Maybe it’s the familiarity of what I once
enjoyed or maybe it’s the alcohol
acting as the conduit for this electrifying
relapse down memory lane since one wrong turn had
me at the door step of an addiction that
I long forgot about but I think somehow it’s different
this time, maybe my tolerance level has gone up,
since the buzz
just isn’t as strong
as it used to be.
Nov 2, 2014
Nov 2, 2014 at 12:04 PM UTC
Pour your pain into my mug.
Let it steep until it’s as bitter
as the red wine sipped by new lovers
or the coffee drank by the lonely man.
Let it steep until it’s too strong to taste.
Then let me sip it slowly
while my lips curl away in disgust.
Still, I’ll force it down ignoring
how tepid and foul
the taste of your pain coating
my throat might be.
I’ll breathe in the toxins,
allowing them to fill my insides with the wafting
vile stench of your struggles
until my head spins and my vision blurs.
Let me free you from your sorrow;
until it corrupts my heart,
intrudes my impenetrable armour,
eats me alive,
and rots me from the inside out.
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 9:35 PM UTC
You left and my bones turned to stardust
my heart to stone
collapsed on the bathroom floor
a pile of blood
your name the only thing
I spit from my lips
before I blacked out.
I called you
choking through blackened lungs
but you laughed and left me here
spit your poison in my wound
I awoke the next morning
with residue from the eight shots
of whiskey I chased down
in an effort to drown
the memories from the inside out
because your ******* face was still etched into
my ceiling from the night before.
Sep 21, 2014
Sep 21, 2014 at 2:47 AM UTC
Vision blurred by blinding rays
of amber coloured morning light
bouncing through the cotton curtain
climbing its way around the
valleys and hills of the body laying motionless
sleeping in its alcohol-induced slumber
contrary to the dust dancing merrily in the
golden yellow hues of the morning air
reinforcing the understanding of why
Van Gogh thought yellow
was the happiest colour.
Sep 14, 2014
Sep 14, 2014 at 10:30 PM UTC
It was late, of course, and the glow of the light
illuminated the dark shadows in the corner of my room.
Sitting with our limbs entwined
sipping on our second glass of wine,
we were discussing in our usual tired eye manner.
I watched as you pensively considered reincarnation.
“Maybe a blue jay or a lazy panda”, you said laughing
“or rather a busy otter or a black lab”.
I got quiet as I contemplated this idea.
Not sure whether I’d want to come back as an animal
or even another living thing.
While you raised your glass to your lips
I raised the question to myself and began to wonder
what it would be like to return as one of your ribs.
To be with you all the time,
perched quietly beneath the soft weight of your breast,
riding along under the soft fabric of your flannel shirts.
Maybe I’d return as your favourite rib,
if you even bothered to count,
which is what I did when you fell asleep that night.
The bare of your chest rising and falling,
gently firming and unfirming the shape of your cage,
hearing the slow of your breath as you relaxed.
My legs grazed the length of yours,
my fingers doing that crazy numbering thing
choosing which ribs I would like to perch
my reincarnated self between.
Aug 17, 2014
Aug 17, 2014 at 10:43 PM UTC
I wrapped my lips around the words
felt by my skeleton as it
washed up against the shore of this silver tongue;
drifting,
laying still on the bank of a river,
cracking open,
water swallowing it in shame.
It wasn’t supposed to go this far.
I watched your fingers list its way
around the empty neck of a brown bottle,
the fragility reminding us both
amount the damage of throwing stones
at houses made of glass.
I avoided your eyes
as I lifted my own bottle to my lips,
quenching the thirst of the calling demons
that scratched and clawed
the lining of my being.
Couldn’t let you witness
the poison as it forces it’s way out.
No matter how badly I needed to feel anchored,
I was better off, left to drown,
than to pull you under
the waves birthed by my lack of transparency.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
I couldn’t look at you straight;
my eyes covered by the blurred goggles
of the alcohol consumed
seeing you only
through the gleaming vessels
wrenched in your palm.
This shouldn’t be happening.
I ordered another round,
unable to stand the spectrum cast
or the colours of truth
behind the conversations
The amber tint of the bottle
reflecting nothing, standing
as volatile and opaque as
the soul clinging to it.
I finished my beer,
let the backwash cast back,
from every thoughtless, selfish draft,
and forced it back.
“I have to go, I’m sorry.”
I left my money on the bar,
hoping it was enough to pay
our demons for the night.
Aug 17, 2014
Aug 17, 2014 at 10:31 PM UTC
Hastening in the sunset like foolish children
we watched as the yellow sphere tucked itself into the lake.
As night time fell,
I fell harder.
He had me in a trance
using his voice to pull me,
lure me,
he whispers
“the road is too long,
but the sky is calling”
Up
Up
Up
We flew while they slept
running lengths of the milky way
and doing loops around Saturn’s rings
only stopping once to visit the boy on the moon
not yet a man,
but in his innocence, he promised to light our travels
with the subtle glow of the moon.
He lead me all over the city
weaving us through tall buildings and low tunnels
forgetting the path well trodden
and forging our own way,
escaping reality and everyday monotony
forcing the dull, normal, tasteless days to separate
into 24 hour periods of potential for excitement.
We ran this one light town with our bodies floating through
the cement trees and brick mountains,
not letting fear cast a single shadow and
letting freedom take us to places unknown.
But as time kept slipping from our fingertips,
the last grain of sand began to fall;
he hurried to get me home.
We returned to make a blanket fort
and filled it with our memories of that night.
I settled into my cozy nest of pillows
and we stared out at the world we had just left.
I cuddled into his chest as he held me tight.
“Don’t let me go,
even while my feet are on the ground.”
As sleep took over my body,
I felt my night guide sneak back into the sky.
I didn’t stir when I saw his shadow leap from the window
in the soft light of the moon,
for I knew he would be back again,
when the great yellow sphere slipped back into the lake.
Aug 3, 2014
Aug 3, 2014 at 11:13 AM UTC
Streams run in rivulets
into the moist crevices
of her blemished skin
trickleling through the
curvasious channels
down her naked sides
while tiny droplets
of clarity continue to flow
through the valleys as she
sit quietly under the heavy
rain from silver springs
cleansing her past anxieties
drenching her in bliss
Jul 27, 2014
Jul 27, 2014 at 11:44 PM UTC
I wish I had a poetic way to describe the ache in my chest when I remember what it's like to have your lips on mine
or how it felt to intertwine our fingers
or maybe how my soul craved the sound of your drunken voice after a long night
maybe I can find a way to explain the feeling of the tattoos on your arms when you held me
or the curve in your side when you pinned me to the side of the van that one night
but I really don't have a clue where to start.
Jul 26, 2014
Jul 26, 2014 at 11:54 PM UTC
When I took my first hit of you
I never knew it’d be like this
that giddy head buzz
while it kills me from the inside
not around and I feel deprived
you’re killing me slowly
but I’ll disregard this
because I need a vice right now
so you can be the cancer in my lungs
the reason I can’t breathe
you’ll be in everything that hurts
pulling me down into an ocean of smoke
my blackened lungs will fill with you
but metaphorically I’ve already drowned
Jul 23, 2014
Jul 23, 2014 at 11:51 PM UTC