delmo-druthersWhisper

American

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Godfather Slice And A Medium Coke To GoI never really wanted to have an agent / Just one day I met this lady and she starting arranging my gigs and stuff / She gave me this kelly green handkerchief and told me to wear it in my left back pocket at all times

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8.4k

The Too Proud Street Vendor Who Never Wears Khaki16th, 17th, 18th chapel I don't care how many of them you make / If there's no gift shop how am I supposed to remember I was ever there? / In Germany I got a mug and a spoon

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2.6k

Now We're Eating SpaghettiI applied for an internship at The Hunting Channel / The opportunity was pointed out to me by my aunt / I only applied for it to make her happy

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1.4k

It's Actually Really Hard To Crouch For That LongI have been trying to socialize with more craftspeople / There are lots of color collages around here and I want to trade them for home improvement work / Like my bathroom tile is totally messed from all the cat litter

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939

Glad You AskedI know! / The pattern is called "saddle blanket" / But it's subtler than most southwesternish type stuff

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735

I Think They're Only Open Til 5:30 Or SomethingI can't use this cable it's a different color than all the other ones / No, uncle, really I can't use it / No, way more Can't than Won't and you know that

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700

Breath of Fresh JeffJeff, hey / Hey are you okay? / Jeff, take a breath

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691

I Always Use The Orange OneThese coasters look like little vinyl records / I like it when songs on a record blend together in sequence like one really long song / Sometimes I have to press "pause" and make some hot tea to stay grounded

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643

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