dhalen - Hello Poetry

I feel myself falling down the familiar steps of despair Each step my breath is taken from me Each step my strength weakens beneath me I can hardly hold up my frame as I walk I feel my legs shake with each step “Just one step more” I hear them saying But I can hardly take a step at all For I shall step into misery and despair I feel myself failing Falling… Down that familiar spiral that I wished to avoid An endless well of pain and suffering I will not take the leap Rather I shall be shoved in By words voiced as encouragement Yet all I can feel is the venom behind them They say they wish to help me So why do their words cause me such pain? Is this love? Is love just misery? Is love just pain? I used to be so happy I thought I had finally escaped The bottomless well of pain and suffering Instead, I have slipped on the last step I find myself falling once more I tell myself to hold on I tell myself to get better I tell myself I need to do better My hands slip when I reach out A hand comes my way to help I grab on for dear life Only to find they have dropped me down The bottomless well of pain and suffering I know I am loved I know I am cared for So why does their affection cause me such pain? I weep before them Willing to shed my pride and armor I am told my tears are ugly My frustration is hideous My anger, useless I do not wish for these feelings I do not wish to feel at all I do not wish for anyone to see Because all they see is the hideous thing I am A poor pitiful creature Slowly falling down The bottomless well of pain and suffering.

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Apr 29, 2020

Apr 29, 2020 at 12:29 PM UTC

Misery

I feel myself falling down the familiar steps of despair Each step my breath is taken from me Each step my strength weakens beneath me I can hardly hold up my frame as I walk I feel my legs shake with each step “Just one step more” I hear them saying But I can hardly take a step at all For I shall step into misery and despair I feel myself failing Falling… Down that familiar spiral that I wished to avoid An endless well of pain and suffering I will not take the leap Rather I shall be shoved in By words voiced as encouragement Yet all I can feel is the venom behind them They say they wish to help me So why do their words cause me such pain? Is this love? Is love just misery? Is love just pain? I used to be so happy I thought I had finally escaped The bottomless well of pain and suffering Instead, I have slipped on the last step I find myself falling once more I tell myself to hold on I tell myself to get better I tell myself I need to do better My hands slip when I reach out A hand comes my way to help I grab on for dear life Only to find they have dropped me down The bottomless well of pain and suffering I know I am loved I know I am cared for So why does their affection cause me such pain? I weep before them Willing to shed my pride and armor I am told my tears are ugly My frustration is hideous My anger, useless I do not wish for these feelings I do not wish to feel at all I do not wish for anyone to see Because all they see is the hideous thing I am A poor pitiful creature Slowly falling down The bottomless well of pain and suffering.

50

As my heart is being shattered My love is gone I miss on the forever dawn I see I wish he will find That I am the one Then we will walk together on the warm sun To my lover He will see I love him forever so Will he love me?

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Mar 25, 2020

Mar 25, 2020 at 2:07 PM UTC

Old Admirer

As my heart is being shattered My love is gone I miss on the forever dawn I see I wish he will find That I am the one Then we will walk together on the warm sun To my lover He will see I love him forever so Will he love me?

10

I found myself in a field The grass was spun from silk Bowing beneath my every step Kissing my ankles as I went by I found myself in a field Over looking the beautiful blue sea Now painted with the colors of gold and pink As the sun shined over me I found myself in a golden light The fading hour of the sun Everything it touched was given the gift of beauty Filled with its fading warmth that clung to me As the sun slowly sunk into the night I found myself in a grove The trees of a forest surrounding me I looked up at the sky to see the infinite stars And heard someone asking me "How can you make constellations in this mess?" "It's connecting the dots you see." My finger raised to the sky Each star that graced my finger tips trailed with me Painting the many pictures I saw up above I fell asleep in a forest grove Awoken by the soft golden sun "I don't want to have to go." From the fields and forests My soul is rested Here in the fields and forest But rest is temporary As are these dreams.

