He touches you in all the wrong places,
"Dad, stop," you tend to utter,
but quickly after, he shoves another dollar bill into your mouth.
He says nothing, just stares.
Tears form in your eyes,
but you hold them back.
You convince yourself that you're stronger than that,
you're stronger than the tears.
But darling,
what monster convinced you that crying meant weakness?
Who dared to tell you that if you cried,
it meant you were weak?
"Go buy yourself something pretty," is all he mutters,
and you walk away like nothing even happened.
You throw yourself onto the bed,
shove your face into your pillow and lose yourself.
You don't even know who you are anymore,
he's destroying you.
You wonder why no one notices the sadness in your eyes,
or the lack of your beautiful smiles.
You put on a mask,
you try to hide it for as long as you can.
"Dad, stop."
Dollar bill.
Five years.
Five. Years.
That’s how long it takes you,
to finally let someone in.
That's how long it takes you,
to reveal the source of your pain.
To put a reason behind why you search for attention
in all the wrong places.
It feels like he stripped you of your identity,
but you're still you.
You are still beautiful,
you are still strong,
you are enough.
You are everything,
And so much more. //
Aug 7, 2017
Aug 7, 2017 at 2:19 AM UTC
You kissed me
and I felt air exiting my body.
I was a chimney,
and you're the fire that caused the fumes.
I kissed you
and air reentered,
but it was different,
it wasn't mine.
Your lips touched mine,
and suddenly I was a deflated balloon
with all its air,
gone.
My lips touched yours,
and instantly I was inflated
with a different air,
with yours.
You kissed me,
and took the breath from my soul.
I kissed you,
and told you that I didn't want it back
because yours
makes me feel more -
whole. //
*written on April 07, 2017
Jun 8, 2017
Jun 8, 2017 at 8:21 PM UTC
If he really loved you,
he wouldn't be able to put his hand on your face.
Unless he was caressing you,
or wiping your tears away,
or holding you to kiss you.
If he really loved you,
he would try to understand why you got upset,
rather than try to come up with yet another excuse.
If he really loved you,
he would be willing to talk to you to solve problems,
rather than lock himself in the basement playing video games.
If he really loved you,
he would admit to all the wrong things he has done,
but instead, he blames you for everything.
If he really loved you,
the sight of you crying would put him in pain,
but evidently it doesn't phase him,
and that's why he walks further away each time a tear falls.
If he really loved you,
he would notice how much he has hurt you,
but he continuously adds to your pain each day.
If he really loved you,
He wouldn't constantly apologize and say he won't do it again,
then instantly do it as another problem arises.
If he really loved you,
he wouldn't have thrown you against the wall,
or pinned you down onto the floor to punch you.
He wouldn't take your phone each night
to check on who you're texting.
He wouldn't allow you to cry yourself to sleep.
He wouldn't put a gun to your head,
or a knife to your throat.
If you really loved yourself,
you wouldn't allow him to treat you like that.
But no one ever taught you to love yourself,
only to love others.
No one ever told you how you deserved to be treated,
So you allow yourself to be thrown around.
You are not a ragdoll,
You are a princess.
So hold your head high,
fix your tiara,
and smile. //
Dec 10, 2016
Dec 10, 2016 at 3:02 AM UTC
Go ahead,
push me up against the wall
and whisper sweet nothings in my ear,
tell me all the things she wanted to hear.
Put your hands around my neck,
slam me down on our bed,
put me in the same position you put her.
Go ahead,
hurt me more than you already have.
I was never good enough for you, was I?
Don't even try to form a lie,
because if I was good enough,
you wouldn't have gone to her.
Or maybe the problem isn't me, it's you.
Maybe you just can't be satisfied?
Why are you getting so defensive?
Did I hit a nerve?
Oh, you're getting angry now,
but I fail to understand why.
If I could've contained my anger when I walked in
and saw you in our bed with her,
I'm sure you can contain yours.
I'm simply stating facts,
the truth hurts, doesn't it?
I've never wanted to hurt you,
but you've set out to hurt me.
I've forgiven you a million and one times,
yet you just slap me in the face afterwards.
