I hate how you take your coffee
And leave water on the floor when you take a shower
I hate the way you tell me directions
I hate you make me feel at home
I hate the way you know me
I hate how it brings me bliss
I hate how good I sleep when we’re together
It’s even worse when you hold me
I hate that my day doesn’t start until I hear your voice
And how I’ll call just to tell my mind I tried
I hate and even hate more when you stare me
I hate you for knowing me
Through all my hate
I’ve never hated you
Not even a little
Not even a moment
Apr 23, 2024
Apr 23, 2024 at 10:48 AM UTC
Didn't know it was possible to feel like this bad
It won't always feel like this
But I don't want to not feel like this about you
I only want you
Someone said ,"The greatest love is the one that you can't live without. The one that you're prepared to die for."
It's all wrong
It's not what love it
It's more romantic to live for it
If there is a way to be together
Just tell me, now
I love you
I'm not going to stop loving you till the day I die
..I love you
We'll find each other
We'll come back
here..
I'll be drifting..
until I find you
I'll be searching for you
every moment,
every single moment
When we do find each other again
No one can tear us apart
Joined so tightly
We'll be joined so tight
Let's come back here,
every year
Midday
I'll come
I'll be here, every year
My whole life
When we've come here,
Just an hour
We'll be together
Every year
If you do meet someone.. you like
Be kind to them
Don't compare them
Mar 14, 2023
Mar 14, 2023 at 4:39 AM UTC
Be glad with goodbye
You love me
Miss me for just a short moment
Love yourself the most
You can push
I want you to be glad now
Let go of the weight
You can heal
You can finally be free
Mar 9, 2023
Mar 9, 2023 at 5:21 AM UTC
Clarity be my guide
I want to picture a world
Where a simple song can make a difference
Each day I wake, searching
I don’t want to imagine a future without you
I can’t do that
But your gone, the answer escapes me
Seems like everyone else has it figured it out
Still, tomorrow will come
Clarity be my guide
It makes me sick, why is everyone so happy?
I walk this alone
There is more to life, I need to know
Lost so far, home alone, I shut myself off
You call, your voice leads me
Clarity be my guide
Whatever comes, guide me back to light
Let the fantasy
Lift me high, and I’ll be me
Clarity be my guide
Please stay by my side
Mar 9, 2023
Mar 9, 2023 at 5:06 AM UTC
I'm sorry too,
I'm sorry I believed you could be genuine,
I'm sorry I believed your lies,
After lies,
After lies,
I'm sorry,
Feeling I thought I felt were real
All fake!
Fake because it was built upon YOUR mountain
Mountain of lies,
You said feelings towards me were real
Why?
They were built upon my mountain
Truth,
I was real.
I was genuine,
I truly cared about your feelings
Your heart,
Your soul,
Your truth
Pain,
Only thing that was real...
It's deep
Still searching,
Searching for the feeling I had for you,
Searching in a dark room,
Blind
Wandering around for that feeling
Feeling I'm searching for,
Not real,
Blank,
Feeling won't be there...
Searching for a ghost
It's done
My light?
Stop your pity
I'm alone!
Wondering,
Wandering,
Crashing,
Failing,
Why me!
Again!
Stop!
Let me drift here
Please!
It's quiet
Your story doesn't bother me,
Your past meant nothing to me,
Changed nothing
If,
If!
If this talk happened in the beginning,
I wouldn't be here
I wish..
I wish,
I wish you trust me
Here I sit,
Dark room
Oct 31, 2022
Oct 31, 2022 at 2:20 PM UTC
I don't worry about others
In always being 2nd I found true loneliness
Not being the one people come too
Being told 2nd hand information
Telling me a story after you told someone else, don't want it
Why bother?
I regret ever thinking I could leave my box
At least there I wasn't lied too
At least there I wasn't lied to about being 1st
What a mistake
Box is safe
Secure
I think about the choices I made and don't even know myself
My judgment keeps shifting from neutral to having compassion
Days I shrink down to existing
At midnight my chest is tight and hard to breathe
In the silence, I give up fighting
Oct 28, 2022
Oct 28, 2022 at 8:25 PM UTC
Am I?
Am I a good person?
I've lied
I cheated
Yet people who know me say I am?
Am I?
