1.) I'm tired of lighting cigarettes and joints when I really just want to light my insides on fire.
2.) I'm tired of kissing boring girls and boring boys in hopes of feeling something other than this eternal silence inside of me.
3.) I'm tired of drinking 20 cups of black coffee hoping the caffeine will stop my heart.
4.) I'm tired of taking blue pills, snorting white lines, shots of ***** and **** rips to hold me over for a couple hours.
5.) I'm really ******* tired of shaking between highs, head between my knees, heart pounding, breaking into a cold sweat.
I'm tired of being an addict.
Apr 30, 2015
Apr 30, 2015 at 7:08 PM UTC
i'm very sorry that i haven't posted in a while, i've been in rehab for drug addiction. all of your support and kind comments made me smile so big when i logged on here. thank you all, i'll start posting again very soon.
peace out <3
Apr 29, 2015
Apr 29, 2015 at 8:48 PM UTC
there's a certain beauty in the unknown.
a certain beauty in not knowing if
you're as crazy about me as i am about you.
there's a certain beauty in knowing that
my heart is tied up in such a knot that even
a seasoned boy-scout would cringe at the sight of it,
all because of you.
so many nights i have spent looking at the moon,
hoping you were doing the same.
and oh-so many nights have been spent swallowing
pills with various numbers inscribed on their very surface,
just to try to forget about your absence.
but the thing about the unknown and drugs and the moon
is that none of them can even come close to the beauty
that you possess.
May 30, 2014
May 30, 2014 at 3:32 PM UTC
I stumbled into a world
where good vs. evil was routine;
where cards were alive, cats talked,
and a strange man asked me to tea.
I was young and forgetful,
the memory faded away
then one day I fell again
chasing a rabbit with a familiar face.
I was confused
my destiny once again unclear
a peculiar catterpillar
told me what was to appear.
If I shall fall again,
and be given another test
I hope the question is
"how is a raven like a writing desk?"
May 28, 2014
May 28, 2014 at 9:37 AM UTC
i fell in love with you.
not after we spoke for hours on the phone
and not after i fell asleep in your arms
and not after you sang me a song to
help me sleep.
but when we kissed it was the sweetest taste
of your lips stained with coffee and tattooed
with the taste of cigarettes and *****
they told me a story about you without
using words...
and that's crazy, isn't it?
i fell in love with you before you said a word to me.
and it wasn't your perfectly placed brown hair or
your eyes that glistened under the sun,
but it was how you could tell me a story without even
opening your mouth.
May 24, 2014
May 24, 2014 at 4:21 PM UTC
when i was younger my parents
warned me about the kinds of drugs you could snort
into your system through your gentle little nose,
the kind you drink like alcohol
and the ones you inject straight into your
veins.
but the one thing they forgot to warn me about
were drugs like you.
May 24, 2014
May 24, 2014 at 4:14 PM UTC