courtney-hooper - Hello Poetry

you shun me in our heat you turn, don’t laugh. smiles crease your lids, trying to hide it. but on the fireside i see the flames freckle your moonlit face. glanced eyes break when they meet. timetables and time souring my glower-grace. and then walking away, you’ve pulled that card again. does the neglect keep you honest, when the early hours made you cheat. the fear blossoms in crimson and you laid hands, ***** sinner. do try to repent— it doesn’t make it go away. i’ve lessened in height since December, climbing the ladders asking for heaven in dreams. (you are heaven to me.) unreachable. a siren in flames, voice not sweet but piercing i will sing to you until the ships come in dismantled and burning board by board i want to destroy you devour your living soul call me fate in dust industrial war, or spectral spirit to haunt you, a plague there’s no antibiotics for. you’ll deny me to your master but can’t can’t shake it off i see your eyes in the fire creased with your smile try to shake it try. you shun me in our heat but i’ll still know you in the embers love you from a distance keep my place in the shadows. just as the future calls for me, it calls for you whether hell or heaven you’ll beg for me again, and i will make you answer, suffer for your sins.

0

May 3, 2018

May 3, 2018 at 8:38 AM UTC

unholy

you shun me in our heat you turn, don’t laugh. smiles crease your lids, trying to hide it. but on the fireside i see the flames freckle your moonlit face. glanced eyes break when they meet. timetables and time souring my glower-grace. and then walking away, you’ve pulled that card again. does the neglect keep you honest, when the early hours made you cheat. the fear blossoms in crimson and you laid hands, ***** sinner. do try to repent— it doesn’t make it go away. i’ve lessened in height since December, climbing the ladders asking for heaven in dreams. (you are heaven to me.) unreachable. a siren in flames, voice not sweet but piercing i will sing to you until the ships come in dismantled and burning board by board i want to destroy you devour your living soul call me fate in dust industrial war, or spectral spirit to haunt you, a plague there’s no antibiotics for. you’ll deny me to your master but can’t can’t shake it off i see your eyes in the fire creased with your smile try to shake it try. you shun me in our heat but i’ll still know you in the embers love you from a distance keep my place in the shadows. just as the future calls for me, it calls for you whether hell or heaven you’ll beg for me again, and i will make you answer, suffer for your sins.

52

at the violet hour when your eyes turn to me like a vulture preying i hear your voice like sawdust spraying off the back of the blades you’re making your way towards me i duck i run i put the distance between us it’s never for pleasure like a game of chess and no one’s the winner. your slurred words call out for one more moment but i know, i know… at the violet hour when i let you in again your chainsaw talons on my skin my breath sparks like a shower mid-July, the tarot tower— every city falls to ashes. and i cry and i cry to Marie she tells me it’s just your temperament frigid and burning you leave me turning in circles creating a story out of silence: i pretend you love me at the violet hour when the cars pull up the driveway i see your truck shudder your lazuli eyes to follow i know you’ll fill me again or leave me hollow. a vermin on the roadside to do with as you wish.

0

Apr 27, 2018

Apr 27, 2018 at 7:51 AM UTC

xvi: vulture-vermin

at the violet hour when your eyes turn to me like a vulture preying i hear your voice like sawdust spraying off the back of the blades you’re making your way towards me i duck i run i put the distance between us it’s never for pleasure like a game of chess and no one’s the winner. your slurred words call out for one more moment but i know, i know… at the violet hour when i let you in again your chainsaw talons on my skin my breath sparks like a shower mid-July, the tarot tower— every city falls to ashes. and i cry and i cry to Marie she tells me it’s just your temperament frigid and burning you leave me turning in circles creating a story out of silence: i pretend you love me at the violet hour when the cars pull up the driveway i see your truck shudder your lazuli eyes to follow i know you’ll fill me again or leave me hollow. a vermin on the roadside to do with as you wish.

