cleo-younce - Hello Poetry

Depression use to be something that happened for no reason with me... I had no clue why I wanted to just lay in bed all day... I had no clue why I didn't want to eat... I had no clue why I didn't want to talk to anyone... Now I know why... I don't want to get out of bed because I know I'm not going to talk to him... I don't want to eat because I miss him so much... I don't want to talk to anyone because I can't talk to him.. The reason I am depressed is because I realized that he is my life... Without him I don't breathe... Without him it feels like a knife is in my chest... Without him I want to stay in bed all day, every day... Without him I don't eat... Without him I don't sleep... Before I was confused why these things were happening to me.. Now I know why they are happening... He is my life He is my everything Without him I am nothing Nobody I am... Depressed

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Jun 7, 2015

Jun 7, 2015 at 6:08 PM UTC

Depression

Depression use to be something that happened for no reason with me... I had no clue why I wanted to just lay in bed all day... I had no clue why I didn't want to eat... I had no clue why I didn't want to talk to anyone... Now I know why... I don't want to get out of bed because I know I'm not going to talk to him... I don't want to eat because I miss him so much... I don't want to talk to anyone because I can't talk to him.. The reason I am depressed is because I realized that he is my life... Without him I don't breathe... Without him it feels like a knife is in my chest... Without him I want to stay in bed all day, every day... Without him I don't eat... Without him I don't sleep... Before I was confused why these things were happening to me.. Now I know why they are happening... He is my life He is my everything Without him I am nothing Nobody I am... Depressed

23

Without you... It's like a knife in my chest It's like someone is punching me over and over again It's like my whole world is falling apart I want to curl up into a ball I want to cry myself to sleep I can't sleep I can't stop crying I can't breathe I can't concentrate I have a fake smile I have a fake laugh I have empty conversations But when I'm talking to you... It's like I have a heart beat It's like nothing can hurt me It's like my world is finally coming together I want to cuddle with you I want to cry from happiness I can finally sleep I can finally stop crying I can finally breathe I can finally concentrate I have a real smile I have a real laugh I have meaningful conversations I'm.... Happy I'm.... Me I'm.... In love

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Jun 1, 2015

Jun 1, 2015 at 10:50 PM UTC

LOVE

Without you... It's like a knife in my chest It's like someone is punching me over and over again It's like my whole world is falling apart I want to curl up into a ball I want to cry myself to sleep I can't sleep I can't stop crying I can't breathe I can't concentrate I have a fake smile I have a fake laugh I have empty conversations But when I'm talking to you... It's like I have a heart beat It's like nothing can hurt me It's like my world is finally coming together I want to cuddle with you I want to cry from happiness I can finally sleep I can finally stop crying I can finally breathe I can finally concentrate I have a real smile I have a real laugh I have meaningful conversations I'm.... Happy I'm.... Me I'm.... In love

29

I never knew just how alone I really was till just now... I didn't feel alone when I had the razors and the knifes... I didn't feel alone with the pills and the drugs... I didn't feel alone when I lay talking to him at night... I didn't feel alone talking to her during the day... But now... I feel alone because I don't have the razors or the knifes... I feel alone because I don't have the pills and the drugs... I feel alone because I don't have him to lay and talk to at night... I feel alone because I don't have her to talk to during the day... Things have changed... Now I only feel alone when music isn't playing... When he isn't talking to me... When she isn't in bed with me... I never knew what the feeling of alone was...

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Jan 29, 2015

Jan 29, 2015 at 9:30 PM UTC

Alone

I never knew just how alone I really was till just now... I didn't feel alone when I had the razors and the knifes... I didn't feel alone with the pills and the drugs... I didn't feel alone when I lay talking to him at night... I didn't feel alone talking to her during the day... But now... I feel alone because I don't have the razors or the knifes... I feel alone because I don't have the pills and the drugs... I feel alone because I don't have him to lay and talk to at night... I feel alone because I don't have her to talk to during the day... Things have changed... Now I only feel alone when music isn't playing... When he isn't talking to me... When she isn't in bed with me... I never knew what the feeling of alone was...

