douglas-harrison - Hello Poetry

The sun must be very lonely The moon has all the stars of the night sky for company I have much in common with the sun The sun has to rise everyday all alone Shine bright so not as to show its weakness Pouring out endless waves of warmth and light An instigator of growth and life Always in someone’s eye craving attention Some people can’t handle our intensity We are too bright People celebrate as the sun leaves the party and gives way to the moon People curse to see us in the morning, always too soon Always too excited to be here They don’t want us to go but never seem happy that we show up or stay.

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Oct 18, 2019

Oct 18, 2019 at 3:36 PM UTC

Disciple of the Sun

The sun must be very lonely The moon has all the stars of the night sky for company I have much in common with the sun The sun has to rise everyday all alone Shine bright so not as to show its weakness Pouring out endless waves of warmth and light An instigator of growth and life Always in someone’s eye craving attention Some people can’t handle our intensity We are too bright People celebrate as the sun leaves the party and gives way to the moon People curse to see us in the morning, always too soon Always too excited to be here They don’t want us to go but never seem happy that we show up or stay.

14

Physically being alone is just a toothache A dull reminder that something is missing, or that something is lost Realizing that you have no one to share your day with No one to tell your hopes and dreams Even on our greatest days where we have found within ourselves the kerosene to brighten our flame and chase away the dark Our toothache flares and finally we feel the buckshot that is mentally, spiritually and totally alone It invades like an infection creeping through our muscles until bed becomes a form of open casket Rotting away our heart and soul until finally our optic nerve gets reached This cancerous emotion erodes our sight and stops us from seeing the light outside ourselves We stumble in our new found dark As our brain is corrupted we reach these dark hallucinations that if there is no one to share our good day with then what is the point of having good days at all Before we know it our bodies are no longer our own, we feel unsettled in our own skin. Not even our own company is enough

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Oct 6, 2019

Oct 6, 2019 at 10:36 AM UTC

Stage 4

Physically being alone is just a toothache A dull reminder that something is missing, or that something is lost Realizing that you have no one to share your day with No one to tell your hopes and dreams Even on our greatest days where we have found within ourselves the kerosene to brighten our flame and chase away the dark Our toothache flares and finally we feel the buckshot that is mentally, spiritually and totally alone It invades like an infection creeping through our muscles until bed becomes a form of open casket Rotting away our heart and soul until finally our optic nerve gets reached This cancerous emotion erodes our sight and stops us from seeing the light outside ourselves We stumble in our new found dark As our brain is corrupted we reach these dark hallucinations that if there is no one to share our good day with then what is the point of having good days at all Before we know it our bodies are no longer our own, we feel unsettled in our own skin. Not even our own company is enough

13

Having no one is a double edged sword You really start to live for yourself Living for yourself is great until you have no one to tell all the amazing things you have been doing Like having a bag of Cheetos and a bottle of wine for dinner The fun *** cocktail of wine and sleeping pills to sleep your off days away Grocery trips are now TV dinners and wine because you have no one to impress Off days are too quiet now I still check my phone way too many times Each time finding comfort and pain at the blank screen No new notifications I know what to expect from each day now Everything I want but nothing I need.

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Jul 6, 2019

Jul 6, 2019 at 6:21 PM UTC

Independence

Having no one is a double edged sword You really start to live for yourself Living for yourself is great until you have no one to tell all the amazing things you have been doing Like having a bag of Cheetos and a bottle of wine for dinner The fun *** cocktail of wine and sleeping pills to sleep your off days away Grocery trips are now TV dinners and wine because you have no one to impress Off days are too quiet now I still check my phone way too many times Each time finding comfort and pain at the blank screen No new notifications I know what to expect from each day now Everything I want but nothing I need.

12

People say they get it but I’m skeptical It consumes everything All the drugs, the alcohol, the people Everything I use to fill this void is never enough It’s like an emotional tape worm We eat and eat and rip chunks of flesh with our teeth and it still wants more I started taking pictures of the fireworks to show you the view from my apartment until I realized you don’t care to see them I had you in my life for 17 years for you to get mad at me for not telling you something For that to be the straw that broke the camels back Everything that I used to bring joy to my day is gone When you don’t have anyone to tell your day to then why bother to have a good day If it doesn’t really matter then today can be like yesterday and the day before Silent.

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Jul 6, 2019

Jul 6, 2019 at 6:20 PM UTC

Infection

People say they get it but I’m skeptical It consumes everything All the drugs, the alcohol, the people Everything I use to fill this void is never enough It’s like an emotional tape worm We eat and eat and rip chunks of flesh with our teeth and it still wants more I started taking pictures of the fireworks to show you the view from my apartment until I realized you don’t care to see them I had you in my life for 17 years for you to get mad at me for not telling you something For that to be the straw that broke the camels back Everything that I used to bring joy to my day is gone When you don’t have anyone to tell your day to then why bother to have a good day If it doesn’t really matter then today can be like yesterday and the day before Silent.