35

i’ve watched the fragments fall. your calloused fingers hold the chisel close but never enough to completely split in two. porcelain skin chipped, unrecognizable by now. i stood as still as a statuette, i’ve allowed this every minute, disregarded the repercussions just to be beside you only to be beside you forming a pile of shards beside you. your warm, rough hands and fixed eyes, mind set to destroy me, watch me crumble, do nothing. scatter me across the places where we would meet: the fire pit, the dim lit street, the padded arm of the love seat. a painted glass life was never enough, could never be enough. but to be beside you…

0

Apr 19, 2018

Apr 19, 2018 at 5:52 AM UTC

ceramics

i’ve watched the fragments fall. your calloused fingers hold the chisel close but never enough to completely split in two. porcelain skin chipped, unrecognizable by now. i stood as still as a statuette, i’ve allowed this every minute, disregarded the repercussions just to be beside you only to be beside you forming a pile of shards beside you. your warm, rough hands and fixed eyes, mind set to destroy me, watch me crumble, do nothing. scatter me across the places where we would meet: the fire pit, the dim lit street, the padded arm of the love seat. a painted glass life was never enough, could never be enough. but to be beside you…

28

i wish i could see you without me rubbing the dust off of your feet. your tired eyes and pale skin, i wonder if they’re colored differently. without me. this is the life that you chose. you wake in the morning alone. you go home at night alone. without me. i wonder how you breathe through thin lips and crooked nose and how it is you sleep after putting so many beers down your throat. in my memory, your cold fingers in december: over my jawline, in my shirt, across every crescent. i felt each callous on my pores. your scent seeped into me through my bloodstream— i was hooked. i told you i couldn’t wait, all but begged you to choose me, i wanted to spend my life with you. even worse, i still do. i wish i could see you without me. are you happy? do you smile? does your laugh rumble the way it used to, the dimples in your cheeks forming parentheses? without me.

0

Apr 19, 2018

Apr 19, 2018 at 5:39 AM UTC

Untitled

i wish i could see you without me rubbing the dust off of your feet. your tired eyes and pale skin, i wonder if they’re colored differently. without me. this is the life that you chose. you wake in the morning alone. you go home at night alone. without me. i wonder how you breathe through thin lips and crooked nose and how it is you sleep after putting so many beers down your throat. in my memory, your cold fingers in december: over my jawline, in my shirt, across every crescent. i felt each callous on my pores. your scent seeped into me through my bloodstream— i was hooked. i told you i couldn’t wait, all but begged you to choose me, i wanted to spend my life with you. even worse, i still do. i wish i could see you without me. are you happy? do you smile? does your laugh rumble the way it used to, the dimples in your cheeks forming parentheses? without me.

34

it all spewed from your mouth like boiling hot coffee falling to the ground you slipped me the cue, showing angles on the green equations, calculations, you said it was easy everything is easy to you you spoke of flight patterns and aerial views you didn’t mention the airsickness nor the dramamine pills you drawled on and on and the smoke rose to the top smoke from the cigarette, steam from the coffee *** a certain number of hours, you said, was all you would need as i held the wooden stick and missed the ball again.

0

Mar 11, 2018

Mar 11, 2018 at 3:11 PM UTC

pilot

it all spewed from your mouth like boiling hot coffee falling to the ground you slipped me the cue, showing angles on the green equations, calculations, you said it was easy everything is easy to you you spoke of flight patterns and aerial views you didn’t mention the airsickness nor the dramamine pills you drawled on and on and the smoke rose to the top smoke from the cigarette, steam from the coffee *** a certain number of hours, you said, was all you would need as i held the wooden stick and missed the ball again.

16

we watched for the Perseids by a fire on the lawn that was before i knew all those late night talks would turn into something that i cannot turn off we watched for the Perseids while Denver sang about roads that was before i felt it every star falling to the ground burning through our skin we couldn’t stop it this is our fate shooting through the skies close, but never together disintentegrating every time

0

Mar 11, 2018

Mar 11, 2018 at 2:27 PM UTC

waxing gibbous 56%

we watched for the Perseids by a fire on the lawn that was before i knew all those late night talks would turn into something that i cannot turn off we watched for the Perseids while Denver sang about roads that was before i felt it every star falling to the ground burning through our skin we couldn’t stop it this is our fate shooting through the skies close, but never together disintentegrating every time

16

Your hands arachnid Crawling over me- Bristled and viscous, Venomous and binding. You wove patterns Under my skin. Beautiful and unnerving, The silken threads cover me. Those terrible eyes haunt my dreams, My chest pierced by fanged teeth. You left me in your web to wait. I can't escape what you have made.

