dina101 - Hello Poetry

I wish my mind was a padlock I wish I gave you the key So you can see for yourself What's troubling me Then you'd see the demons that are set free Scary monsters, chasing me My broken heart without defense My crashing soul in need of help After you've been there I'm hoping you'll help I'm hoping you see I break And I melt People say I'm a ***** That I'm "cold" and "selfish" But maybe if I gave you the key... You'd see what's hurting me.

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Sep 20, 2015

Sep 20, 2015 at 6:35 AM UTC

My key

I wish my mind was a padlock I wish I gave you the key So you can see for yourself What's troubling me Then you'd see the demons that are set free Scary monsters, chasing me My broken heart without defense My crashing soul in need of help After you've been there I'm hoping you'll help I'm hoping you see I break And I melt People say I'm a ***** That I'm "cold" and "selfish" But maybe if I gave you the key... You'd see what's hurting me.

16

I met this boy once He was so very sad He needed a friend And for that I was glad He confined in me Every little secret to be told He confined in me What his heart could no longer hold He told me he liked boys And thought I would run away But I obviously shocked him When I told him I would stay I loved him for sure A companion at its best The way we loved each other Nope. It was nothing like the rest He wasn't my friend. He wasn't my best friend. No he wasn't my brother. And he was gay so no, He wasn't my lover. Together weren't different people It was one person in two bodies Together we were better No more bleeding cuts for me No more aloneness for him I told you we were better But one day he had to leave The world had scarred him too deep They called him names And asked him to die He did as they wished and told me goodbye. Next time you think of hurting someone... Just think... They may be leaving someone behind.

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Aug 9, 2015

Aug 9, 2015 at 10:53 AM UTC

More than my best friend

I met this boy once He was so very sad He needed a friend And for that I was glad He confined in me Every little secret to be told He confined in me What his heart could no longer hold He told me he liked boys And thought I would run away But I obviously shocked him When I told him I would stay I loved him for sure A companion at its best The way we loved each other Nope. It was nothing like the rest He wasn't my friend. He wasn't my best friend. No he wasn't my brother. And he was gay so no, He wasn't my lover. Together weren't different people It was one person in two bodies Together we were better No more bleeding cuts for me No more aloneness for him I told you we were better But one day he had to leave The world had scarred him too deep They called him names And asked him to die He did as they wished and told me goodbye. Next time you think of hurting someone... Just think... They may be leaving someone behind.

34

I'm sorry for all I can't say But I'm just taking it day by day I'm learning its okay to be down That sometimes... I can wear a frown I'm learning I don't need to pretend That someday I'll say "way back when" It hurts me then Oh it hurts me now But darling I'm learning to be proud I'm learning to be proud of me... And all I am. Its only now I understand Loving me... Isn't all that bad.

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Jul 28, 2015

Jul 28, 2015 at 12:44 PM UTC

I'm learning

I'm sorry for all I can't say But I'm just taking it day by day I'm learning its okay to be down That sometimes... I can wear a frown I'm learning I don't need to pretend That someday I'll say "way back when" It hurts me then Oh it hurts me now But darling I'm learning to be proud I'm learning to be proud of me... And all I am. Its only now I understand Loving me... Isn't all that bad.

14

Here's my secret. Please listen well... Please don't hate me... And please don't judge. Its already hard to tell. I'm a solider at war I get cuts that leave me raw I get bruises that swell Does this ring a bell? I act all happy... When sometimes I'm not. My eyes are crimson red... From being so bloodshot. I cry and cry For reasons I can't tell I hate myself some days It puts me through hell. So please excuse me if I'm rude... Or pushy... Or mean... I'm just trying to make sure... You never go through the same fate as me.

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Jul 13, 2015

Jul 13, 2015 at 2:27 PM UTC

Here it goes

Here's my secret. Please listen well... Please don't hate me... And please don't judge. Its already hard to tell. I'm a solider at war I get cuts that leave me raw I get bruises that swell Does this ring a bell? I act all happy... When sometimes I'm not. My eyes are crimson red... From being so bloodshot. I cry and cry For reasons I can't tell I hate myself some days It puts me through hell. So please excuse me if I'm rude... Or pushy... Or mean... I'm just trying to make sure... You never go through the same fate as me.

