christopher-bales
American
I love cooking. / / I love working on computers. / / I love comic books, science fiction, and superheroes. / / Born on April 26th, 1991 to two incredibly supportive people, Neta and John, I have resided in Kansas for the entirety of my life. / / I have been fortunate enough to travel to many different parts of the United States, though my dreams and aspirations extend much further than my home. / / Good food, awesome friends, an awesome boyfriend, a supportive family, foreign films, animé, manga, comic books, Warehouse 13, Heroes, Sanctuary, internet access, music, wine, a daily dose of sarcasm, and late nights keep me from going insane. / / http://ageotropic.tumblr.com/
But in a way,
it didn't even feel like a week.
It felt like
years
and
seconds
at the same time
…you know?
Everything felt
so right
and it felt
as if we had known each other for ages,
but at the same time it felt
like everything was over in a split second.
I guess…
that's what love
does to you, though.
Aug 30, 2012
Aug 30, 2012 at 7:04 PM UTC
The sound of thunder
is washing against
a sleepless horizon, again…
And while days
and miles and minutes
and all of the waters of the North Atlantic
separate your body from
lying next to mine,
painting the perfect picture of
soulful symmetry that I’ve been
craving to know for the longest time,
for even half of a fickle moment,
if I can hear your heartbeat against
my ear and feel the warmth of
your body against my back
and the embrace of your arms
wrapped tightly around my frame,
banishing every insecurity from
the corners of my mind…
If I can feel grounded in your presence,
even for just a moment…
And know that I’m not a puppet,
rigged up as a marionette by my own emotions,
strung out on bad dreams and decisions, they’re just
bad schemes that I’ve never learned to fight off,
or dry off from these ******
depressive states soaking into my skin
like dollar store sanitizers, leaving my
skin burning, and my soul yearning to
be clean from the agony that others have
left behind, I just want simple peace of mind,
so that maybe, when the sun isn't shining and the sky is overcast
I don’t start drifting into the past,
and I don’t lose myself again…
If I can feel grounded in your presence,
even just for a moment…
Then maybe...
Just maybe...
The sound of the thunder
washing against the horizon
won’t keep me awake at night…
Aug 5, 2012
Aug 5, 2012 at 12:53 AM UTC
Sometimes I
feel like I’ve given
you too much control
over my heart and
head, while I’m
just lying here,
in the dark
waiting for a
response that will
probably never come
and answers that will never
lay my worst fears to rest.
But for
some reason,
I can’t stop saying
I love you, even
when it feels a
bit hollow as
it echoes out
of my lips.
But I can’t
let you hear
that I’m doubting
the things between us
because I know just how
much you’ve given up
for me and just how
much of my heart
I’ve given up to
you.
Jun 19, 2012
Jun 19, 2012 at 8:49 PM UTC
The world is too loud for someone with fragile ears like mine.
I can hear the words you don’t mean to say,
the stories you don’t mean to tell,
the lies you thought you could hide,
and these things that aren’t meant to be heard
drown out the song of the universe with a dark static
that sometimes just makes me wish
that I was deaf to the world.
I’d rather give up hearing the sweet sounds
of the birds chirping in the pre-dawn hours
than have to be assaulted by things that I never wanted to hear,
and I’d rather have to read the words on the lips of people
because I’m no good at listening to what they say
and if I make a mistake while I’m guessing
then I can just blame it on my ignorance
and that’s something that seems to be okay in this world.
And even though ignorance should never be an excuse,
I’d be more than happy to have a healthy dose to myself,
because anything has to be better than making people out for who they really are.
May 19, 2012
May 19, 2012 at 1:16 PM UTC
I feel…
blah…
Like someone’s drained
the last bit of emotion from
the well in my chest and
I don’t know why,
but for some reason I’m feeling
hurt that you’re kicking me
to the sidelines,
even though…
I told you it was fine…
My chest feels tighter
than a ******* corset,
but I’m not complaining
because I’m worried that
if I do, you’ll just redirect
that anger and frustration
of yours right back at me
and it’ll only get worse
from here on out.
But am I just supposed to
go against my nature and
bottle these feelings up,
concentrating them into
the very poison falling
from my lips, until we
both drink it,
or maybe I just drink it,
and fall apart even more
than I already have…
Blue lips,
pale skin,
and a hand me down noose,
whose lips poisoned whose,
or are we just drowning in the doubts?
Your lips,
your skin,
and a persistent lack of faith,
my lips poisoned yours,
and I think it’s time to escape…
May 18, 2012
May 18, 2012 at 1:10 AM UTC
**** you.
You’re gorgeous.
Look.
Someone’s definition
of beauty is never based
on their own self-image.
If it was,
we’d all be spending our
entire lives staring at ourselves
in mirrors thinking,
“God **** I’m a hot mother ******
But instead,
we find our definition
of beauty written at the
corners of the world and
on the hearts of the people
around us.
And I’ve found my definition
of beauty written
in your smile,
in the way you breathe,
in your eyes,
on your lips,
and in each
and every
“I love you”
that we share.
May 15, 2012
May 15, 2012 at 8:23 PM UTC
You’re not exactly what I’d call a friend
and I didn’t mean to invite you in again,
but you’ve been around for so long
that I’ve just come to accept your presence.
Now, somehow you forced your way in
and my chest is tearing itself in two
and all of these idiotic memories are
drilling themselves to the front of my thoughts.
And I don’t know why you think
that you can just barge right in unannounced,
but take this as a formal invitation
to kindly get the hell out of my life.
May 9, 2012
May 9, 2012 at 12:57 AM UTC
I’m tracing my
insufficiencies on
the backs of my
eyelids again and
I’m trying to stop,
but for some sick
reason, the only
thoughts that
replace the ones
that I’m bound by
are equally, or so
much more
disturbing.
May 9, 2012
May 9, 2012 at 12:47 AM UTC
There are moments
when I completely lose myself
to the sluice of terrible things
that are happening in this world.
These violent images
and thoughts
infect my mind like a parasite
-blinding me to reality;
but then I remember you
and all of the love and kindness you have shown me
and it makes this world just a little bit easier to weather.
May 8, 2012
May 8, 2012 at 11:01 PM UTC
Love is a blazing star forced into a tiny, red-hot, searing iron,
and if you press too hard while you're trying to iron out the wrinkles,
you might end up burning your hands and drop the iron
along with the heart of the man you were supposed to be keeping safe.
And if you go ahead and mix up a drink to cut out the tension and pain,
be careful that you don't stir up an emotional cocktail from the bottom of his soul,
because there will be pain there that hasn't quite settled and let's face it,
navigating a sea of love is hard enough even when the waters are crystal clear
but if you cloud up the water with curious intentions, it just makes it that much harder to see
past all of the stains left on your chest and the loose threads in your voice.
And on any give Monday you could see the world in his eyes,
but today all I could see were two confused storms trying to weather
the question of whether these things were dear memories shared with passion….
May 7, 2012
May 7, 2012 at 12:49 PM UTC