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fertileblogger
fertileblogger
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the fog grew thick and the clearest sound I could recognize was your Voice. I haven’t driven by this god- forsaken place in weeks, but it’s always a warm welcome. instead of being ordered to stay here, I have the power to visit – on my own free will. the silk sounds of your Voice give me the strength to communicate the exact visions in my mind, where my tongue tends to slip. you take a shovel through the dirt and grime that fills this lot that once was an intricate maze, Walls covered in vibrant green vines. And I tried for years to stop you from watering those Walls – trying to prove to you that these prison-concrete Walls were just that. Walls that make you clutch your throat and gasp for air. what I didn’t realize was how lovely it could be to walk hand in hand with your one true love surrounded by over-grown vines until this warranted reunion. – what it’s like to be in harmony w/ your subconscious
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Feb 22, 2018
Feb 22, 2018 at 6:30 PM UTC
merging
The walls you signed your life away to were never thick enough to seize your Tone of condescension aimed at the woman that I needed to draw strength from. Your Roar echoes, vibrating through my Vocal Chords to the point that I can’t reel back the sharp hooks I continuously sink into my lover’s back. Maybe it’s you I should blame For letting my first “love” wrap his sorry hands around my Throat, lips black blue Red For convincing my adolescent self that the Chatter of a girl was nothing but White Noise, that my comfort lied in the Dialect of teenage boys For believing that I could never find comfort in the Words of a woman – your copious Lectures filled with disdain and the only Words I can ever recall were the ones she never Said As if a woman’s Voice were most valuable when Silent.
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Jan 18, 2018
Jan 18, 2018 at 9:25 PM UTC
searching for myself, pt. 1
Somehow, it convinces you to swallow a constant flow of molten tar, soon to blacken the pink matter that resides in you, eventually oozing through the pores of your paper-thin skin – and once you finally unlock your jaws to scream, The ones you thought would save you shove it back down your throat with laughter.
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Jan 18, 2018
Jan 18, 2018 at 9:22 PM UTC
depression
I'm sitting here at my window, gazing up at the sky's beauty after rain pour, and how the moon illuminates the clouds like a night light. And suddenly I'm okay with the storm that's been roaring in my head, it's all come to an end. People are like clouds - there for the storm, and gone once it's passed. But the moon in my sky has and always will be there to bring light to my darkest days.
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Sep 9, 2014
Sep 9, 2014 at 1:57 AM UTC
september 7th, 2014
summer lost in all of you, and how lovely it is to not be found gone is the silence, for my heart beats clear and sound summer lost in all of you, and in your eyes - a compass exploration into your deep abyss, a beauty so bright and fathomless summer lost in all of you, and loving you holds no description of escape consider it natural, or humanly innate you see, a summer without you is a fiery season, and all the others - the same with no reason with you, every day is summer's eve and if you gaze beyond the trees, you'll catch a road built, for the journey of you and me
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Sep 9, 2014
Sep 9, 2014 at 1:52 AM UTC
Summer Lost in All of You
lips pressed, long drag if it was anyone else, I’d step aside, look away. chest raises, you take another my eyes see your interior - smoke travels quickly… breathe in, breathe out why can I see the residue in the cavity of your lungs? lips pressed, chest raised why am I the one who feels light-headed? I watch you fill your lungs with the opposite of life, and all I want is for yours to last longer than mine.
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Jul 9, 2014
Jul 9, 2014 at 4:59 AM UTC
please understand.
In a city full of tall buildings and unspeakable views, breathtaking unknowns and unfamiliar faces, there are those sitting on window sills chugging bottles of brew, leaving cigarette traces She spends her days in a haze, sharing little laughs that make her ribs ache, all in attempt to erase you It's only then she sees, an imprint on the soul is the kind of stain that can't be scrubbed
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Apr 7, 2014
Apr 7, 2014 at 3:09 AM UTC
Beer Bottles and Cigarette Ashes
If I could, I'd grab hold of all the memories and feelings I have for you out of my soul and throw them into the night sky and as a result, they'd fill the galaxy with more stars - a beauty only to be gazed upon, but not felt. What kind of love doesn't hurt so bad? It’s far from a heartache; my whole body trembles and shivers at the cold winds of missing you.
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Mar 31, 2014
Mar 31, 2014 at 3:43 AM UTC
Fluster
The first love; so deep the ocean filled with envy. Its vastness and mystery had me venture off so fathomless, there was no point of return. A love so vast, the tides couldn't pull me back to the shores of normality. Yet, the deeper I swam in the sea of utopia, the stronger the storm rode in, tossing me back to a solitary world of black and white. The rough landing - leaving scrapes on my wrists and gashes in my chest. Back to black and white - the simple reality that love compels you so far deep into bliss, you'll never see the storm’s rage from afar. That first love is casted deep into oblivion, and sinks quickly to the bottomless abyss, only to reel me back into the absoluteness that you were never ready to sink with me.
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Mar 31, 2014
Mar 31, 2014 at 3:40 AM UTC
Hook, Line, and Sinker
Once the sun decided to stay awhile, the locks melted away, and no longer would I crave you — face pushed between the bars. You held me for the first time, no restrictions between you and me. And I dug my face in your embrace, in order to find your heart. The gates swung wide as we danced, under the sun, under the stars, and time was non-existent. Were there really ever bars? Traveling through time, you finally looked at the clock. The season ended, the bars re-locked. I long for you for eternity it seems. Forever I wait at the gates, in hopes for your return.
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Mar 31, 2014
Mar 31, 2014 at 3:09 AM UTC
Between the Bars