caffeine crutch
restless midnight rush
memorize words to pinpoint precision
leaning on a coffee cup
fuel for cognitive ignition
unproductive nocturnal emission
of restless sighs
and tears from tired eyes
mesmerized
hypnotized
out of mind
passing time
dreary dreamer
2am alpha wave fighter
front line gunner
of disappointment in the making
time wasting
consciousness fading
daylight breaking
clock resetting
Oct 27, 2016
Oct 27, 2016 at 12:39 PM UTC
*I'll soon forget the color of your eyes
But your name is still burned in my throat
And I'm wide awake, trying to drown it away
With words and whiskey*
May 31, 2016
May 31, 2016 at 12:05 PM UTC
Stay a while, just a little while longer
let me just retrace your face with my eyes
I'll memorize your sunlight gaze, I'll take a picture
Cause wherever you go is wherever I won't
And whenever I say, it's not that you don't
I just want you to stay, stay, stay
And every day that passes, my anchors get heavier
And whenever the wind blows, it doesn't lead me to you
I whenever I breathe, I can never breathe you in
So stay a while, I'll just take your picture
Every little detail, I'll scar on my walls
It will never be better than what's in front of me now
And by the time you read this, it's already too late
You're already gone and no, I'm okay
But it would be better to stay, stay, stay
And I'm trapped inside these words and pages
I've found that feelings don't go, they attach
And so wherever you are, I'll write about you
And I say no I'm okay just like the moon says
No, I don't want a brand new day
Dear, I say no because you never said yes
May 20, 2016
May 20, 2016 at 4:38 PM UTC
Dear, you are love
You are hopeless moments
You are sweet nothings
You are empty stares
You are emotional fatigue
You are physical disinterest
You are indifference
My dear, you are love.
Sep 7, 2015
Sep 7, 2015 at 11:16 AM UTC
Oh moon, take me with you
Take me with you
To another place
So this night won't end
Oh moon, take me away
Take me away
To a place where time stands still
And so does the beating of my heart
Oh moon, take me to you
Take me to you
Where your calm is suffocating
Strangling life from tired eyes
Oh moon, take me
Take me
May 3, 2015
May 3, 2015 at 9:40 AM UTC
I've made a mistake I cannot undo
That is, my dear, to fall hard for you
Even though what my chest screams is true
He found you first, he loves you too
Feb 5, 2015
Feb 5, 2015 at 5:39 PM UTC
I am a structure, hastily built
Cemented within my chest, the weight of the world
Burdens of nations, plastered on my shoulders
My base starts to move
How long til I crumble
Jan 18, 2015
Jan 18, 2015 at 9:20 AM UTC
Maybe I should just stop this
Hours on end, waiting
Everytime I tell myself to stop
You come back to life in vivid detail
Every smile from your lips
Every glorious moment of your laughter
All the joy, all the love, all the pain
Comes back
Open doors lead to dead ends
So maybe I should just stop this
Dec 13, 2014
Dec 13, 2014 at 11:02 AM UTC
Glittered eyes and plastered smiles
Sloven signs of plastic lies
Under masks you call your home
Lies the heart I'll never hold
Truths to you, you'll never spill
Maybe so, I love you still
Nov 15, 2014
Nov 15, 2014 at 10:55 AM UTC
To: R
I want you to know that the way I feel for you is too great to be able to put in words
I want you to know that what you are to me is far more than just a love
No, you're more than that
I want you to know that I'm drowning in a pool of emotions, and it's all for you, only you, always you
I want you in my life
It's just that maybe somehow you don't see that
And that's okay
Maybe it's just that life is always in the way and there's no way in hell that I can be as important to you as your everyday life
And no, I don't blame you
I don't blame you that each time I reach out to you, you don't notice me the way that I think you will
I don't blame you that when I talk to you, you ignore the fact that I want more than just a simple hello maybe because you don't see me the same as everyone else
I don't blame you that you don't return my calls, nor that your only excuse everytime is that you're busy
I don't blame you for being independent
I don't blame you for having a life
I don't blame you for not seeing me as a first option
I don't blame you for your lack of interest sometimes, hell I don't blame you for your lack of attention
I don't blame you for the way you make me feel when we see each other
I don't blame you for the times that when our eyes meet, I come undone
I don't blame you for having me on a pedestal, a travesty for everyone to see
I don't blame you for keeping me up at night, just wondering what the hell you could possibly be doing
I don't blame you for making me have these thoughts
I don't blame you for the anchors in my chest
I don't blame you for the times I doubted what would become of this
I don't blame you for making me hope
I don't blame you for this letter
I don't blame you for these tears
I don't blame you for making me feel this way
I don't blame you for making me fall
No, I don't blame you for anything
This is my fault from the beginning
I knew you'd be something special, it's just that maybe you see the world in a different light
See, I want you in my life so bad, but it just can't be so
I just wanted you to know that I can't have you, and this is all my fault
I love you
I have to give up on you, so this is goodbye
Sep 28, 2014
Sep 28, 2014 at 9:01 AM UTC