13

Your profile doesn’t have a picture but you have been good conversation Working retail has reinforced the mindset that people are snowflakes in all shapes and sizes This doesn’t help me, I literally have no idea what you could look like Or if you are even a person What if I’m chatting with a scientifically enhanced hamster If some Lovecraftian being is mingling with me through the cosmos I asked for a pic 5 minutes ago and the outlandish ideas above have humored me until you replied Do I read it and force the universe to give me an answer Do I delete this whole app and live my life never knowing for certain What if you say no Then it must be some tentacled being wishing to unravel my very being If only they knew that if left to my own devices I’ll do that on my own I got the pic and now as predicted I unravel myself Why would you like me Why would you think I’m cute How in the world would you find me worthwhile You have a college hoodie on and it only serves to remind me that I am still in my rut no matter how good things have been going recently You are the breath of spring and the other shoe at the same time I guess I’ll keep typing, I’m glad at least the void has a face now

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Apr 4, 2019

Apr 4, 2019 at 10:12 PM UTC

Typing into the void

Your profile doesn’t have a picture but you have been good conversation Working retail has reinforced the mindset that people are snowflakes in all shapes and sizes This doesn’t help me, I literally have no idea what you could look like Or if you are even a person What if I’m chatting with a scientifically enhanced hamster If some Lovecraftian being is mingling with me through the cosmos I asked for a pic 5 minutes ago and the outlandish ideas above have humored me until you replied Do I read it and force the universe to give me an answer Do I delete this whole app and live my life never knowing for certain What if you say no Then it must be some tentacled being wishing to unravel my very being If only they knew that if left to my own devices I’ll do that on my own I got the pic and now as predicted I unravel myself Why would you like me Why would you think I’m cute How in the world would you find me worthwhile You have a college hoodie on and it only serves to remind me that I am still in my rut no matter how good things have been going recently You are the breath of spring and the other shoe at the same time I guess I’ll keep typing, I’m glad at least the void has a face now

19

Someone once told me they hated my imagination My imagination is one of my favorite things about me how disparaging and dark can their world be without even a drop of magic The power of what if and miracles It does happen Magic, luck, whatever the **** you have to call it It happens. When we really need help we get it most times gotta save some magic for everyone else

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Mar 22, 2019

Mar 22, 2019 at 8:53 PM UTC

Imagine

Someone once told me they hated my imagination My imagination is one of my favorite things about me how disparaging and dark can their world be without even a drop of magic The power of what if and miracles It does happen Magic, luck, whatever the **** you have to call it It happens. When we really need help we get it most times gotta save some magic for everyone else

10

I had hoped for so much more for myself I had dreams and plans and confidence I can only hold my breath for so long I’m tired of fighting the current I’m tired of constant struggle I’m tired of self doubt I’m tired of being I’m tired of me I’m so tired Of being Tired Tired is time Tired is time spent smiling Tired is time spent laughing Tired is time spent adventuring So with a yawn and a coffee I keep going

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Jan 6, 2019

Jan 6, 2019 at 12:49 AM UTC

Sleep deprivation

I had hoped for so much more for myself I had dreams and plans and confidence I can only hold my breath for so long I’m tired of fighting the current I’m tired of constant struggle I’m tired of self doubt I’m tired of being I’m tired of me I’m so tired Of being Tired Tired is time Tired is time spent smiling Tired is time spent laughing Tired is time spent adventuring So with a yawn and a coffee I keep going

16

I have a pit in my stomach that feels like a fist Just squeezing tighter and tighter Tomorrow everything could change Even if it stays the same it’s only for a matter of time I’ve been waiting years for this moment and I know I should be excited but I feel like I’m letting a lot go I’m going to miss the conversations during the car rides I know you hate picking me up and dropping me off I loved the time spent together I will gain the world tomorrow but to me it will be at the loss of a treasure

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Dec 30, 2018

Dec 30, 2018 at 9:10 AM UTC

Clenched Diaphragm

I have a pit in my stomach that feels like a fist Just squeezing tighter and tighter Tomorrow everything could change Even if it stays the same it’s only for a matter of time I’ve been waiting years for this moment and I know I should be excited but I feel like I’m letting a lot go I’m going to miss the conversations during the car rides I know you hate picking me up and dropping me off I loved the time spent together I will gain the world tomorrow but to me it will be at the loss of a treasure

9

Congratulations you found some brush and twigs to make a fire You thought it was difficult enough to make the fire but keeping it lit is the real work Cold winds dance and sing through the night sky Doubt It comes from the expected and unexpected, it tries to take your light Your passion, struggle, fight Sometimes we let them win We can’t help it Our fire goes out Those who are brave enough throw themselves into the fire Abandon all kindling and wear your flame Let your passion consume you Persevere Let the fire spread Make the stars look at you in envy.

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Dec 29, 2018

Dec 29, 2018 at 11:35 AM UTC

Kindling

Congratulations you found some brush and twigs to make a fire You thought it was difficult enough to make the fire but keeping it lit is the real work Cold winds dance and sing through the night sky Doubt It comes from the expected and unexpected, it tries to take your light Your passion, struggle, fight Sometimes we let them win We can’t help it Our fire goes out Those who are brave enough throw themselves into the fire Abandon all kindling and wear your flame Let your passion consume you Persevere Let the fire spread Make the stars look at you in envy.

15

Work to me feels like a production Our slate wipes clean each day We set the stage, we preform our lines We check our numbers to make sure we are living up to the company standard We reset the stage and acts to be ready for the next performance, tomorrow We are numbers on someone’s report in someones office that I don’t know They look at that number and decide they know us They can see the sweat blood and tears They can see the cups of coffee and bag of chips for lunch They can see the tired frustration creeping in like the chill in the air The countless hours spent digging deeper to get the show on the road.

0

Dec 15, 2018

Dec 15, 2018 at 6:25 AM UTC

Rabbit hole

Work to me feels like a production Our slate wipes clean each day We set the stage, we preform our lines We check our numbers to make sure we are living up to the company standard We reset the stage and acts to be ready for the next performance, tomorrow We are numbers on someone’s report in someones office that I don’t know They look at that number and decide they know us They can see the sweat blood and tears They can see the cups of coffee and bag of chips for lunch They can see the tired frustration creeping in like the chill in the air The countless hours spent digging deeper to get the show on the road.

11