Theres close scattered all over the house and dishes mounted up in the sink and everything has been dark since we returned back home, it terrified me to see one of the strongest men i know, my father, cry. Ive never seen someone hurt so much, i had never seen him cry ever I'm my whole 16 years of life, and it wasn't much he cried for about 3 seconds about 2 times throughout the whole funeral, but the rest of the time when his eyes would not tear, i could see the immense pain in his eyes and it troubled me to see someone so strong and brave break down and hurt, it hurt me to see my father like that my dad has always been a hard person to talk to and an even harder person to relate to. I didn't know how to comfort him nor how to make things better. I haven't seen him since the day we got back we've returned to our usual routine of him going to work at the crack of dawn and returning about 10 and me going to school leaving no time for us to see each other let alone interact with each other.
May 17, 2015
May 17, 2015 at 12:33 AM UTC
Torn and unsure, should i follow my instincts blindly or think this throughly, should i keep to myself and stand alone, rely on only myself, or open up, what is right and wrong, should they even be distinguished? Or should life be simply that just life, pure life, just simply living without any expectations or categories? What is there to do? Keep to your self and do nothing? Or to do everything.
Jan 2, 2015
Jan 2, 2015 at 1:20 PM UTC
Im a country away from everything and everyone, all my worries are far far away, i have no reason to be sad, but still i find myself here in an empty room crying at 11:36 P.M.
Dec 26, 2014
Dec 26, 2014 at 12:36 AM UTC
Confused on the perception of wrong and right or if the two should even be distinguished, I'm lost and indecisive on wether i should act based on instinct or thought, I'm uncertain of who i am and what i think, i am unsure of myself and my needs and wants.
Dec 25, 2014
Dec 25, 2014 at 9:33 PM UTC
everything starts to feel so unreal, I've lost track of who i am, I've lost control and the person i have become feels like a lie, positivity feels so far away, happiness feels so unattainable and i know I'm slowly leading myself to my own demise, I'm slowly dieing inside and everything is just all depending on time, how long will it take until i crack?
Dec 17, 2014
Dec 17, 2014 at 2:40 AM UTC
I know you dont notice the way i admire you when you pass by, or when we talk and my eyes light up and my heart starts to beat faster, you are oblivious to what i feel for you, you have captured my attention like no one else ever before, but i know nothing will ever come of this, maybe its because were too different, or timing, or something much more complex that i cant seem to figure out.
Nov 25, 2014
Nov 25, 2014 at 12:56 PM UTC
Melachonic, yet joyful, and still no care in the world, i don't even know what struggle is, i still don't know what i want, its like a whirlpool of emotions, and i am so unsure of my self, blinded by something unknown to me. Blinded, stopped, and disabled.
Nov 24, 2014
Nov 24, 2014 at 11:03 AM UTC
Im just starting my day, its early in the morning, and I'm in pain, a sort of pain that cant be shaken, i am melachony, i am pain, i am sadness, its become a part of me.
Nov 24, 2014
Nov 24, 2014 at 10:55 AM UTC
I dont have my head on straight, im putting my wants before my needs, my priorities are all messed up, and my mind is so far gone, my decisions are slurred, my morals are derranged and yet again i dont know what im doing with my life, i dont know where i went wrong, i dont know when everything turned to **** i dont know what to depend on anymore.
Nov 16, 2014
Nov 16, 2014 at 2:49 PM UTC
Your absence creates this endless pit of despair inside of me, just seeing you makes me so excerntric, just your existence fills me with joy, i wish there was more.
Nov 10, 2014
Nov 10, 2014 at 4:12 PM UTC