I knew life was more than my love for you.
I just got lost in the idea that I'd suffocate without you by my side.
But I knew that with time and space, the sun would come out
and I’d remember how to breathe again.
But I guess, I never anticipated this bittersweet feeling
that arises when my mind wonders back to you.
You’re getting married this weekend,
which I’ll admit still surprises me after everything.
But I’m not shocked, nor am I angry anymore.
I’m not as broken as I thought I was.
And through this time, I learned that you didn’t break me.
But rather that, I broke myself trying fix you.
This was unfair to me, but it was also unjust to you.
Fragments of my soul were never meant
to substitute your missing pieces.
So, although there are lot of things between us,
that I guess always will be there,
I want you to know that I’m sorry, and that
I truly want you to be happy.
I’m not done growing from this and I won’t be for a long time
But I’m done letting this define me.
Because life is more than my love for you
Oct 16, 2018
Oct 16, 2018 at 12:28 AM UTC
When you told me you didn’t love me anymore,
I still had your bites of passions on my chest.
The imprints of your fingers grasp were still on my thighs.
And warmth of your soul was still embracing my heart.
It’s funny how with few words,
your marks of lust can turn to bruises of disgust.
The body that once had signs of our connection,
now shows spots of my shame.
Jun 11, 2018
Jun 11, 2018 at 12:00 AM UTC
How many times can you rip my heart out before I can die?
Why do you insist on finding out?
Jun 5, 2018
Jun 5, 2018 at 6:48 PM UTC
I hate the way you've made me think about myself.
I'm disgusted with my own dependence on you.
I resent that I feel like I can't breathe without you.
You've destroyed what I believed love is supposed to mean.
You're soiled my dreams of falling for my best friend.
You continuously shred my heart with your whiplash tenderness.
I'm confused by you.
Is your attention lust or infatuation?
You and I can't seem to be apart.
No matter how many times I tell you it hurts to be together.
You've made me ashamed to show my face around.
Your touch has turned my skin ***** it can't be physically cleaned.
When your name appears on my phone, I feel like throwing it and running the other way.
I wish I could take everything back.
Every stolen moment together, every private joke, every discrete dinner.
I want you to know that I want this to be over.
Apr 23, 2018
Apr 23, 2018 at 10:39 PM UTC
You didn't believe that I could move mountains the way she could.
How could you think that,
when I have already changed my terrain to fit your boarders?
Are my winds not as strong and passionate?
Are my tides not as intense and devoted?
Why is her heat better than mine,
when you tell me we are the same temperature?
Apr 14, 2018
Apr 14, 2018 at 12:53 AM UTC
Your people can’t be trusted anymore.
They speak lies through split tongues,
Claiming they want what’s best for each of us,
While handing us matches to start the war.
Your people were never really mine,
They never gave me the allegiance they gave you.
But they faked a loyalty that was continuously shattered
until I finally said enough.
These people aren’t my people.
My people will come when the time is right.
When I take the next step and chose to walk away from my sword.
My people will take care of me and I them
My people will help me forget the pain yours have caused.
And, my people will never betray me the way you have
Apr 8, 2018
Apr 8, 2018 at 11:05 AM UTC
It's taken me 1 year, 10 months, and 20 days
to realize that you will never love me,
the way I have always loved you.
Apr 2, 2018
Apr 2, 2018 at 4:06 PM UTC
I hate my codependency.
I wish I could throw my world into the ocean.
And let the sand warm me, let my own heat warm me.
These figures of my life,
I trick my mind into thinking they are the air, the water,
The reasoning.
I wish my maturity would complete.
So I could be content with myself as the sun and the land.
I want to conquer my own terrains and build my own ships.
Not sit waiting at the dock for a crew that will never come.
Mar 22, 2018
Mar 22, 2018 at 9:53 PM UTC
You can have the town,
I’ll call the mayor and get you the deed.
You can have the have the roads,
I’ll arrange for the potholes to be filled.
You can keep the job,
I never intended to stay that long.
You can keep the friends,
I can make more.
You can keep my records,
I can find more music.
You can have my watch,
I won’t miss the time.
You can take my shoes,
To have one last stomp on my heart.
You can keep the jokes,
I don’t laugh at them anymore.
You can have my jacket,
So something can keep you warm.
You can stay with her,
I can promise, it’s no longer a concern of mine.
And in return?
You can let me go.
Mar 10, 2018
Mar 10, 2018 at 11:30 PM UTC
Stop coming into my life if you have no intention of staying.
I’ve ended us so many times,
But you push us back together.
No matter how many times I tell you,
Enough is enough.
Enough isn’t good enough for you.
Sneaking around was never part of a friendship that I wanted.
Lying about where I go, was never something I signed up for.
Being the other woman, was never in the description.
But being my friend isn’t all you want.
But yet you have no desire to be more than that.
You can’t keep coming in and rearranging my house,
Especially when I’m still putting it back after the last time you left.
I want you to visit, I’ve wished for you to stay.
But you can’t keep pushing in with no intention of paying rent.
Either sign a lease with me or keep your apartment.
Because soon, you will lose any place you ever had in mine.
Mar 1, 2018
Mar 1, 2018 at 11:46 PM UTC