**How was she?
Was she good?
Was she better?
Was she worth it?**
I hope she was,
because if she wasn't,
she just caused you to lose the one person who
was always there for you.
You've hurt me too many times now,
I'm done. //
05.26.16
- Poet
(db)
Jul 19, 2016
Jul 19, 2016 at 11:27 AM UTC
Your lips
never quite
tasted like poison,
they seemed more like alcohol,
and I didn't know
kissing them
would be dangerous,
until I died. //
03.23.15
- Poet
(db)
Jul 18, 2016
Jul 18, 2016 at 2:53 PM UTC
As you stood
in front of me,
while I admired
the beauty
of the night sky.
I then realized
that the true beauty
I was admiring,
was you. //
04.03.15
- Poet
(db)
Jul 18, 2016
Jul 18, 2016 at 2:35 PM UTC
The first thing he said was,
"Sorry, I'm not usually the type to cry,
but I loved her, I still do, I always will, forever."
No one knew what to say or even what to do,
persons came and hugged him,
but it didn't make him feel any better,
their hugs weren't going to bring her back.
"She's the love of my life, absolutely no one
will ever be able to compare to her,
but now she's gone and I'm alone again.
She always knew what to say, or what to do,
but she's not here now, so what do I do?
Everyone offers me their condolences and
I appreciate that, but it doesn't help, it really doesn't.
All it does is remind me that she's gone,
that she's never returning, that my baby is gone."
They all knew that talking to him now wouldn't help,
so they just sat there and watched him cry.
They just sat there,
wishing they could bring her back,
but knowing that they can't.
"I don't mean to be such a crybaby,
but when you lose the love of your life,
it's the worst day ever."
He walked away.
No one ever heard from him again.
He disappeared into thin air.
He didn't want to live a life without her.
So he lived a life dedicated to her. //
Jul 11, 2015
Jul 11, 2015 at 4:17 AM UTC
there are reasons
why we do the things we do.
there’s a reason
why you ignore me
when I try my hardest.
there’s a reason why
you chose to love someone else,
even when I love you so much.
there’s a reason why I play
your favorite song over and over
until I remember all the lyrics.
there’s a reason why I love you,
but you don’t love me.
there’s a reason why she plays you,
but I don’t.
there’s a reason why I may not
be the one for you.
there’s a reason for everything,
but we just don’t know it.
just like how –
there’s a reason for you in my life,
but I don’t see it until I lose you.
sometimes things are meant to happen,
and you wonder why,
but that’s just the reason.
if you want to die, don’t go hurting yourself,
just wait because eventually you will
and when you do, you would have done
something or made an impact on someone.
(and that would be your reason to live)
which is why you should stay
for that reason. // dec 29 2013
Mar 14, 2015
Mar 14, 2015 at 2:58 PM UTC
they will remember every single detail
- even things you don’t want them to.
they’ll probably have weird likes
- or fetishes that you may not be able to handle.
they probably won’t sleep at night
- but as day lights, they might fall asleep.
they probably won’t be as social as you would want them to be
- and as a result you guys won’t go out often.
they’ll probably be emotionless unless they’re writing
- and more than likely there’s absolutely nothing
- you would be able to do about that.
whenever you guys argue,
- trust me, your partner will write about it.
whenever you guys kiss,
- make love, anything at all, it will be written about.
dating a writer is a lot of hard work,
if you’re doing it and managing it well, good job! // dec 29 2013
Mar 14, 2015
Mar 14, 2015 at 2:58 PM UTC
you put on your best clothes,
your makeup and everything else
that makes you feel pretty.
when you’re done,
you ‘smile’ and
take selfies.
then you realize
how sad you truly are.
all your smiles
all your laughter,
your eyes,
display sadness.
you begin to wonder where
the happiness you had have gone,
but you have no idea.
you thought you were strong,
but anything someone said about you,
made you cry
and want to die inside.
you were strong
but after everything,
and everyone who left.
you got weak. // dec 12 2013
Mar 14, 2015
Mar 14, 2015 at 2:57 PM UTC