david-adam-johnson
I wanted a way to deal with "everything"... Then i found out "everything" really meant nothing..... I lost everyone close to me in a very short time..... I fell in love and then threw it away..... I cant say im sorry to a child..... This is just a way to spend my nights.... Because during the day I have to be strong.......
Seems like torture when you see me now ...
like a dark corner is more comforting than me....
You will hold my hand and let me in briefly...
but longterm promos are no longer available ...
Mostly im crushed that you like most fed me hope...
But no time for sadness because we are now going slow...
you say ur liking our past more than you will view future..
Like it is of no concern to others where this liffe leads
just hold me tonight and remind me how it felt....
to finally be able to say im going somewhere now,,,
thst she is mine and nothing will tear us apart ...
But then the part i enjoyed most ..
the idea that i could finallly heal my heart .... i
Apr 30, 2017
Apr 30, 2017 at 4:27 AM UTC
When I leave Us ... Maybe its Not so lonely being just i....
Youll be you and Ill be me ......
Not like I wont think of Us ....
But now You are His ..... And you don't believe in Us
I left You with Us and left being just me...
Well we'll meet again when You wanna be us....
And maybe well see If it was worth being Me ....
Will you still love Us like Me?....Will I take you back?...
I Guess we"ll see......
Time will tell my love for now I will wait.... last one k go be you .....
Feb 11, 2017
Feb 11, 2017 at 3:40 AM UTC
Scream so ur voices in my head cease to reveal scarred passion....
Lend me a hand to remind me of the nights I held u tight .....
Simply combine my selfishness with ur broken heart...
I never imagined u hurting when I abandoned hope......
Well I guess cockiness of counterfeit feelings became a joke...
My eyes burn now from the crystal tears down my cheek.....
Its not because I remembet loving you .... losing u made me weak...
But u didnt leave me I broke my heart.....
So maybe kiss my cheek while he waits and I fall apart...
Enjoy it love its what me and you could never find.....
And if you became happy with someone else... I dont mind ...
No more nights of cold shouldered sleep
No more fantasy life or impossible promises to keep....
But when u ask me why im sitting with a smile on my face....
It will be because your happy with him and finally found your place....
Love u Nonaa ..... This is just me Realizing what I lost....
Feb 2, 2017
Feb 2, 2017 at 5:26 AM UTC
Hazy houses only contain helpless hope masked by chemical....
Broken bottles like souls remain at our feet on grimey concrete...
We smile thru deceptive instruction
to rally rebellion .....
And like we challenge ourselves we shuttle towards deadends ....
But this is as happy as we can achieve with tempory friends...
But fatigue and famine contain the way our hell ends....
If we could have just believed in upstairs cellars...
Maybe we wouldnt have eased our way down into lower levels..
But welcome mats litter the basements we exist...
While we take another hit .... I kinda remember the things i miss...
Dec 4, 2016
Dec 4, 2016 at 11:33 AM UTC
I hope your 3am laughter still resonates from somebody else's bedroom....
I pray you seek comfort and try to hide within his arms......
I know he will watch you prepare your beauty unnecessarily.....
I hope like me he gazes at your beauty as the sun comes up and your fast asleep...
Brushes the hair from your face and kisses your skin.....
Knows every curve of your back or scar on your canvas....
How you can be the most beautiful.... when your mouth is full of pizza....
I should have said something when you were still listening to me....
It was still a mystery as to why you chose to love me.....
I hope one day I can love you again but for now my love ...
Your finally free.....
Till we meet again , Love is all I can leave you with....
Nonaa
Nov 26, 2016
Nov 26, 2016 at 4:04 PM UTC
Like distance scarred me and terrorized your perception of my "Perfect Life"....
Like i divorced success and made incomplete failure my wife...
I know im being the **** of jokes not meant to motivate.....
Trust in the fact I disowned love andreluctantly adopted hate.....
My childish belief that you meant me no harm....
Like instead of helping me up you ripped off my arms ....
U say maybe they would like me more....
But every welcome mat to me has been outside the door....
Im ok being entirely by myself... Im not even close to lonely...
So put all ur well wishes online or get off ur *** and phone me.....
U can ask but still I wont give up my digits......
You did way too much damage to ever ****** fix it.....
Remember when i go how much i was Hated.....
And carve my marker with "Life was Truly Overrated"...
Nov 7, 2016
Nov 7, 2016 at 9:07 AM UTC
Paint me a picture of ur pain so i can blend it iinto something beautiful.....
Break every plate glass and emotion over my stupidity so it eases the pain.....
Stare into the cell u are creati g by the actions of wifi wounds u deem harmless....
If i cant remember and you cant forget what was the exact moment we believed......
That thru this madness of chaos I have faith youll never leave...
Nov 5, 2016
Nov 5, 2016 at 12:48 AM UTC
Like every night draws me in like I found warmth in the dark....
The thoughts of what can never be seem less intense...
I can't see all the things I know now I'll dearly miss....
And imagine I'm already gone and all that glitters isn't gold...
Now never walking them down an aisle grants a whimper...
Or being anything but a burden before I say goodbye....
Or now knowing that my goodbyes will only echo in empty rooms...
How I tell myself it's just a bad dream and avoid sleep at all costs...
Now fatigue and disrepair are more evident everyday...
Must be a design of some sort because I leave nothing and no one behind...
And answers that I now know didn't vindicate or hypnotize
I am not going to heaven ... I already know this well...
But compared to my life and an eternity in hell....
I guess the pain isn't over which is worse only time will tell...
Jun 21, 2016
Jun 21, 2016 at 5:18 AM UTC
Tears and tired eyes now became her gaze....
Clouds of vapor and cheap cigarettes are her constant haze...
The anger behind her madness begins to blaze....
And opening her mind reveals her pain soaked maze...
She acts like signs of childhood evaded her grip...
And all the ones she trusted did more than just jump ship ....
So she finds a shield and takes her pill to focus her trip...
And into her oblivion and forget it all I watch her slip...
She sees me as she quits her fight...
And it's me and her against another night...
Jun 9, 2016
Jun 9, 2016 at 9:34 AM UTC
Sunrise and drunk sweats make the day seem futile....
Shaky hands bloodshot eyes and last evenings breath now standard...
Uncomfortable rooms in rented homes make me tense and upset....
When can I go home or at least be blended in to my surroundings....
She the last thing I can call mine lays on our sad mattress ...
And the day begins with a shot of don't remember chased by a drink of they won't notice....
But I'm not gonna be a pity party of one so I put up my middle finger and hide behind expensive lenses ...
My friend and Doctor is now my only thought ...
So I can start this day with no thought of the things and people I forgot...
Please guide my actions and disregard my anger....
Because I'm tired of looking in the mirror and seeing a stranger....
Jun 2, 2016
Jun 2, 2016 at 10:56 AM UTC