You swore that I could trust you, but it wasn't something I could hold
Promising your presence, and yet I walked a lonely road
Offering pieces of the puzzle, that were never quite enough
With one foot out the door, you said don't ask me for too much
You became complacent, considered us a guarantee
A half full kind of love, you saw as my remedy
The hero in your story, knowing you could tame me when you tried
Expecting I was gracious, you held your head up high
Now with hindsight in your corner and nostalgia a friend
You claim you've learned your lesson, your old self you do transcend
Though you're seeking recognition and praise for all your change
I sense that inside lurking, is a monster barely caged
Oct 30, 2023
Oct 30, 2023 at 10:25 AM UTC
I am tired now mum...
Before you died you promised I would be okay...
For you I have tried,
But without you here, not even perfect can satisfy my desire to make you proud
I wear breaking point like a gold star,
I have torn myself down so much,
That optimism feels like self indulgence
And after all this, I still feel like I have failed you
Feb 20, 2019
Feb 20, 2019 at 5:50 AM UTC
I would give up my future, for one more minute with you
I would reach inside myself and tear my necrotic heart from its self pitying home,
I would throw the last fragments of my confidence into the breeze,
I would finally succumb to the darkness that whispers to me
Because I miss you so much, that the option of survival makes me sick
Feb 20, 2019
Feb 20, 2019 at 5:41 AM UTC
On days like this... I want to submit and take the prescribed pills,
To resurface from my own created ocean of pessimism
To have the sunlight feel like a blessing instead of a curse
I want to feel like the one who can,
Or perhaps I just want an answer to the question
"Whats wrong?"
Feb 20, 2019
Feb 20, 2019 at 5:32 AM UTC
Everyone has secrets,
Me... well I will push myself to breaking point
Until I am sure I have done everything to make my mother proud of me
And then I will break
Enough to make shiny knifes look perfect against my skin
Mar 21, 2018
Mar 21, 2018 at 9:55 PM UTC
Subtle steps towards the depth,
The darkness lies in wait,
It lures you with shiny things,
And tortures you like bait
Your fears it will feed upon
It likes you sick and frail,
You wonder when you got so small
Your skin now stretched and pale
But daylight it shall come again
Just like the times before,
Hold tight onto catastrophe
And try to brave the war
Mar 21, 2018
Mar 21, 2018 at 11:08 AM UTC
I am no hero,
Myself I won't save
In dawn's early hours
I arrive at my grave
Waiting he sits there
He knew I would come
He offers me flowers
And yet I don't run
My coffin it beckons
Who am I to resist
I am a shadow at best
Who barely exists
Mar 21, 2018
Mar 21, 2018 at 10:41 AM UTC
Hello stranger,
Let me introduce myself, I am the person who may be oceans away,
Or I could be closer than you think...
You deserve wonderful things, so here I am, sending love and light to you!
May your dreams be fulfilled, your smile shining and your day beautiful <3
Oct 31, 2017
Oct 31, 2017 at 2:46 PM UTC
I try to imagine myself as warrior, as fierce, wild and free
Yet some days the tremors grip me and I am left sailing an open ocean while lying under covers
Salty waves harass my body, my open wounds hiss
Yet it is my teardrops that may drown me
Oct 31, 2017
Oct 31, 2017 at 2:41 PM UTC
Then I was thinking about you and how you paint my life every colour imaginable,
that you make me feel like the moment when you're running and its effortless and you swear if you ran a little faster you could fly,
you make me smile like suddenly there is a sky of fireflies and their glow is lighting up the whole word,
you make me ache when I am not with you, feel whole when I am and I know that each snowflake is different but you are a snowflake all of your own, not pale or white, you glow and I know when you look at me everything is on show, like suddenly I am a personal library for your viewing only and you are reading every book I have ever owned... and that... well it's terrifying
Oct 28, 2017
Oct 28, 2017 at 5:22 AM UTC