22

I was sitting on my bed... Just like everyday Except today I'd made a plan. To **** myself because to me... Earth is nothing but barren wasteland. But I'd miss him I'd miss the way he makes me smile. I'd miss his laugh And the way he makes living worthwhile I'd miss his protection I'd miss speaking his name I'd just miss him over and over again. I'd miss my friends How beautiful and true The way they think I'm splendid The way they believe in me like no one else I know Oh and my family The cause of my pain and joy I'd miss them all... Even for a second... I know they'd miss me If I were to fall. So as I sat with my razor... Blood rolling down my hands... I thought 'let's do this... Let's give life another chance' I've been clean for weeks now. That's my secret in shell. Its a secret... And when I'm strong enough... I'll tell.

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Jul 13, 2015

Jul 13, 2015 at 2:21 PM UTC

End it all.

I was sitting on my bed... Just like everyday Except today I'd made a plan. To **** myself because to me... Earth is nothing but barren wasteland. But I'd miss him I'd miss the way he makes me smile. I'd miss his laugh And the way he makes living worthwhile I'd miss his protection I'd miss speaking his name I'd just miss him over and over again. I'd miss my friends How beautiful and true The way they think I'm splendid The way they believe in me like no one else I know Oh and my family The cause of my pain and joy I'd miss them all... Even for a second... I know they'd miss me If I were to fall. So as I sat with my razor... Blood rolling down my hands... I thought 'let's do this... Let's give life another chance' I've been clean for weeks now. That's my secret in shell. Its a secret... And when I'm strong enough... I'll tell.

30

She cried. She dies. She's broken inside. How much longer? How many days? Before she gets to end the pain? She doesn't mean it. She doesn't like to cry. But what should she do? What should she say? All she knows is happiness doesn't stay. She tried to smile. She tried to sing. But no one knows the tune... So they weren't listening. She told them to listen. She told them to hear. But they broke her sprit. They caused her fears. Was she too fat? Was she too thin? Was she too ugly? Can she ever win? They said he pain was just for show... But when she hung herself emotionally... I wondered how they still didn't know? Did they know she was hurting? She didn't know they cared. They were too late now. Her sprit was crushed. She just gave up. No matter how hard she tried. It wasn't right. All she dreams of is dying... Where's the light? She gave up because it wasn't enough. Its never enough.

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Jun 1, 2015

Jun 1, 2015 at 11:51 AM UTC

She tried.

She cried. She dies. She's broken inside. How much longer? How many days? Before she gets to end the pain? She doesn't mean it. She doesn't like to cry. But what should she do? What should she say? All she knows is happiness doesn't stay. She tried to smile. She tried to sing. But no one knows the tune... So they weren't listening. She told them to listen. She told them to hear. But they broke her sprit. They caused her fears. Was she too fat? Was she too thin? Was she too ugly? Can she ever win? They said he pain was just for show... But when she hung herself emotionally... I wondered how they still didn't know? Did they know she was hurting? She didn't know they cared. They were too late now. Her sprit was crushed. She just gave up. No matter how hard she tried. It wasn't right. All she dreams of is dying... Where's the light? She gave up because it wasn't enough. Its never enough.

37

My life is like a story. My life is like a book. Just open it up Just have a look But there's just some chapter's.... I'd rather not see Because they're too painful... Painful for me. It hurts because I wrote them I know its my fault But if you read inside the lines You'll see my heart is a volt. It's bolted up safely Away from harm Its tucked away quietly Now I'm not alarmed. These chapters are safe from prying eyes These chapters are safe from lying tounges But they're not safe from me. From my juding eyes From my casting stares From my insolent cries Withering about disappear I'm disappointed in myself. But this kind of sadness... Isn't good for my health. So when you look at my book Please don't judge. This book is my book... From a broken heart... Filled with love.

