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cattatonicat
22/F/Chicago Instagram: instagram.com/cattatonicat/
You wanted me to be tiny like you The compliments you gave out in the beginning Dried up and soon nothing I did was enough for you I went out of my way to help you the first time After that, you took my help for granted, made me do it over and over again You acted helpless to guilt me, and the truth is you didn’t want to help yourself When I tried to stop, you left a hurtful letter, out in the open, very well visible, on the kitchen table Yes, I know you lied about the fact that you wrote the letter for your eyes only Yes, I know you wrote the letter to hurt me and manipulate me That’s when I should have left you, but I was too nice, I was too naive I did most of the cooking, and you did most of complaining about the food You started to control the way I dress, you wanted me to dress the way that was acceptable to you You also didn’t want me to be with my friends You belittled the work I did to chase my dream If I work for my dream, I would grow, and you didn’t want that You needed me to be tiny, so you could control me I couldn’t let you manipulate me into being tiny like you I have a dream I can’t possibly achieve if I’m tiny like you I can’t let that happen That’s why you are not in my life
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Jul 1, 2020
Jul 1, 2020 at 9:46 PM UTC
Tiny
Here I am, Dancing with the devils All of them, So desperate, so desperate Here I am, Dancing with the devils Letting them deceive me, Because I want to see their true faces Here I am, Dancing with the devils Looking into their eyes, into their homeless souls Here I am, Dancing with the devils Looking into their eyes, into their homeless souls They think they can make a home in Hell, None of them know Hell wasn’t built for them Hell was built for refugees of Heaven For freedom, to be away from the devils carrying out Heaven’s deeds. Here I am, Dancing with the devils To take a good look at everything Heaven doesn’t want to show
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Jul 1, 2020
Jul 1, 2020 at 9:43 PM UTC
Dancing with the Devils
Disgusting Unpleasant Rotting Selfish Materialistic Disrespectful Weak Desperate Rude Arrogant Controlling Racist Deceitful Verminous
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Jul 1, 2020
Jul 1, 2020 at 9:42 PM UTC
Disgust
Why are you teaching them We hate each other Why are you teaching them Their country doesn’t care about their health or education Why are you teaching them Their worth is judged by how much they produce Teach children to feel Teach children to love Teach children to forgive Teach children to learn Teach children that they can tell How truly alive they are By the state of their heart
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Jul 1, 2020
Jul 1, 2020 at 9:41 PM UTC
Team Them
Kissing *** left and right Feeding on the weak, feeding them sweet nothings Makes you wonder if they can mean anything truly sweet Kissing *** up and down Feeding on the weak, feeding them fake respect Makes you wonder if they can truly respect anything
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Jun 27, 2020
Jun 27, 2020 at 6:45 PM UTC
Kissing ***
Who’s our leader? The one who has the most money! Are they compassionate? I don’t know but they are rich!
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Jun 27, 2020
Jun 27, 2020 at 6:41 PM UTC
The Leader
Feeling insecure? That’s no reason to gossip about the others and be rude Feeling two-faced? That’s no reason to blame others and be rude Have no self-respect? That’s no reason to disrespect others and be rude Have crippling self-doubt? That’s no reason to doubt others and be rude Rude to yourself? That’s no reason to be rude to the others
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Jun 26, 2020
Jun 26, 2020 at 4:20 AM UTC
Rude
I’ve always wondered what your intention was You see, the intention is what makes all the difference I know now that you intended to trap me To make me behave as you wish You tried to learn about me so you could figure out how to control me Your words that gave me hope, you said them to trap me I don’t think you ever meant to stay loyal to your words How is anyone supposed to trust you when your words mean nothing You like to own things; you’ve shown me that You are so proud of all the things you own Do you understand that I am not a thing? I am a conscious person You are so used to control; it was like second nature for you to try and trap me But you see, You have no right to trap me, to control me, to have power over me You have no right, Because I am mine and mine alone Do you understand?
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Jun 26, 2020
Jun 26, 2020 at 4:19 AM UTC
I Am Mine
All I want Is for my friends and family to be safe I want to protect them From all the sorrows they feel A lot of what I’ve felt from this world Is rotten The rot spreads, to anything that is nearby All I want Is for my friends and family To be away from the rot in this world All I want Is for this world to stop rotting Because my friends and family Live in this world All I want Is for this world to stop rotting All I want Is for this world to heal
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Jun 26, 2020
Jun 26, 2020 at 4:18 AM UTC
All I Want
Everybody acts like they do no harm At the sight of the truth, We say no that's not mine that's yours What a showmanship Gaslighting 101 should be a gen-ed course Professor preach to me, watch out for the ones you care for They will burn you alive They will laugh while you turn into ashes and tears All in the name of love, I'll sin like a saint and bless like a sinner Funny seeing you be upset with me For not carrying your weight anymore It was never mine to carry, and I don't mind you being upset Because you never stopped to think, oh, she's crushing under the weight, I should carry my share I'm not here for your convenience I'm here to die we all are All my best friends are losing their innocence And I miss our innocence Very much, very much so All in the name of love, I'll sin like a saint and bless like a sinner
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Jun 26, 2020
Jun 26, 2020 at 4:18 AM UTC
Sin Like a Saint and Bless Like a Sinner