desecratedex - Hello Poetry

Relapse tastes like cheap beer and clenched fists Lust for life and homelessness Flooded with nostalgia from the very first sip Love is a cold aluminum kiss Hazy dazed laziness Sunshine & spit Miller Lite is my favorite weapon Toxic intoxicated entanglement Liquid courage & devious motivation Criminal elixir Watch me drink the poison expecting everyone else to die I'm only lying because I love you Flame too hot to touch Burning down everything... I cared about it all once. Myself, my life, my reputation But what's the f*cking point? Giving a **** is just premeditated disappointment. How will I ever get out of this labyrinth? The inevitable irresistible slip, over and over All over this meaningless existence

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:43 AM UTC

7/19/2020

Relapse tastes like cheap beer and clenched fists Lust for life and homelessness Flooded with nostalgia from the very first sip Love is a cold aluminum kiss Hazy dazed laziness Sunshine & spit Miller Lite is my favorite weapon Toxic intoxicated entanglement Liquid courage & devious motivation Criminal elixir Watch me drink the poison expecting everyone else to die I'm only lying because I love you Flame too hot to touch Burning down everything... I cared about it all once. Myself, my life, my reputation But what's the f*cking point? Giving a **** is just premeditated disappointment. How will I ever get out of this labyrinth? The inevitable irresistible slip, over and over All over this meaningless existence

20

Slowly letting go Daydreaming lovers and lies untold Bold but homely Bored and lonely Cross-eyed and painless Strung out and brainless Uncomfortable oh comely Emptiness, friendlessness I still exist - I think. I know this isn't all there is ***** beautiful, broke, and free Is the only state in which I find peace. Dawn is breaking and so am I Daylight bright in misty eyes I woke alone, in my tent in a forest; hugged and kissed the void good morning I miss something I've never had and it's vicious in my mind.

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:39 AM UTC

7/18/2020

Slowly letting go Daydreaming lovers and lies untold Bold but homely Bored and lonely Cross-eyed and painless Strung out and brainless Uncomfortable oh comely Emptiness, friendlessness I still exist - I think. I know this isn't all there is ***** beautiful, broke, and free Is the only state in which I find peace. Dawn is breaking and so am I Daylight bright in misty eyes I woke alone, in my tent in a forest; hugged and kissed the void good morning I miss something I've never had and it's vicious in my mind.

17

I don't need a hand to hold Could you do it all alone if you had to? Living in this misery By myself just I and me If I could open up my heart I don't know that there's any part of me that even wants to Living in a foreign language You can't reach me here Nobody can You can't see me Can you blame me? Am I real? This body's so faulty Thoughts worse Head hurts Sparse words Throat burns Sharp things False door Locked away is something more than a broken wh*re I think?

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:35 AM UTC

7/15/2020

I don't need a hand to hold Could you do it all alone if you had to? Living in this misery By myself just I and me If I could open up my heart I don't know that there's any part of me that even wants to Living in a foreign language You can't reach me here Nobody can You can't see me Can you blame me? Am I real? This body's so faulty Thoughts worse Head hurts Sparse words Throat burns Sharp things False door Locked away is something more than a broken wh*re I think?

21

A drowning person is not troubled by the falling rain Embracing pain I've ignored far too long Chasing dragons, suspended in denial. I am delusional with love. Bruised, eluding these illusions. Cling to what feels safe. Cold, calculated; Jaded smile. I'm hiding behind it all my nasty habits and the tragedies of my past. A mystery, or just a loser encased in egotistical gluttony? Can you find me?

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:29 AM UTC

7/11/2020

A drowning person is not troubled by the falling rain Embracing pain I've ignored far too long Chasing dragons, suspended in denial. I am delusional with love. Bruised, eluding these illusions. Cling to what feels safe. Cold, calculated; Jaded smile. I'm hiding behind it all my nasty habits and the tragedies of my past. A mystery, or just a loser encased in egotistical gluttony? Can you find me?

10

Eyes wider than Ohio Staring directly into the truth I've spent years in denial about. Psychedelic doubt Ugly within, uglier without. Questioning myself and every decision I've ever made Ego dissolution, consequential confusion Every move has a karmic influence So we spend our days in the sunlight of the spirit Summertime eternal Flowers will die but ever we are in bloom Screaming "doom" & "i love you" From the womb to the tomb.