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Jun 1, 2015

Jun 1, 2015 at 11:34 AM UTC

My book

My life is like a story. My life is like a book. Just open it up Just have a look But there's just some chapter's.... I'd rather not see Because they're too painful... Painful for me. It hurts because I wrote them I know its my fault But if you read inside the lines You'll see my heart is a volt. It's bolted up safely Away from harm Its tucked away quietly Now I'm not alarmed. These chapters are safe from prying eyes These chapters are safe from lying tounges But they're not safe from me. From my juding eyes From my casting stares From my insolent cries Withering about disappear I'm disappointed in myself. But this kind of sadness... Isn't good for my health. So when you look at my book Please don't judge. This book is my book... From a broken heart... Filled with love.

31

I didn't say no to hurt you. I said no to stop hurting me. Didn't you see all the things I did for you... Were causing me pain? Causing me grief? Did you know that at 1am when you were in bed... I was plotting how to clean my own blood as I saw red? Oh, and I said no because for every time you made me cry... There's a scar that reminds me why. And my personal favorite was when, You broke me in half and I picked up the pieces... Again. I could never hurt you. Nope. Never. That's why I left babe, honey, sugar... I left because I know how it feels to be broken. I left because I know how it feels to love someone with all the broken pieces of your heart. I left because I can potentially hurt you... I left because hurting you doesn't seem so bad.

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May 17, 2015

May 17, 2015 at 8:54 AM UTC

Love and Hate

I didn't say no to hurt you. I said no to stop hurting me. Didn't you see all the things I did for you... Were causing me pain? Causing me grief? Did you know that at 1am when you were in bed... I was plotting how to clean my own blood as I saw red? Oh, and I said no because for every time you made me cry... There's a scar that reminds me why. And my personal favorite was when, You broke me in half and I picked up the pieces... Again. I could never hurt you. Nope. Never. That's why I left babe, honey, sugar... I left because I know how it feels to be broken. I left because I know how it feels to love someone with all the broken pieces of your heart. I left because I can potentially hurt you... I left because hurting you doesn't seem so bad.

17

I've been down lately. Can't find a way out lately. I've been lost lately. Loosing it all lately. I've been crying lately. Because I'm too mad lately. I'm choking lately. Cause of my deep hole lately. I've been hard to reach lately. I've been hard to teach lately. The reality is lately... Lately I've been sad.

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Apr 27, 2015

Apr 27, 2015 at 4:42 PM UTC

Lately

I've been down lately. Can't find a way out lately. I've been lost lately. Loosing it all lately. I've been crying lately. Because I'm too mad lately. I'm choking lately. Cause of my deep hole lately. I've been hard to reach lately. I've been hard to teach lately. The reality is lately... Lately I've been sad.

12

Its all good when no one knows. Its all good when it doesn't show. Its all good when the tears you cry... Are covered up with mindless sighs. 'I'm fine' 'I'm okay' These are the lies we tend to say. People see you happy. But is that how you feel? They say it will pass... But for now its real. Cause the things in your head Stay there instead. Its the thoughts.... The thoughts that **** Yet we still smile with all our will. So next time you see someone smile... It would be worth your while To see if they're really okay. You see a smile can go both ways. Sometimes a smile.... A smile is as good... As the weakest cry for help.

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Apr 22, 2015

Apr 22, 2015 at 10:09 AM UTC

Smile.

Its all good when no one knows. Its all good when it doesn't show. Its all good when the tears you cry... Are covered up with mindless sighs. 'I'm fine' 'I'm okay' These are the lies we tend to say. People see you happy. But is that how you feel? They say it will pass... But for now its real. Cause the things in your head Stay there instead. Its the thoughts.... The thoughts that **** Yet we still smile with all our will. So next time you see someone smile... It would be worth your while To see if they're really okay. You see a smile can go both ways. Sometimes a smile.... A smile is as good... As the weakest cry for help.

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