When I had you, I didn’t know at the time
what a beautiful thing it was, for you to be mine
Since we parted, I now realize
we stopped before we started,
it was a dead end in disguise
You were the best thing that ever happened to me
I can’t let go the thought of you even though we’re history
Because I lost you,
lost you to another guy
One who makes you happy
& who doesn’t make you cry
Yeah, I lost you & it tears me up inside
I treated you so badly
I wonder how I could have been so blind
When I had you, I tried to change who you were
reconstruct & re-arrange, until the real you was a blur
Broken hearted, it’s a role now reprised
another dear departed, a love I lost that died
The way you held me tight & looked into my eyes
made me feel so loved, it kept me warm inside
The thought of you not there beside me in my life
kills me more & more each day like a stab wound from a knife
Because I lost you,
lost you to another guy
One who makes you happy
& who doesn’t make you cry
Yeah, I lost you & there’s not a day gone by
That I don’t think about you babe,
honey this is not a lie
I’m haunted daily by the memories I have,
There’s no escaping, the ghost that you left behind
I know it’s crazy but my lonely hearts still aching
you were My World, My Light, My Life
Yeah, I lost you,
lost you to another guy
One who makes you happy
& who doesn’t make you cry
Yeah, I lost you & although I try & try
you cannot escape my thoughts,
you are always on my mind
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:49 AM UTC
I miss the friends that I had when I was ten
Growing up is, growing out of
Innocence and people’s lives
Friendships break, like china plates
And I'm all but one of a ten-piece set
Why do people have to change?
Hearts die when they come of age
Youth is lost forever, dead and gone to heaven
Child hood is over now.
I miss the days, when my life was fun and games
Wild and free, so naive
And as reckless as I chose to be.
The more we grow, the more we learn
About life and love, and emotions
Why do people have to change?
Split and go their separate ways
Once the link is severed, it can't be put back together
Child hood is lost somehow
I miss the time, Nan would read me nursery rhymes
Hall lights on, so ghosts are gone
Closet Monsters kept at bay
The past it holds, memories so gold
Precious keepsake times
Of the ones who died
Why do people have to change?
Drift apart till their estranged
If we could endeavour, fight and not surrender
Childhood would stand its ground
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:47 AM UTC
Think I’ll stay in today and just lie in bed
Waste my day, waste away
Maybe I’ll get up around 2 and just junk out on the sofa
But man, it’s so far
It’s like way down the hall in the living room
the dying room
where the space cadet expires room
Subhuman mind wandering, degenerate
suspended in the here and now
Absolution defined by pondering on opiates
repentant look, skin worn and sallow
Depleted mind set, sorrowful hindsight
the motivational lament of a wasted timeline
Mind explorer of inner visions
spell bind aura of my own prison
Self-inflicted fatalism
surrendered soul lost to attrition
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:46 AM UTC
I'm a freak
think I'll join a sideshow
I'll earn my keep
as one of nature’s sick jokes
for your amusement, I'll play along.
On their faces
a look of hatred
afraid of difference, normality is sacred
disfigured mentally
I am your entity.
Self-mutilation
deep cut graffiti
pains my salvation
the razorblade can free me
demented **** up
demented ****** up.
Lost like a child
pure as insecticide
Standing on trial
for being granted human life
condemned for breathing,
sorry for living.
Scar Cushion Geek
carnival freak
Type cast/out cast by society
No place for **** ups
demented **** ups
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:45 AM UTC
I guess it’s true what they say
about blondes having more fun
If you’re sad & feel grey
then she’ll liven you up
Make you smile when you’re starting to frown
pick you up, when the World brings you down
Like a Christmas Angel at the top of the tree
she shines like a rainbow in the air that I breathe
Innocent like fresh falls of snow
don’t ever let your innocence go
Hayley Powell
can you show me how
Not to take life too seriously
because I want to laugh not scowl
When a favour’s in question, it’s hard to say no!
you can’t help but save her from the perils of woe
She could charm the birds right out of the trees
unite the World with her laughter & peace
Hayley Powell
can you show me how
Not to sink in misery
because I want to float not drown
She don’t get out the wrong side of bed
she resembles Phoebe from the comedy Friends
Like the Moon that glows when all else is dark
she’s the happiness I lack in my heart
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:42 AM UTC
Father do you know my name
Do you know me at all?