0

Jan 25, 2018

Jan 25, 2018 at 4:32 PM UTC

Arachnid

Your hands arachnid Crawling over me- Bristled and viscous, Venomous and binding. You wove patterns Under my skin. Beautiful and unnerving, The silken threads cover me. Those terrible eyes haunt my dreams, My chest pierced by fanged teeth. You left me in your web to wait. I can't escape what you have made.

12

i can fall in love knees awkward trembling you shivered beside my car parked on the lawn drunk at 4AM kissed forehead neck cheeks eyes brow jaw i don’t mind clumsy boots don’t even mind thick southern drawl i heard what i wanted to hear you were jealous in the garage attracted to my jawline and the way my face spreads when i smile you kept cursing as i sat upon your hips and licked your tongue raw expletives rolling from your lips onto mine air mattress in guest room you laid my glasses on the floor and held my skin until it bled onto calloused fingertips sore with the guilt of our actions your infidelity but both of our need i can fall in love with anything

0

Dec 18, 2017

Dec 18, 2017 at 6:02 AM UTC

Untitled

i can fall in love knees awkward trembling you shivered beside my car parked on the lawn drunk at 4AM kissed forehead neck cheeks eyes brow jaw i don’t mind clumsy boots don’t even mind thick southern drawl i heard what i wanted to hear you were jealous in the garage attracted to my jawline and the way my face spreads when i smile you kept cursing as i sat upon your hips and licked your tongue raw expletives rolling from your lips onto mine air mattress in guest room you laid my glasses on the floor and held my skin until it bled onto calloused fingertips sore with the guilt of our actions your infidelity but both of our need i can fall in love with anything

27

once the sun met the moon as we sat on a mountain cliff it felt like years our moments my moon-silk and midnights your burning eyes and fire days i felt the earth move rolling its weight under the dusty rocks my lungs contracted, my chest expands still, to think i may be hollow like a bell while you burn through energy and cast it away. once we could have danced it was a thursday afternoon but the rain soaked through my first-date blouse and it all ended way too soon.

0

Dec 10, 2017

Dec 10, 2017 at 5:15 AM UTC

Aug. 21

once the sun met the moon as we sat on a mountain cliff it felt like years our moments my moon-silk and midnights your burning eyes and fire days i felt the earth move rolling its weight under the dusty rocks my lungs contracted, my chest expands still, to think i may be hollow like a bell while you burn through energy and cast it away. once we could have danced it was a thursday afternoon but the rain soaked through my first-date blouse and it all ended way too soon.

18

i lie beside the open window and let droplets from the storm spray down upon the crystal clear slither of skin, wrist and arm, holding the curtain ajar. i hear the notes like pirouettes, the clatter on the faded brick. it all comes clean with the storm. collected like lost summer days i sat waiting on your return. and into pores, through blood stream, i let it in like you like the window open wide as most were simple streams, it and you were the tide. mostly closing signs. how long can droplets form crystal clear moonlit storm semi-circular on skin why did i let it in? but vast, the mountain-valley-sea. the northern-south, western-east. like window, mouth, my star-ly speech i spoke in circles, or patterned veils connecting points of light into darkened clouds. let rest what lies, let stand what weaves colored perfume, the sprinkled streets the path before and the rift between. i saw the sin long ago curl within and build its nest but this window only works one way.

0

Nov 26, 2017

Nov 26, 2017 at 9:36 PM UTC

exorcism

i lie beside the open window and let droplets from the storm spray down upon the crystal clear slither of skin, wrist and arm, holding the curtain ajar. i hear the notes like pirouettes, the clatter on the faded brick. it all comes clean with the storm. collected like lost summer days i sat waiting on your return. and into pores, through blood stream, i let it in like you like the window open wide as most were simple streams, it and you were the tide. mostly closing signs. how long can droplets form crystal clear moonlit storm semi-circular on skin why did i let it in? but vast, the mountain-valley-sea. the northern-south, western-east. like window, mouth, my star-ly speech i spoke in circles, or patterned veils connecting points of light into darkened clouds. let rest what lies, let stand what weaves colored perfume, the sprinkled streets the path before and the rift between. i saw the sin long ago curl within and build its nest but this window only works one way.

32