15

Every day I wake up in bed I can still feel your hot breath running down my neck I slowly slide my hand under my pillow Trying to make it seem like natural movement My heart begins to race when it's not there My knife I keep hidden for when you are to return Suddenly I feel the familiar cold blade Layed gently on my shoulder With a kiss I knew could only come from your lips As it slides down my arm I hear you say "You don't need this, your safe now. No one will hurt you, I'm here." I wanted to say "Your the one I'm afraid of..." But I couldn't get the words out. Closing my eyes I search again... This time I find the knife. I hear someone saying my name Shaking me, telling me to get up... The hands came again This time I woke up only to see that it was not you That I was safe, and that I didn't need the knife Yet still I slid it back beneath my pillow Letting it sit there till the next morning Knowing, I'd feel you there again.

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Oct 5, 2014

Oct 5, 2014 at 1:13 AM UTC

Terror

Every day I wake up in bed I can still feel your hot breath running down my neck I slowly slide my hand under my pillow Trying to make it seem like natural movement My heart begins to race when it's not there My knife I keep hidden for when you are to return Suddenly I feel the familiar cold blade Layed gently on my shoulder With a kiss I knew could only come from your lips As it slides down my arm I hear you say "You don't need this, your safe now. No one will hurt you, I'm here." I wanted to say "Your the one I'm afraid of..." But I couldn't get the words out. Closing my eyes I search again... This time I find the knife. I hear someone saying my name Shaking me, telling me to get up... The hands came again This time I woke up only to see that it was not you That I was safe, and that I didn't need the knife Yet still I slid it back beneath my pillow Letting it sit there till the next morning Knowing, I'd feel you there again.

23

"I've had no dreams only nightmares; wake up screaming in the dark. No one sees the tears I cry, because when I cry I hide in this place I call a life, when really all it is are lies you pretend are the truth." "He said he loved me, when all he wanted to do was ___ me; treat me like his queen, as long as I'll still get down on my knees. You said you loved me; I said please, you wouldn't be here if I wasn't on my knees. If you did love me, you'd say honey, in 4 years you can call me, in tell then I am sorry. Good bye is what you'd say when all I would hear is I love you. That's what you'd do if you loved me. And now what I didn't realize till the fog was gone, the one who really loves me has been here all along. You've been there in my mind, you've been here in my heart; instead of trusting him I should have fell into your arms. And now I see that the person who truly loves me, is the women who still hugs me. She may not have been there when I was young, But the she's the person who still trusts me even though I've done wrong. And I love her, and all who's been there for me when I wasn't strong. Who turned the nightmare I was in, into a dream that I live." "I've had no nightmares only dreams, because I wake up every morning, to the people who still love me."

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Oct 3, 2014

Oct 3, 2014 at 8:22 PM UTC

Untitled

"I've had no dreams only nightmares; wake up screaming in the dark. No one sees the tears I cry, because when I cry I hide in this place I call a life, when really all it is are lies you pretend are the truth." "He said he loved me, when all he wanted to do was ___ me; treat me like his queen, as long as I'll still get down on my knees. You said you loved me; I said please, you wouldn't be here if I wasn't on my knees. If you did love me, you'd say honey, in 4 years you can call me, in tell then I am sorry. Good bye is what you'd say when all I would hear is I love you. That's what you'd do if you loved me. And now what I didn't realize till the fog was gone, the one who really loves me has been here all along. You've been there in my mind, you've been here in my heart; instead of trusting him I should have fell into your arms. And now I see that the person who truly loves me, is the women who still hugs me. She may not have been there when I was young, But the she's the person who still trusts me even though I've done wrong. And I love her, and all who's been there for me when I wasn't strong. Who turned the nightmare I was in, into a dream that I live." "I've had no nightmares only dreams, because I wake up every morning, to the people who still love me."

9

Going through life's history I see this man staring back at me with beady eyes as black as black can be And when I wonder what he thinks all I can see are the streets No warmth just cold When people see him they scold Finding happiness nowhere while finding death everywhere Streets are where I belong Sometimes sleeping on the earth's hard ground wondering where my life has gone Going through life's history I see a man staring back at me wondering where happiness might be

0

Sep 28, 2014

Sep 28, 2014 at 4:08 PM UTC

Into my life

Going through life's history I see this man staring back at me with beady eyes as black as black can be And when I wonder what he thinks all I can see are the streets No warmth just cold When people see him they scold Finding happiness nowhere while finding death everywhere Streets are where I belong Sometimes sleeping on the earth's hard ground wondering where my life has gone Going through life's history I see a man staring back at me wondering where happiness might be

15