I want you to l e a v e
But need you to s t a y.
You make me so god damn a n g r y sometimes.
I just want for us to be h a p p y again.
I guess I don't know if we c a n.
****
I c a n' t do this anymore.
I l o v e you, baby,
But I h a t e myself when I'm with you.
This isn't w o r k i n g.
I think we're b r o k e n beyond repair.
Jun 8, 2015
Jun 8, 2015 at 7:37 PM UTC
Honestly,
Slashing my wrists
Would be more fun than this.
Jun 4, 2015
Jun 4, 2015 at 9:42 PM UTC
you looked at me and i forgot how to
breathe me in like you're suffocating and i am made of
air just doesn't seem necessary without
you were the best thing that ever happened to
me without you is completely
meaningless was my life before you walked
in came the love and with it came
pain is inevitable but i thought we were
too much pain, too much fighting, too much
stress does not a healthy relationship
make me remember why i fell in
love me like there's no
tomorrow i'm afraid i'll wake up and you won't be
there is never a right time to say
goodbyes are hard and i refuse to let you
leave now and i swear you will never see me
again.
i love you but i swear to god you will never see me
again i let you in my
doors never stay shut for
long periods without you make my skin
crawl away but you'll always come back to
me without you is completely
meaningless is this stop-and-go cycle of back and
fourth time's the charm, right?
wrong.
i need you but i know you're bad for
me without you is becoming a
possibilities are endless and i think i will be
okay is nice but passion is
better without you and better for
it will be okay, i
promise me forever and proceed to walk
away with with you, away with the
memories hurt me more than you ever
did you really love me or was it just a
games are fun but i need something
serious relationships are hard and neither of us are to
blame me and i'll blame
you will always be the one who got
away with you, away with
missing you hurts me more than you ever did.
so. much.
goodbyes are hard but i'm forcing you to
leave now and maybe it will hurt
less is more when it comes to you and
me without you is exactly what we
need.
Jun 2, 2015
Jun 2, 2015 at 1:12 PM UTC
They say we leave fingerprints on the lives we touch.
I have been scrubbing at my skin for the past
eight months
trying to erase yours,
but now matter how hard I scrub,
I can still feel you as if
you were still here.
May 19, 2015
May 19, 2015 at 3:06 PM UTC
You told me once that you worried more
about other people than yourself.
You worried so much it made you sick.
It kept you up at night
wondering, but mostly hoping, that those you loved
would be okay.
It took me a while to understand this, but now,
now I think I do.
You loved people with everything you had,
and that is harder for me than it ever was for you.
But I found someone that I worry about
more than I worry about myself.
And, god, it makes me sick.
It keeps me up at night
wondering, but mostly hoping,
that he will be okay.
I just really need him to be okay.
May 11, 2015
May 11, 2015 at 5:59 PM UTC
You're a solid nine.
But seven ate nine.
I guess that makes you a ten, then.
Apr 20, 2015
Apr 20, 2015 at 11:43 AM UTC
You envelope me in your big, strong arms,
Coax me into staying in bed just one more day.
"You don't need to go to class," you tell me. So I don't.
I know that I should go,
That I should want to go,
But your grip is so tight that I can barely breathe.
You are the dominant one in this relationship.
I think I tried to fight it at first,
But this has been going on for so long that
Somewhere along the way I stopped trying.
I stopped fighting
And let you take me over.
Sometimes I don't know where you end and where I begin.
You and I are so intertwined.
I would love to experience life without you,
But I don't think I would know how to.
Unlike everyone else who has come and gone like the tide,
You've stuck around.
You're the only constant I've ever known.
I guess I should thank you for that.
Mar 5, 2015
Mar 5, 2015 at 5:30 PM UTC
I love you when I'm high.
Sober me isn't a fan.
Then again, I don't really like anything when I'm sober.
Don't take it personally.
Feb 21, 2015
Feb 21, 2015 at 2:33 PM UTC
Sometimes your arms feel like home,
They hold me tight, your hands
Stroking the back of my head,
Reassuring me that, yes,
I am okay and, yes,
Everything will be okay
Because you are here,
So there's nothing to fear,
And I couldn't possibly feel safer.
But sometimes your arms feel like a cage.
There's just enough air for me to breathe,
But I am trapped in your fierce, unwanted grip.
I'm sorry that I don't feel like sharing a bed
After I told you I was depressed and you
Told me to stop freaking out and calling you.
I'm sorry that your words hit me like a tidal wave
And brought me to the bathroom
With a knife in my hand.
I'm sorry that one, two, three, four cuts later,
I was bleeding out on the floor,
Practically unconscious, but awake enough
To see the growing pool of red.
You're sorry I resorted to harming myself.
I'm sorry that I didn't finish the job.
I grew up thinking that love, only love,
Could save me from myself, but maybe I was wrong.
Maybe love is the thing I need to be saved from.
Maybe love is the real monster here.
Every story has a villain.
I just never imagined that you'd be mine.
Feb 20, 2015
Feb 20, 2015 at 10:42 AM UTC
Her skin was cold as ice
And pale as winter snow.
She tried to make it right,
But it was time to go.
How do you say goodbye
To everything you know?
She really did try,
But it was time to go.
Don't waste your prayers on the dead.
The living need them more.
Close your eyes and bow your head.
She spreads her wings and soars.
Like an angel she flew,
Said farewell to the world below.
Left everyone that she knew
Because it was time to go.
Feb 18, 2015
Feb 18, 2015 at 1:46 PM UTC