charmingquin - Hello Poetry

Do you ever re –read your chats with someone just to try and re - live the joy that person brought to you That feeling, The wide smiles, the flow of waves from your spine to your belly, those butterflies, You bite your lips giggling The blushes in between Those sweet tear drops, the emotions flaring How your heart races when you get to a particular word Then you start stitching those words into thoughts and dwelling in The sudden wish to be with him The way he looks at you The thought of his lips touching yours How happy it made you feel You shut your eyes engrossed in passion There, Then, you realize You feel it in your heart He is the One…. You snap out, memories come flooding in Flashes of moments spent together, The good, the bad, the not so pleasant. Your mind gets thrown into a disarray Could this be mixed feelings or a mind trick, probably silly battles between thoughts and emotions, Or a quest to find your truth You close out every other thing You beam your focus on that lingering thought He is the one, He is the one, The one

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Dec 23, 2018

Dec 23, 2018 at 10:06 AM UTC

The One

Do you ever re –read your chats with someone just to try and re - live the joy that person brought to you That feeling, The wide smiles, the flow of waves from your spine to your belly, those butterflies, You bite your lips giggling The blushes in between Those sweet tear drops, the emotions flaring How your heart races when you get to a particular word Then you start stitching those words into thoughts and dwelling in The sudden wish to be with him The way he looks at you The thought of his lips touching yours How happy it made you feel You shut your eyes engrossed in passion There, Then, you realize You feel it in your heart He is the One…. You snap out, memories come flooding in Flashes of moments spent together, The good, the bad, the not so pleasant. Your mind gets thrown into a disarray Could this be mixed feelings or a mind trick, probably silly battles between thoughts and emotions, Or a quest to find your truth You close out every other thing You beam your focus on that lingering thought He is the one, He is the one, The one

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Often I wonder which is harder 'Singleness or Marriage' How do we do it? The struggles of being with someone and remain purified sexually The focus we must attain in this manner The mindset of suppressing lust and passion Remaining without touch till the set time Our partners how they seemingly accept the challenge but later deviate; With talks like ‘am only human’. How we look innocent but crave deep down for a tiny piece The chain of celibacy a slavery we were made to follow Or else anguish and chastising Am broken and torn The lessons I learnt I hold dearly Corinthians stated worries Oh my fate! When whilst thou end, this status I cross around my neck Wait! but don’t look waiting The side talks and jest, the respect long lost Yours will be the latest I know Happen already! Wait on God permanent anthems now Smile and wave don’t show it Or you are jealous. Be happy and suppress Be hopeful and pray For how long! Be patient, kind, God’s time is the best Oh when! It’s been 3 decades and counting No judging authority I only want to be loved Now I live for myself alone no deviation from love and service I will do not just right but the right way With God before me.

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Dec 14, 2018

Dec 14, 2018 at 6:47 AM UTC

HOW LONG

Often I wonder which is harder 'Singleness or Marriage' How do we do it? The struggles of being with someone and remain purified sexually The focus we must attain in this manner The mindset of suppressing lust and passion Remaining without touch till the set time Our partners how they seemingly accept the challenge but later deviate; With talks like ‘am only human’. How we look innocent but crave deep down for a tiny piece The chain of celibacy a slavery we were made to follow Or else anguish and chastising Am broken and torn The lessons I learnt I hold dearly Corinthians stated worries Oh my fate! When whilst thou end, this status I cross around my neck Wait! but don’t look waiting The side talks and jest, the respect long lost Yours will be the latest I know Happen already! Wait on God permanent anthems now Smile and wave don’t show it Or you are jealous. Be happy and suppress Be hopeful and pray For how long! Be patient, kind, God’s time is the best Oh when! It’s been 3 decades and counting No judging authority I only want to be loved Now I live for myself alone no deviation from love and service I will do not just right but the right way With God before me.