How is it we’re not the same
Yet identical?
Rotten apple of your eye
Your footsteps I'll not tread
No words I know of to describe
Years gone I've wished you dead
Looking in the mirror
I see not myself
It’s your face that I'm now wearing
Your hands that I've been dealt
Father do you know my age?
Do you know how old I am?
Could you tell me at what stage?
I became a man?
Forgotten offspring, out of sight
Out of mind, neglect
A reject bin baby born of lies
Is easier to forget
Father do you feel ashamed
Do you have regrets?
Creating life is not some game
You put on as a bet
Error of your double life
A guilty secret kept
Already married with a wife
Familiarity breeds contempt
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:42 AM UTC
Less than zero feeling
Crestfallen,
disbelieving
The tears & pain of grieving
The life that never was
Monumental heartbreak
Transcending soul to Heaven’s gate
A better place where Nanny waits
For the life that never was
Questions asked,
a futile act
Genesis masked by eternal nap
The hole that’s left to fill your gap
Of a life that never was
One day we’ll eventually meet
And marvel at what could’ve been
A Lifetime of love from your mum and me
God bless my child rest in peace
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:41 AM UTC
I think about you more now
than when you was alive
and I hate myself for that.
I hate that
I always took you being there for granted
and didn’t visit as much as I should of.
People would always say
“you’ll regret it when she dies”
but I was young (and knew everything).
I knew the time would eventually come
when I would have to mourn you
and I tried to prepare myself for that day.
But nothing can prepare you,
not for losing someone
who’s the reason for your own existence
(without you, there would be no me).
I’m glad I took the time
to get to know you, to hear your stories.
My Childhood memories of you
were some of the happiest moments in my life and I feel a great sense of comfort and security reminiscing about times past.
Even the smallest of things
evoke such a magical sense of pacification.
Watching Wimbledon tennis on a lazy summer afternoon.
A chicken sandwich(sprinkled with a pinch of salt)
for the journey on the fast train to the Seaside
and even a hall light left on as reassurance for the young child that it will warn off things that go bump in the night.
I think about all you’ve been through in life,
A World War, Marriage/Divorce,
all the friends and family you’ve loved and lost
(how do you recover from something like that without losing a piece of who you are?)
I was so ecstatic telling you I was going to be a dad
and so very empty and distraught
when we lost the baby to God’s wrath.
I really wanted to make you a Great Grandmother
before life timed out…
The Teddy Bear you bought my child
is like a priceless treasure
(and will be looked after and loved forever)
as will the Wedding ring your wore for 72 years,
for better and worse,
now safely on my fifth digit
and following my journey through life
They say “time is a great healer” I disagree.
All time does is show you how precious each given moment
with the people we love is.
You never forgot and never stop loving them,
you just slowly learn to let go and accept the fact
they’re no longer of this world but forever in our hearts
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:40 AM UTC
Don't try to understand
how a harmers mind works,
You’ll never figure it out.
It’s so much more about when life really hurts,
Can’t find the reason your down
Cut myself to feel good
The blade enhances my mood
The quick release from each wound
So the suffering ends
Funny feeling, hard to describe,
It slowly eats at your soul
Spreads and multiplies till it’s fully inscribed
Now you’ve got no self-control
Cut myself to feel good
The blade enhances my mood
A painful decrease withstood
So the suffering ends
Dark little secret twisted and sick
The marks you bare over time
A mental weakness that’s got you in a fix
Personal Jekyll and Hyde
Cut myself to feel good
The blade enhances my mood
Appease the Demons of doom
So the suffering ends
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:35 AM UTC
Cold sweat breaks
my breath draws thin
Can’t think straight
what I’m doing
Hesitate, my mouth is dry
I’m afraid that I might die
Mind warped by poisonous thoughts
cut to the quick & distraught
Sickness feeling in my gut,
cold with fear, but burning up
Legs start shaking, knees they knock
nerves are fraying, round the clock
Mind warped by poisonous thoughts
Cut to the quick & distraught
Brainwaves send me out a fax
stop me dead right in my tracks
My endorphins are diseased
feed on my low self esteem
Mind warped by poisonous thoughts
Cut to the quick & distraught
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 8:33 AM UTC