the tip of a perfectly rounded felt pen
pressing with both purpose yet restraint,
the ink taking to the paper as if magnetic,
then spreading slow and sure
that is how it was,
perhaps still is,
between you and I
as I try to think of an answer;
a way to figure it all out
and leave it
in a nice tidy heap
behind us
those around me seem have to stumbled
purposely or not,
onto the answer
maybe they just put themselves out there
and do the only thing there really is left to do:
Carry on
sooner or later
the past loses it's luster and appeal
like last years pair of Louboutin's
out with old, in with the new
but no matter how far into the future
my heart continues to carry on
no matter how much luster and appeal
fades away from the shiny patina
of my idealized love
still,
you mar me
like a water colored stain of faded ink,
bled soft and permanent
Nov 13, 2013
Nov 13, 2013 at 9:13 AM UTC
the new cat litter box
sits alone
in the corner by the door
where you last left
for good
with your shoes
and your cat
and some potatoes
I cooked for you
I am too neurotic
you said
thoughtless and rude
the perpetual thinker of the
unimportant
obsessing over how big a one cm
canker sore is and is it maybe cancer instead
and it's true
I worry constantly
for the past ten years
while we played out this game
of cat and mouse
I worried I'd never see you again
never have you here
never feed you
never laugh with you
never hear you tell me
don't worry honey
my little worry wart
you are okay
don't worry so much
I'm here...
but the truth is
you are not
you were more annoyed
than amused
more angered than empathetic
more certain than not
so you took the cat
and my dreams
and you left
at some point
I'll clean out the litter box
and crawl under my bed
to find the little stuffed white
mouse
I bought for Billie Holiday
and I'll put it away
save it somewhere
to find in a year or two
on some quiet gray Sunday
afternoon
and maybe for that moment
forget to worry about anything
at all
Mar 6, 2013
Mar 6, 2013 at 9:06 AM UTC
in the quiet
I’ll remember
a hundred lifetimes
with you
fallen cherry blossoms
and my breath
stolen like summer
the forever bereft
fantasy
forged and fraught
beneath fingertips
of ecstacy;
lips
of sorrow
the truth of hearts
running nowhere
but here
the shadow
of your voice
slipping like rain
the sound
of your feet
in the wet distance
and something of
your ample body
and wide embrace
lingering like a nebulous
of violent/violet dream
across the broken/blue
horizon of my soul
Jan 11, 2013
Jan 11, 2013 at 10:47 AM UTC
to set the world right again
would take your eyes
round and black
as a child's
and your hand
smooth as polished
stone
and soft as cake flour
the wind came up
I wasn't looking
it's been a decade almost
the world and my heart
askew
one consonant,
two vowels
to right it all,
you
Nov 30, 2012
Nov 30, 2012 at 8:03 AM UTC
the day ends
again...
evening blurs
the edges of my sight;
dark violet drifts
of ecstasy
confiscate my mind
I am here still
without reason
amongst the ruins
of "what if's"and
'what might have been's"
of a soon
griefless history
it is quiet here
so quiet
where truth speaks
in wordless, depthless
shadows
of recognition
haunting my soul
deeper than
I can remember or forget
I know now
you were never
here at all
and oh the madness,
the bitter sadness
I taste still
between these sheets
and oh,
the forever violence
of this silence
in my heart
Jun 30, 2012
Jun 30, 2012 at 4:14 PM UTC
white edges of truths
dance and lose themselves
against the blue drape of sky
I swam off the tips
of your fingers
and found the bottom
of
everything
....surfacing in the dead
of winter
or even under a hot dry
summer sun
I shiver
I expect and decide
nothing
while
the day aches inside a
a cocoon of reality
waiting for my heart
to butterfly
again
I find there is only today
and your face gone
like cherry blossoms
and yesterdays rain
the night
longing under a moon
that will leave it
a million times
more
remembering
my trail of a thousand
kisses showering
your ignorant cheek
in the ochre light
of morning
falling away
like a dream
Jun 30, 2012
Jun 30, 2012 at 4:11 PM UTC
there would be somewhere
I found
a voice, a hand,
a heart
but not just any
these days are useless
now
at least to me
you,
you fly on
gathering speed,
a sail in the wind
I watch
from a soft sad sky
longing,
those forever years...
that never happened
the days
when sun spoke stronger
than anyone;
the light glittering in
your eyes
your hands,
my world
something simple then
lost
in this tangled web
we weave
under a sky of dreams
Jun 30, 2012
Jun 30, 2012 at 4:05 PM UTC
you have left me to
wonder
year after year
as cherry blossoms
bloom and fall
along the side of the road
did we ever want to be more
than the cherry blossoms
you and i ~
beautiful and lost
Jun 30, 2012
Jun 30, 2012 at 9:25 AM UTC