36

Love Huh, How do one get over this trick? That has deluded me for ages The meaning I misinterpreted for decades Lies……… All lies!! Scammed of my innocence And didn’t even realize, Broken, pitiful, self-depreciating Still, I cared less Longed for that affection I knew I would never get You’re clingy, I was told Like a fiend I craved, hungered Worse from addiction Truly, I was blind From the signs that carelessly lingered From the sovereignty I lived with for years Oh 'Empty smiles' I could wear them so well Hoping it gets better, it never did One language ''Hurt'' More Hurt, It really did hurt I swear The Tears, PAIN Memories, They just keep coming Blackmailed my emotions Tormented my conscience. The blankness, abandonment, Stillness Blossoming pain with every beat I lost my self I lost me, But held on hoping for more No! Begging for more A tiny bit…… yea Praying it gets better Then I fell hard in cupid An abuser I choose It’s all a secret, such a fool No one would ever know. Dire for help but would not accept any, I need time I say, for what exactly? Love is blind I guess, It will turn out well I hoped It’s all good Through it all I got a gift The best of its kind In the 'New' I find solace, Experience laughter, peace Though the word 'love' still eludes me, Still I stand holding on, Expecting a contrary force To whisper in my ears as I behold it "It's no trick, it’s no lie, it's no mirage, and it's right here... Looking straight into my eyes" Finally, I overcame Wait! did I?

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Oct 25, 2018

Oct 25, 2018 at 6:34 AM UTC

'' Heal Me ''

Love Huh, How do one get over this trick? That has deluded me for ages The meaning I misinterpreted for decades Lies……… All lies!! Scammed of my innocence And didn’t even realize, Broken, pitiful, self-depreciating Still, I cared less Longed for that affection I knew I would never get You’re clingy, I was told Like a fiend I craved, hungered Worse from addiction Truly, I was blind From the signs that carelessly lingered From the sovereignty I lived with for years Oh 'Empty smiles' I could wear them so well Hoping it gets better, it never did One language ''Hurt'' More Hurt, It really did hurt I swear The Tears, PAIN Memories, They just keep coming Blackmailed my emotions Tormented my conscience. The blankness, abandonment, Stillness Blossoming pain with every beat I lost my self I lost me, But held on hoping for more No! Begging for more A tiny bit…… yea Praying it gets better Then I fell hard in cupid An abuser I choose It’s all a secret, such a fool No one would ever know. Dire for help but would not accept any, I need time I say, for what exactly? Love is blind I guess, It will turn out well I hoped It’s all good Through it all I got a gift The best of its kind In the 'New' I find solace, Experience laughter, peace Though the word 'love' still eludes me, Still I stand holding on, Expecting a contrary force To whisper in my ears as I behold it "It's no trick, it’s no lie, it's no mirage, and it's right here... Looking straight into my eyes" Finally, I overcame Wait! did I?

61

Am not lost or so I claim Unremitting thoughts cloud me Deep in an ocean of worry and guilt Gradually becoming anxiety I still claim not to have A burden relinquished On me from every corner Now I pray for a heart calm as the waves Oh! Dear When will that be? I can only hope

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Oct 16, 2018

Oct 16, 2018 at 10:50 AM UTC

Soliloqiuy

Am not lost or so I claim Unremitting thoughts cloud me Deep in an ocean of worry and guilt Gradually becoming anxiety I still claim not to have A burden relinquished On me from every corner Now I pray for a heart calm as the waves Oh! Dear When will that be? I can only hope

11

Grow up girl u’ve got responsibilities These are now anthems I hear often But how? Am still a kid, so innocent and pure How do I cope with this new forcefully imposed me I don’t want to be accountable for anyone I don’t know how I want the old days back The nurturing I disregarded and saw as pestering I want it I want it back I want it now You can’t be asleep now it’s a school night Help them get ready I don’t want to hold the key Neither do I want to choose or make suggestions As they would want me to I take all the ache Bottle up the anger and be good Or at least seem to Laugh and be the big sister They all look forward to But why? I just want to be a kid again I never got to blossom or be a teen I became stuck as an adult at a premature age an instant mom Advisably This is my fate I dammed all and accepted it But what choice do I have I hope I do it right.

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Oct 16, 2018

Oct 16, 2018 at 8:19 AM UTC

stolen childhood

Grow up girl u’ve got responsibilities These are now anthems I hear often But how? Am still a kid, so innocent and pure How do I cope with this new forcefully imposed me I don’t want to be accountable for anyone I don’t know how I want the old days back The nurturing I disregarded and saw as pestering I want it I want it back I want it now You can’t be asleep now it’s a school night Help them get ready I don’t want to hold the key Neither do I want to choose or make suggestions As they would want me to I take all the ache Bottle up the anger and be good Or at least seem to Laugh and be the big sister They all look forward to But why? I just want to be a kid again I never got to blossom or be a teen I became stuck as an adult at a premature age an instant mom Advisably This is my fate I dammed all and accepted it But what choice do I have I hope I do it right.

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