When I die
I want to be able to be there
To laugh at the ******** act of everyone
Acting like they gave a ****
Saying that they always loved me
Never once even showing it
I want to see the sad look on their faces
When they see the dead look in mine
Acting like they knew me
There are farms with less **** in them
Who am I kidding
No one will show
And that's how I expect it to be
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 7:38 AM UTC
I don't see my life going on much longer
I'll be alive but no longer with anyone
No longer will this black cloud hover over me
I take my leave
Maybe someday I'll decide to return
With a clear head
Then again
That's all just a dream
Make me disappear
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 7:30 AM UTC
Keep on being a ******* idiot
Lie to yourself
Tell yourself that you're beautiful
Tell yourself that you're smart
Tell yourself that you're happy
Anything that you think does not matter
It's what everyone else thinks that shapes you
If they call you stupid
You're stupid
If they say you're hideous
You're hideous
Your "positive attitude" won't get you anywhere
It's not magic
Keep on lying to yourself see where that gets you
Jan 26, 2018
Jan 26, 2018 at 1:16 AM UTC
No one feels like family
Not even my own kin
Not my friends
Not my coworkers
No one
Your family is supposed to be who you turn to when you need help
If you're not willing to go to them
They aren't your family
They're just people you grew up with
Who kept you alive
Feeling alone is terrible
Someone once told me I'm strong
I disagree
I'm weak
A coward
Stubborn
Arrogant
Its exhausting being at this alone
One day I just hope I run out of gas
Miles from home
Jan 26, 2018
Jan 26, 2018 at 12:25 AM UTC
There is no worse feeling
Then when you know everything is going to ****
Then someone comes along and tells you "everything's gonna be alright"
Is someone important to me dead?
No
Financial issues?
Not really
But this constant feeling of being alone
Is like a **** plague
It feeds off the rest of me trying to live
Killing me bit by bit
Taking everything I love away from me
Mentally and emotionally
Can't pick up a camera, all your pictures are ****
**** that pencil, you can't draw
***** your dreams, welcome to reality
Where everything is work work work
Until you quit quit quit
The realest thing in the world
Is you and your pathetic self
Jan 18, 2018
Jan 18, 2018 at 12:40 AM UTC
Silence
Blackness
Speechless
We all die alone
Some people will be used to it
No one to turn to for comfort
Just means less time crying about losing someone
Better that no one knows you to soare them heartache
I prefer it this way
At least I'll be the only one present
The only person who ever gave a ****
Don't let them fool you
They only care about themselves
Dec 4, 2017
Dec 4, 2017 at 7:55 PM UTC
I can't go on feeling alone
There are people who say they are there for me
But are they really?
They say they care but that's only a bandage
It'll fall off sooner or later
I want them away from me
I push people away
Make them hate me
So when I do pass
I'll finally make them happy
Good riddance
Nov 19, 2017
Nov 19, 2017 at 11:42 AM UTC
There I am
Standing in front of a busted mirror
Laughing at myself
Because I've come to realize
I'm nothing
And will be remembered as nothing
I want to leave this world
On my own accord
No one will love me
Miss me
They will just be disappointed in me
For the last time
I have no legacy
The words from this
Will be lost in time
No one to pass my stories
Like anyone wants to hear them Anyways
There is no one there for me
I have looked
And looked and looked and looked
Never have I found someone
There is only myself
Myself, a poor excuse of a life
Oct 27, 2017
Oct 27, 2017 at 10:33 AM UTC
I don't believe in anything
There is no happiness without money
No love
No higher power to turn to
No reasons to stay alive and wait for the better
There is nothing
Why must I work hard for others and be selfless?
To die tired?
Life is a never ending cycle of nothing that matters
So I sit here and try to think about the good
It all rots away
The bad stays
It always will
The world is a ****** place for those with hope
Let nothing fill up the dreams
That way when you realize you're nothing
You won't be so disappointed
Oct 15, 2017
Oct 15, 2017 at 4:00 AM UTC
I'm so ashamed of myself
I do not deserve my last name
I am not worthy enough to
Continue my life
Everything within my arms reach Might as well be destroyed
I deserve only
My loneliness to keep me whole
My reflection to befriend me
My cries to sing me to sleep
Take my ability to walk
Someone else can make better use of it
Take my sight
I only see darkness anyways
Take my hearing
I don't deserve beautiful sounds
I'm lost
Why can't I find my way?
Everything is cluttered
I stumble and fall with every step
That's the only thing I'm good at
I miss who I used to be
Aug 22, 2017
Aug 22, 2017 at 1:09 AM UTC