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Feb 5, 2020

Feb 5, 2020 at 11:18 AM UTC

I found myself

I found myself in a field The grass was spun from silk Bowing beneath my every step Kissing my ankles as I went by I found myself in a field Over looking the beautiful blue sea Now painted with the colors of gold and pink As the sun shined over me I found myself in a golden light The fading hour of the sun Everything it touched was given the gift of beauty Filled with its fading warmth that clung to me As the sun slowly sunk into the night I found myself in a grove The trees of a forest surrounding me I looked up at the sky to see the infinite stars And heard someone asking me "How can you make constellations in this mess?" "It's connecting the dots you see." My finger raised to the sky Each star that graced my finger tips trailed with me Painting the many pictures I saw up above I fell asleep in a forest grove Awoken by the soft golden sun "I don't want to have to go." From the fields and forests My soul is rested Here in the fields and forest But rest is temporary As are these dreams.

30

Sometimes when I close my eyes I swear I can see you Someone that makes my heart beat wildly That gives me shivers of warmth and love down my spine But all I have ever witnessed Has been in my mind's eyes I want to believe you are real Not just a figment of my lonely imagination I want to believe you are out there Picturing me in your mind Filled with wonder seeing my smile and my eyes Yet I somehow feel you are my Pygmalion A stone cold picturesque image of longing That I cling onto in the long dark nights Waiting for the gods above to come down And move your stone cold visage of my mind Into the soft warm flesh of reality I want to say I look forward to meeting you And I hope one day I do And I will sing my praises up to the sky Up to the gods Who granted me my greatest joy My greatest creation My Pygmalion

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Feb 4, 2020

Feb 4, 2020 at 10:27 AM UTC

My Pygmalion

Sometimes when I close my eyes I swear I can see you Someone that makes my heart beat wildly That gives me shivers of warmth and love down my spine But all I have ever witnessed Has been in my mind's eyes I want to believe you are real Not just a figment of my lonely imagination I want to believe you are out there Picturing me in your mind Filled with wonder seeing my smile and my eyes Yet I somehow feel you are my Pygmalion A stone cold picturesque image of longing That I cling onto in the long dark nights Waiting for the gods above to come down And move your stone cold visage of my mind Into the soft warm flesh of reality I want to say I look forward to meeting you And I hope one day I do And I will sing my praises up to the sky Up to the gods Who granted me my greatest joy My greatest creation My Pygmalion

23

The song plays on Though it scratches itself up Playing on repeat over and over again The same old beat The same old lyrics Singing away The words had stopped making sense Long ago Still it keeps playing the same song It keeps doing the same things Nothing has changed How can I expect a broken record To fix my life?

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Jan 20, 2020

Jan 20, 2020 at 11:37 AM UTC

Broken Record

The song plays on Though it scratches itself up Playing on repeat over and over again The same old beat The same old lyrics Singing away The words had stopped making sense Long ago Still it keeps playing the same song It keeps doing the same things Nothing has changed How can I expect a broken record To fix my life?

13

Give me a pair of scissors Something sharp Let it cut deep into my skin Making my heart bleed The strings are a tangled mess Everything is ruined The puppet master holds me up But I cannot move freely I am bound to old strings Worn strings I want to cut myself free If I do... Would there be anything left for me? I feel the blade in my hand The match in the other Am I burning bridges? Or trying to make a garden bloom? Give me a pair of scissors What I cut away will allow me to grow What I cut away will allow me to move What I cut away will allow me freedom

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Jan 17, 2020

Jan 17, 2020 at 11:00 AM UTC

Cutting Ties

Give me a pair of scissors Something sharp Let it cut deep into my skin Making my heart bleed The strings are a tangled mess Everything is ruined The puppet master holds me up But I cannot move freely I am bound to old strings Worn strings I want to cut myself free If I do... Would there be anything left for me? I feel the blade in my hand The match in the other Am I burning bridges? Or trying to make a garden bloom? Give me a pair of scissors What I cut away will allow me to grow What I cut away will allow me to move What I cut away will allow me freedom

21

It's been storming for a while Can't you hear the window panes shaking Can't you feel the house shivering From the bitter wet cold... I think something is leaking My heart has a crack Now it's dripping onto the floor It's been storming for a while in there I feel the thunder roar The howling of the wind I can feel my heart freezing Then I feel that strike of lightning One sharp crack Breaking down the roof of my heart Pouring rain Pain... Maybe that house needed to burn down In the howling rain I can build it up again Better than before A warm place inside During any weather Even the worst storm

