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benjamin-clarke
35/M
I can see and sense my new way of being I can feel and recall the power of seeing The veil of “my thoughts” have lifted Something profound in presence shifted Seeing the world clearly isn’t what you think The taste of the drink, is just the taste of the drink There is no craving, fantasy, or filter The simplicity throws you off kilter I'll stay here for now to see what's next Presence is a moment, without context Uncertainty is now my friend not my foe I take a step forward, let's see where we go
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Mar 31, 2021
Mar 31, 2021 at 5:32 PM UTC
This is it?
Anger I hid you far away In a cave, black and grey While you were gone I lost my will and my song But I now see you belong Voices made me hide you Now I have some fresh advice Your truth is a fire, not all is nice You are fierce The guard of vulnerable and pure Without you, I refuse to endure You move worlds You scream at injustice You start revolution You bring my power back There's more, that's a fact Please do return Not to dominate or define To push me into a life I would sign The door is open Let us see, speak, and feel Possibilities are endless and real It's time to get honest Our journey won't be light More of a dance and a fight But I choose this as my right Not forgetting my heart and clear sight
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Mar 8, 2021
Mar 8, 2021 at 2:28 PM UTC
Anger, a lost friend
The time has come, let’s meet Pensively, I approach my seat Legs cross, arms down, I ground On earth, origin of life and sound Pain awaits, through a kingdom of gates Wall upon wall, separates The only way to get where I must go Is to wade and move against the waters flow I shiver, I shudder, a nasty feeling The dark road ahead has me reeling It’s asking me to slowly let go I cry out, I don’t feel ready for you to show I fluctuate, in and out, out and in The first layer of discomfort starts to dim My stomach is in knots, organs turning My heart is alight, and softly burning The energy in my being starts to drain As I experience the beginnings of my pain Years and years I’ve lived with no emotion Now I’m in a landfill of hurt with no potion The sting begins to penetrate my chest I lose my will, my speech, this is my quest I feel a clarity, cold, raw, and pure A dismissed child, I must know him to cure In hysterics, I run back to safety I can't experience your full grace lately There are too many pits to explore in one day Right now I’m opting to escape, hide, and play Until I am ready to touch this truth, so grey A pain that is near, but also so far away
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Feb 9, 2021
Feb 9, 2021 at 10:42 AM UTC
A Journey to Pain
Awake in the dark A voice reminds me Open your presence Let go of that thought Close your eyes slow You are held by me A universe you can't see
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Jan 13, 2021
Jan 13, 2021 at 5:11 PM UTC
A universe I can't see
Sometimes I feel like a kid Running, climbing, playing Smiling as I climb a new flight of stairs Looking to my parents when I reach the top Waiting for eye contact, a clap, A shimmer of pride in their eye But i'm an adult I'm trying, helping, managing Working to make some kind of mark on the world As different as these worlds may seem Both seek a pure thing We are looking for the world to smile back at us To say: I see you, I appreciate you, you are here.
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Jan 5, 2021
Jan 5, 2021 at 7:27 PM UTC
Climbing
I dread your arrival, it’s true You are cold, you are raw, so blue You rob me of my heart, my soul Your talk is not meant to console Less of this, more of that, lose hope No clear way to connect or cope Pause, please hold on and let me speak Like a friend who cares for you deep I’m here to connect you to pain A friend who you passed for your brain My voice is low, but is the way I beg you to hear what I say Stop trying, stop doing, let go I am your guide, let’s try this flow It’s time to feel how you feel now I am here to whisper slow down The tightness I bring to your chest A mark for you to seek what’s best I hear you but I can not wait You show up when I need to be great That magical girl, her eyes bright I want her to see my mind and my might But here you are again, so bold Your track is on repeat and old OK, OK, I’ll see us through Close your eyes and believe what’s true You want to love and care for her Like you have never practiced before You forget who you are in pursuit of this door So pause, breathe, and connect to the floor Stop shaping your words, dulling truth She wants your all, not needing proof Show her your world, not what she wants Your care, your truth, even what haunts The vision of the world you could share Your soft touch, gentle words, heart bare You are on the ledge, the risk is high But be yourself till the day you die The measure of a man is his heart It conquers fear, evil, that’s just a start You call me anxious, but I’m your friend You won’t forget this when we meet again
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Dec 18, 2020
Dec 18, 2020 at 10:44 AM UTC
Anxiety, an unlikely friend
I dread your arrival, it’s true You are cold, you are raw, so blue You rob me of my heart, my soul Your talk is not meant to console Less of this, more of that, lose hope No clear way to connect or cope Pause, please hold on and let me speak Like a friend who cares for you deep I’m here to connect you to pain A friend who you passed for your brain My voice is low, but is the way I beg you to hear what I say Stop trying, stop doing, let go I am your guide, let’s try this flow It’s time to feel how you feel now I am here to whisper slow down The tightness I bring to your chest A mark for you to seek what’s best I hear you but I can not wait You show up when I need to be great That magical girl, her eyes bright I want her to see my mind and my might But here you are again, so bold Your track is on repeat and old OK, OK, I’ll see us through Close your eyes and believe what’s true You want to love and care for her Like you have never practiced before You forget who you are in pursuit of this door So pause, breathe, and connect to the floor Stop shaping your words, dulling truth She wants your all, not needing proof Show her your world, not what she wants Your care, your truth, even what haunts The vision of the world you could share Your soft touch, gentle words, heart bare You are on the ledge, the risk is high But be yourself till the day you die The measure of a man is his heart It conquers fear, evil, that’s just a start You call me anxious, but I’m your friend You won’t forget this when we meet again
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