For I have always
sought to shun the alleys
where my shadows stretch too high,
ever hesitant to linger on
dialogs without outcomes,
too tangled and far-reaching,
for I foresee the fall of me,
and how the quicksand
born of thoughts ensnares me,
crippling, pleading for mercy.
I have been sprinting for far too long,
haunted by the specter of what
I will not be,
or for what I mould me to be
for I am not
what you perceive me to be.
Dec 23, 2024
Dec 23, 2024 at 12:16 AM UTC
There is nothing but darkness here
And rot that fills the air,
Every day I cross murals of my yesterday
And memories I cannot bear,
Dwindling and shattering asking
To why I'm so fragile.
Fragile
I've lived inside a broken shell,
Cracked and leaking
spilling on those who come too close,
I always run away
But no matter how far I go
I cannot escape my fate.
Fate
That binds me to this self-loath
Where flies are my only friends,
This stench that I cannot endure
But now I know too well,
A slave to my misery
A king of this empty hell.
Hell
To offer up my life to the noose
that hangs around my neck,
never tight enough to end this
But with every breath I clench
Reminds me of my worthlessness.
Worthlessness
A burden to my own mind
A wall to my questions of being
Hollow yet overflowing
I've seen enough to know
This tunnel has no end in sight
The light has failed to reach what’s inside.
Feb 8, 2024
Feb 8, 2024 at 11:17 PM UTC
Fishing for impudence
looking outside,
all seem so murky
with a dying light,
all seem so monochrome,
with a condescending benight.
Now I am looking closely
and all that I found,
was a hatred very symmetric,
to which I am bound.
Just like the voids
I see in myself,
maybe my lens is too murky,
or my windows blacked out,
but life is miserable
and I see it around.
I often try to deny,
and live like everything’s fine,
but some feelings never settle,
some actions don’t suffice.
I look for answers around
I look for meanings behind,
maybe it’s a different me,
or maybe it’s the defeated mind.
Thoughts never to settle,
when I write sometimes,
but facing your fears,
through the words you write
is more difficult than accepting the light.
I often try to view this,
in a stupidly optimistic hue,
thinking like a flower
proud of its scent and bloom.
Thinking I am unique and
so might be my issues,
but I don’t want to look around
cause inside I know,
I am part of the million others
that bloomed and withered in this garden too.
My problems don’t amount
to the privileges I own,
and pain might be puny
when compared to yours,
but I still get hurt,
even if my problems aren’t new,
I still want to say them,
even when my words are few.
Nov 8, 2021
Nov 8, 2021 at 1:56 PM UTC
All feelings inside create a meaning,
if you are patient enough to explore them.
These small reasons around us,
we fail to grasp their beauty.
We often fail to hear them
either we are not receptive enough
or have grown immune to them
either we are too blind to appreciate,
or they might have evolved
too fast for us to comprehend.
More than often we hear,
“you won’t understand”,
still a paradox in itself,
a question with answers unknown.
How to truly decipher the emotions
that our words fail to express.
The true meaning behind a tear,
the true intention of a silence,
the true pain behind separation.
This animosity created due to ignorance,
indeed is the greatest bliss,
less to decipher when
only a few meanings exist.
It’s just fine,
some emotions are beyond us,
beyond your words and actions.
impossible to capsulate,
monumental to appreciate.
It’s just fine
if often people don’t understand you,
It’s just fine
if often people don’t find your answers.
It’s just fine
if incoherence exists,
just like the immaculate idea of the dark of the moon,
beauty beyond comprehension.
Gives you a chance to create
a unique one for your own,
the one only you could appreciate.
Jun 14, 2021
Jun 14, 2021 at 10:34 AM UTC
All these changes inside bring a new canvas,
the one catered with an address to your soul,
granting you a chance to explore the new shades,
those colours that you are too afraid to mix,
those colours you are forbidden to mix,
colours that seem to fit in your canvas.
Learn to evolve in those feelings,
accept those colours and see,
if the outcome is a blank feeling,
or a rainbow of hope,
a feeling that your identity,
reciprocates the colours of your soul.
Jun 2, 2021
Jun 2, 2021 at 8:51 AM UTC
Power is pleasure
but pleasure can always end up toxic.
State blames the power,
the power is a slave to the money,
money running this nation,
Man-made paper running Man.
Apr 30, 2021
Apr 30, 2021 at 2:54 PM UTC
It's all a fallacy, this game we play.
With nothing much to lose,
and oddities to gain.
Dirt drenched kisses linger longer on the lips of shadows.
As the sun chases their nights away,
concocting different tomorrows.
In the passing of life,
we cross over with strife.
Shadows and ghosts dine as friends in hell.
But above the ground,
oh, they keep their separate shells.
Humans live in their shells,
shells of lie, love and lust.
With nothing to give back to one another,
nothing but long lines of agony and despair.
Apr 19, 2021
Apr 19, 2021 at 2:50 PM UTC
Chloroforming your joys,
disappearing in noise.
Writing to a feeling,
lost with a pen unpoised.
Corner lights fluorescent yellow,
the poisonous sweet smell of love so mellow.
Quit being a slave to a nameless voice,
let your today,
be a regretless choice.
Mar 29, 2021
Mar 29, 2021 at 10:29 AM UTC
Try to live once,
for the sake of now,
you have your today
try to live it now.
Count your tears,
the ones from yesterday,
the ones that dried up,
the ones that froze away.
Do you feel your heart beating?
or do you feel it slowly fade,
an unusual absence of warmth,
fearing it might become a nameless mail.
Chloroforming your joys,
disappearing in noise.
Writing to a feeling,
lost with a pen unpoised.
Corner lights fluorescent yellow,
the poisonous sweet smell of love so mellow.
Quit being slave to a nameless voice,
let your today,
be a regretless choice.
Learn to live,
enjoy it in endless ways.
Life is beautiful,
try to live your dreams every day.
Mar 29, 2021
Mar 29, 2021 at 9:59 AM UTC
Emotions from beyond are slowly seeping in,
spilling over my conscious,
dripping on my skin.
I want to taste it on your lips,
I want to hear it when you breathe.
I have scaled every beat you missed,
I have heard your whispers and whims,
still familiar with what are your needs in play.
Your lips feel like ripples on my neck,
divine interventions I cannot say.
Unlike any twilight skies I have seen,
your beauty is the only hue
I cannot unsee.
All I want is you right now,
this need is killing me now.
Waiting,
with my emotions in chains,
if I let them fly,
you might forget the lines
of lust and pain.
You are the only one,
to quench my thirst
so, make me wait no more
or else the demons might lose their cage,
the chains might fade with age,
you won’t be able to hold me back,
once the chains unclutter,
It’s either you till dawn or
or until I have you for supper.
Let me hold you close,
Let me hear you say,
“I will cleanse you of your sins,
the sins in love you are too afraid to say
the sins from our timeless yesterday.”
Mar 17, 2021
Mar 17, 2021 at 11:32 AM UTC