**thoughts in my head clouding my sight
my anxieties keeping me up at night
constantly thinking you’re not on my side
thinking that all my demons will collide
there’s something in the water i drink
i know this because i fear what i think
you tell me i’m crazy and that we’re okay
are you tired of reminding me everyday
i spin further away from my truth
i dive deeper into the pain of my youth
digging and searching for some peace
but these voices in my head don’t cease
i remember the rush the joy the ache
knowing there was something at stake
self harm my absolute longest lost friend
i hope that we never ever meet again**
Sep 15, 2020
Sep 15, 2020 at 11:09 PM UTC
*i never got to hear your heart beat
i never got to choose a name
i keep losing you before i have you
and all i feel for you is pain
i never got to hold you
or comfort you when you cried
because again i’ve lost you
and no longer have you inside
they say that healing helps you
and moving on is for the best
but how can i sleep peacefully
knowing now you’ll forever rest
i’ve cried a million tears for you
and sang a thousand songs
because in my arms my love
is right where you belong*
Feb 5, 2020
Feb 5, 2020 at 10:37 PM UTC
*it was over the fence that we met
and over the fence we kissed
till it was your lips and your face
that i constantly missed
you stole my heart away from me
you took it and you ran
far away from all the trouble
i thank you for who i am
i love you more than sunshine
i love you more than rain
through every day and every night
my love will stay the same
taking my soul on new adventures
to learn to live and to love
you are my happy ending
you were truly sent from above
my angel, my darling..
my sweet sweet boy
you bring me endless laughter
you bring me endless joy
i love you till my heart stops
i’ll love you to the end
as long as you love me also
and always be my best friend*
Jul 4, 2018
Jul 4, 2018 at 5:50 PM UTC
Tell me I mean nothing
tell me you’ve moved on.
Tell me that it’s over
just tell me that you’re gone.
Promise me you hate me
promise me you do.
I promised you forever
I promised I loved you.
Now everything is ruined
now things have gone amiss.
Now I need you more than ever
now that you stole me with a kiss.
Nov 1, 2017
Nov 1, 2017 at 10:03 AM UTC
i loved how nothing ever bothered you
i loved that nothing ever mattered
until i realized that meant me too
then all my dreams were shattered
i loved how you talked so loud
i loved how you spoke the truth
until you used me for your own needs
then you stole away my youth
i loved that you smiled sweetly
i loved that you sang my name
until everything i had was gone
then i noticed your little game
Nov 6, 2016
Nov 6, 2016 at 6:42 PM UTC
**I'm not scared to **** myself
I know I'm not cause I've tried
the only scary part is failing
to live when part of you has died
I'm not afraid of dying
I know cause I've come close
taking those blades to my skin
cause they're my only hope
I'm not worried about my end
I know cause I've seen it all
jagged breaths and shaky hands
my chest will rise.. than fall.**
Sep 27, 2016
Sep 27, 2016 at 2:43 PM UTC
***I've said it in different ways
and a million different times
but no matter how I tell you
you can't believe my crimes
I'm a criminal among criminals
a murderer in the midst of thieves
a liar surrounded by players
but I've got nothing up my sleeves
I have laid it all out for you
piece by piece by piece
my misconceptions; false truths
but still you don't believe
I'm a criminal among criminals
we live each day a lie
for when it comes to tell the truth
we all would rather die***
Sep 1, 2016
Sep 1, 2016 at 12:15 PM UTC
just because my brokenness
isn't on my skin
doesn't mean that nothing's wrong
it doesn't mean I win
I see myself everyday
and wonder who I'll be
reflections, decisions, perceptions
what do people see
you read in books that people change
but really who's to say
I have always been the way I am
there is no other way
Jul 26, 2016
Jul 26, 2016 at 9:16 PM UTC
I grow tired of the way I look
and tired of the way I feel
regardless of your choices
what I felt seemed real
I gave a lot of time to you
I gave a lot of words
but everything I ever said
just always went unheard
I sang you all my love songs
and kissed away your fear
but you never reached out to me
cause you were never here
Jul 26, 2016
Jul 26, 2016 at 9:08 PM UTC
when everything was going well
and I didn't feel like ****
you somehow turned my life to hell
and walked right out of it
you made me want to trust you
you just had to make me care
you told me lies, I told a few
but you left, that's not fair
May 24, 2016
May 24, 2016 at 1:16 PM UTC