Only child
Single parent household
Being *****
Dated
Married
Single
All events I've learned and grown with the information I had at the time
When does being a good person come to light?
Am I a good person or am I just learning?
I am honest with myself
I am rude
I am smart on paper
I fail
I lie
I explain
What is true about me?
I dated this guy once who I felt was everything
Define everything!
Cause I am not sure
He is honest, makes me feel safe, makes me laugh, and so much more
The word everything doesn't feel like asking too much
Am I good?
I lied to him
He left,
He told me I need to find me
We talk, kinda
Not in hopes of finding me and thinking we'll be together
In hopes of understanding or experiencing finding the true me
Am I me?
Oct 28, 2022
Oct 28, 2022 at 7:55 PM UTC
To the man who brought me back,
I can't change the beginning
I was unprepared for your love
What I can change is the start and end, "if a start again"
The moment we met I felt my soul connect to yours
For years before I met you, I was living in a glass box
Hanging out with my demons
Guilt of cheating
Fear of relationships not working due to never learning to be open
Regret,
Not being able to carry
Excluded
Anger!
Being ***** and told, "You lead me on."
You tapped on my glass and brought me out
It was too late
Fear won
I didn't open and you found out
Regret holds the crown now
Looking to my heart for an answer. It gave me a vague answer, "Whether you're lovers, best friends, soulmates, or something else. Words can't help you here."
With cariño (love) is your gift to me
For everything you gave me I love you and thank you
I'm sorry
Oct 14, 2022
Oct 14, 2022 at 11:33 PM UTC
People say you only live once, but people are as wrong about that as they are about everything. Life can continue after a lifetime of empty happiness. In the darkest moments before dawn a woman returns to her bed. What life is she leading? Is it the same life she was living an hour ago, a day ago, a year ago? As she lays down in bed she doesn’t even recognize him. Who is this man? Are they leading separate lives or a single life shared? Or are they only aware of the power they generate between themselves?
A small storm is approaching the horizon. As the woman is staring at the ceiling unable to fall asleep. She begins to remember the countless memories made between her and the man she once knew. How their lives were once together being far forgotten. Drips of water start pouring down from the sky. Thunder and lightning darken the sky even more. This is her chance, her moment, the woman dresses and goes outside.
I love you, I hope you still know that. I can’t sleep without you. Even when we lay together I know I am hurting you. Where is she going this early? I follow her to the backyard where I can see the love of my life dancing beneath the rain, jumping over a pond and underneath the stars. The more I watch her I can tell she is waiting for the full moon. This kind of freedom she is feeling is what I feel in love with so many years ago. What have I done to her spirit?
In the mist of all the dancing the woman is still not contempt of her accomplishment. She was hoping to find her smile and laughter, just as hope was lost. As the woman stops to let the rain overcome her she sees the man approaching her. With his touch on her face it washes out her broken heart. He never thought the day would come where he would bet his entire life on loving her and speak her name with such passion.
Considering her look he can see he is wasting his time, chance is gone. Now he truly sees through her eyes that he is suffering. He wishes to return to being her partner, but it’s too late. Before he leaves her alone and vanishes. He wants to cry to show her one last time how much she means to him. To kiss her one last time before forgetting her in his dreams. Just one last touch before closing the last chapter of the book. He wants to tell her that this is not how the ending should be. Never thought he would lose her. He always thought for sure that he would have had her, and her heart. Unfortunately, this is how it ends.
If you love someone you open yourself up to suffering, sad truth. Maybe they break your heart, maybe you break theirs. Without it you’ll never be able to look at yourself the same way.
Dec 7, 2017
Dec 7, 2017 at 2:32 PM UTC
Let me breathe you in
Your smell sends make me light headed
Its like smoke filling my lungs
Allowing your soul join mine
How long can I breathe this in before I pass out
Being joined your warmth in my own
Not even two feet away from your body Im cold
Let me share this with you
The way I feel with you is too cheesy for mind
It makes me smile when I kiss you
My burning desire that I push away to regain control
That small amount of space I cant live with, I grab you back
Those rare awful moments I think I have control of my body
You push me back in your arms and there we are
Consumed in this fetish for your body near me
Your lips pressed against mine no longer needing my mind
Let me push you
Jul 18, 2017
Jul 18, 2017 at 3:06 AM UTC