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:23 AM UTC

7/10/2020

Eyes wider than Ohio Staring directly into the truth I've spent years in denial about. Psychedelic doubt Ugly within, uglier without. Questioning myself and every decision I've ever made Ego dissolution, consequential confusion Every move has a karmic influence So we spend our days in the sunlight of the spirit Summertime eternal Flowers will die but ever we are in bloom Screaming "doom" & "i love you" From the womb to the tomb.

12

Smashed skull mentality. Altered states of mind/ sober all the time Slick, sickly cycling. Dreaming of love and of dying Slimy sucky lust No trust but I'm trying Sticky fingers; Blue, brown, green eyes Why do I appreciate, have mercy for every soul but my own? This might be a house but it isn't a home. Sweaty naked bodies, distasteful escape. Wasteful mind Bring me your time. Minefield life just trying to survive most days. Brain waves moody haze with your hand in mine I am thriving. Pillow soft lips a kiss away from drowning in a strangers' eyes. Endless longing set the days on fire. Time warp, essential sensuality Warm breeze running through my mind Black poison blood, sweat, c*m, and confusion populate my veins. A race toward brokenheartedness or objectivity Lift the curse of eternal shame. Forgotten toxicity embalmed in simplicity and transparency Complacency, erasing a disgusting history Bury me in the laurels you rest on.

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:18 AM UTC

5/8/2020

Smashed skull mentality. Altered states of mind/ sober all the time Slick, sickly cycling. Dreaming of love and of dying Slimy sucky lust No trust but I'm trying Sticky fingers; Blue, brown, green eyes Why do I appreciate, have mercy for every soul but my own? This might be a house but it isn't a home. Sweaty naked bodies, distasteful escape. Wasteful mind Bring me your time. Minefield life just trying to survive most days. Brain waves moody haze with your hand in mine I am thriving. Pillow soft lips a kiss away from drowning in a strangers' eyes. Endless longing set the days on fire. Time warp, essential sensuality Warm breeze running through my mind Black poison blood, sweat, c*m, and confusion populate my veins. A race toward brokenheartedness or objectivity Lift the curse of eternal shame. Forgotten toxicity embalmed in simplicity and transparency Complacency, erasing a disgusting history Bury me in the laurels you rest on.

23

Divine is the wilderness Pristine in it's dancing stillness Breeze echoing through leaves Trees stretch up to kiss the open air Embracing, waving hello to you and to me To the clouds, the birds, the butterflies and bees. Stars, sun, and moon Say hello and smile too We are them, they are we. I am you, you are me. Everything in everything; all branches of the same ancient and beautiful universal tree. I think I've had enough of society, daydreaming from the inside of a ***** factory. All those pretty lights, glistening and glowing; Turned stars to satellites, listening and knowing. Humankind traded their souls for ego and every day it's f*cking showing The wind will keep blowing, and the trees will keep waving. Freedom and peace are everywhere, waiting.

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:12 AM UTC

4/22/2020

Divine is the wilderness Pristine in it's dancing stillness Breeze echoing through leaves Trees stretch up to kiss the open air Embracing, waving hello to you and to me To the clouds, the birds, the butterflies and bees. Stars, sun, and moon Say hello and smile too We are them, they are we. I am you, you are me. Everything in everything; all branches of the same ancient and beautiful universal tree. I think I've had enough of society, daydreaming from the inside of a ***** factory. All those pretty lights, glistening and glowing; Turned stars to satellites, listening and knowing. Humankind traded their souls for ego and every day it's f*cking showing The wind will keep blowing, and the trees will keep waving. Freedom and peace are everywhere, waiting.

15

I'm not really a poet, but I'll write a poem anyway. Reading a good poem is like c*mming, but for your soul I don't know whether to be insulted or to thank you for calling me a succubus. Humans make my brain hurt. Yes, that includes me. I don't know what I want but I'm pretty sure I'll get it. I think I'd be a better writer if I didn't think so much. Can't tell if I'm "need to eat" hungry or if it's the black hole in my chest beckoning to be fed. Some days live wire lust for life Others, the walking dead. (Un)Inspired Pyro You don't have to rhyme to be a poem. How sweet it is!