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Jan 16, 2020

Jan 16, 2020 at 4:13 PM UTC

The Strike of Light

It's been storming for a while Can't you hear the window panes shaking Can't you feel the house shivering From the bitter wet cold... I think something is leaking My heart has a crack Now it's dripping onto the floor It's been storming for a while in there I feel the thunder roar The howling of the wind I can feel my heart freezing Then I feel that strike of lightning One sharp crack Breaking down the roof of my heart Pouring rain Pain... Maybe that house needed to burn down In the howling rain I can build it up again Better than before A warm place inside During any weather Even the worst storm

23

I'm afraid to take a step. I didn't think I could walk this far. The road was so clear before. It had its wear and tear. I walked through the thorns. A smile on my face. Tears springing in my eyes. I've tripped. I've stumbled. I've fallen. I've gotten back up. I have to continue walking. But I don't know where I'm going. The road is covered by a fog. I'm too scared to move forward. I can't see the road. I'm afraid that I will arrive at the end. What lays at the end of the road? Will it be what I've always wanted? Or everything I've always feared? Am I walking the path of enlightenment? Or am I stumbling down the road of self fulfilling prophecies? I can't see the road. I want someone to hold my hand as I walk. But I am a lone traveler, on a road I can't see.

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Jan 15, 2020

Jan 15, 2020 at 10:35 AM UTC

I Can't See the Road

I'm afraid to take a step. I didn't think I could walk this far. The road was so clear before. It had its wear and tear. I walked through the thorns. A smile on my face. Tears springing in my eyes. I've tripped. I've stumbled. I've fallen. I've gotten back up. I have to continue walking. But I don't know where I'm going. The road is covered by a fog. I'm too scared to move forward. I can't see the road. I'm afraid that I will arrive at the end. What lays at the end of the road? Will it be what I've always wanted? Or everything I've always feared? Am I walking the path of enlightenment? Or am I stumbling down the road of self fulfilling prophecies? I can't see the road. I want someone to hold my hand as I walk. But I am a lone traveler, on a road I can't see.

26

Slipping inside... I let the water wash over me Scalding and steaming I feel myself melt in the heat Sliding down into the water Crawling over my head The world around me drowns I do not hear the door creak open and shut I do not hear the distant cough It rings through the halls like a bell Tolling death Sink further in Into the dark warm waters So that my tears mix inside Spoiling the fresh water with the bitter salt of sadness Even under here I can hear the ringing This is how I disappear Death's warm embrace comes for me Deep in the water

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Jan 7, 2020

Jan 7, 2020 at 11:31 AM UTC

This is How I Disappear

Slipping inside... I let the water wash over me Scalding and steaming I feel myself melt in the heat Sliding down into the water Crawling over my head The world around me drowns I do not hear the door creak open and shut I do not hear the distant cough It rings through the halls like a bell Tolling death Sink further in Into the dark warm waters So that my tears mix inside Spoiling the fresh water with the bitter salt of sadness Even under here I can hear the ringing This is how I disappear Death's warm embrace comes for me Deep in the water

20

It comes in passing Above us Upon the ground we may not see them We may not hear their messages The words of warning and advice Go unheeded Carried off by winds Much louder than their whispering voices I tilt my gaze to the sky Watching their words fly by I wonder how long they have been singing Who had heard their songs? Did they hear them in time? Or was the last note they heard one of melancholy Of dreams untapped and unrealized The chains that bind us down from joining them in their flight Keep us from their songs They are the ones we put on ourselves But the shackles have been loosened Wings freed and flowing I join their chorus of wisdom And hope others may finally hear our song

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Jan 6, 2020

Jan 6, 2020 at 1:16 PM UTC

Wisdom Flies on Wings

It comes in passing Above us Upon the ground we may not see them We may not hear their messages The words of warning and advice Go unheeded Carried off by winds Much louder than their whispering voices I tilt my gaze to the sky Watching their words fly by I wonder how long they have been singing Who had heard their songs? Did they hear them in time? Or was the last note they heard one of melancholy Of dreams untapped and unrealized The chains that bind us down from joining them in their flight Keep us from their songs They are the ones we put on ourselves But the shackles have been loosened Wings freed and flowing I join their chorus of wisdom And hope others may finally hear our song

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