not special
im not special
Apr 28, 2015
Apr 28, 2015 at 10:08 PM UTC
ive never had anything but a one stand
I don't even understand how its easy to give yourself to people who will say anything then leave.
I know how these things work.
affection and attention, slight attraction
sometimes cause a ********
my feet hurt and im tired of leaving before they wake up.
I hold my pride like I want them to hold me
its easier to give in than it is to give up.
im a impatient little ****
so ill kick my shoes off
take some shots and pretend like I cant feel this because this isn't feeling its slightly dying.
my feet hurt and im tired of one night stands but ill be gone by morning.
Apr 28, 2015
Apr 28, 2015 at 9:35 PM UTC