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:07 AM UTC

3/20/2020

I'm not really a poet, but I'll write a poem anyway. Reading a good poem is like c*mming, but for your soul I don't know whether to be insulted or to thank you for calling me a succubus. Humans make my brain hurt. Yes, that includes me. I don't know what I want but I'm pretty sure I'll get it. I think I'd be a better writer if I didn't think so much. Can't tell if I'm "need to eat" hungry or if it's the black hole in my chest beckoning to be fed. Some days live wire lust for life Others, the walking dead. (Un)Inspired Pyro You don't have to rhyme to be a poem. How sweet it is!

12

I carry the torch of this misery. The bearer of all secrets that kept us terminally sick. Held hostage by brokenness Hostess to alcoholism, cynicism, paranoid delusions A pillar upon which a false empire was built? Was the straw that broke the camel's back composed of grass or guilt? A person who feels like home can be dangerous when you carry the blame of destroying the one you grew in. Emerged from my isolation to walk under the stars. $11.11 was the total for my holiday purchase of alcohol and cigarettes I wished upon a scar that I would one day grow to be whole. I listened to your playlist on the cold walk home. These metaphors for living pure are cheesy All existence is chaos Anthems of anger, ballads for those who have lost Holding fading souls and cradling hearts like hammocks for the homeless

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Aug 23, 2020

Aug 23, 2020 at 12:03 AM UTC

12/25/2019

I carry the torch of this misery. The bearer of all secrets that kept us terminally sick. Held hostage by brokenness Hostess to alcoholism, cynicism, paranoid delusions A pillar upon which a false empire was built? Was the straw that broke the camel's back composed of grass or guilt? A person who feels like home can be dangerous when you carry the blame of destroying the one you grew in. Emerged from my isolation to walk under the stars. $11.11 was the total for my holiday purchase of alcohol and cigarettes I wished upon a scar that I would one day grow to be whole. I listened to your playlist on the cold walk home. These metaphors for living pure are cheesy All existence is chaos Anthems of anger, ballads for those who have lost Holding fading souls and cradling hearts like hammocks for the homeless

15

There are forbidden things bursting forth from beneath my tongue like blooming flowers from the ground. Urging me to the arms of strangers. No, there will never be another special one, no like-minded soul to trust and confide in. My past rusts within me. I am a human vault with no combination. Feeling nostalgic again for relationships I ruined. On purpose in distrust I'm alone with all this lust again. Sometimes self-awareness feels like a sham. Will I ever know who I am? Knowing me is more an eternal sigh and shake of the head than a pleasure. I wish I was alright but I just might have to become okay with being all wrong forever. Band-aids don't work on hearts. Good things aren't the only things that fall apart. Nobody starts out exactly where they need to be. The journey is the best part, though it isn't always pretty. "I'd rather be a lonely forest than a busy street." We all can be ugly, we all can be beautiful. Most importantly, we all can be whoever we want to be. I want to stop obsessing over the wound and pay attention to the healing. Accept the past, begin forgiving. Trek the bumpy road ahead to self-love and recovery.

0

Aug 22, 2020

Aug 22, 2020 at 11:59 PM UTC

9/30/2019

There are forbidden things bursting forth from beneath my tongue like blooming flowers from the ground. Urging me to the arms of strangers. No, there will never be another special one, no like-minded soul to trust and confide in. My past rusts within me. I am a human vault with no combination. Feeling nostalgic again for relationships I ruined. On purpose in distrust I'm alone with all this lust again. Sometimes self-awareness feels like a sham. Will I ever know who I am? Knowing me is more an eternal sigh and shake of the head than a pleasure. I wish I was alright but I just might have to become okay with being all wrong forever. Band-aids don't work on hearts. Good things aren't the only things that fall apart. Nobody starts out exactly where they need to be. The journey is the best part, though it isn't always pretty. "I'd rather be a lonely forest than a busy street." We all can be ugly, we all can be beautiful. Most importantly, we all can be whoever we want to be. I want to stop obsessing over the wound and pay attention to the healing. Accept the past, begin forgiving. Trek the bumpy road ahead to self-love and recovery.

18