In a room sheltered by the passing of the seasons,
Trapped within the tempest of my consciousness,
A forbidden unravels between the two of us,
Like a wistful fragrance, losing itself in the winds.
You asked me to draw my reserved strength,
You sparked my dead empathy.
You spoke to my heart and asked it never to bleed and cry.
And then you left me by myself, alone in the face of my worst enemy, myself.
Today, as I sit under a naked full moon,
As its moonbeams pierce my solitary heart,
With the breeze running over my wounds,
My heart yearns to know where you are.
In order to fend those I loved,
I corrupted myself to become the one thing I hated,
The prey became the predator, lifted his sword,
Yet who can I embrace with my sword raised?
With your sweet words,
With the promise of your mischevious smile,
You lowered my arms.
You brought me back, but you left me alone.
I rest my psyche against the darkness that threatens to overcome my soul,
The fires you lit are long gone.
Sometimes, I think you were a cruel joke,
A jape by fate, to harden my glass heart.
Now, my raised sword serves no good,
A man wielding a sword, yet yielding his will to live,
Protects no one, he only kills.
All I want now is to rest in the embrace of cold death.
I do not know what I want anymore,
Perhaps you left me soul dead.
Nevertheless, i wish to forget,
I wish for your traces on my soul to be erased.
In light of sorrow, the moments of joy you left,
Pierce me harsher than barbed arrows.
Tell me.
How do I erase you from my soul?
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 7:27 AM UTC
I am sinking,
Into an obsidian pool,
Buried somewhere deep in the crevices of my mind.
Or is t something that transcends my identity,
A sliver of an entity that is so refined,
That the pool in my dreams,
Is a pale reflection of what it truly is.
As I sink into the dark waters,
The stars that shine above fade away,
As the darkness claims what should never have been,
The joyous moments we shared deluged.
I watch, impassive.
The pool of oblivion cleanses me of the taint,
That emotion smothers on all those who fall prey to it.
In the backdrop, a desolate aria snakes its way,
A song without words, lust and longing lent expression,
As it plays, I can see you, fade away,
The water purges your traces away from my soul,
And all I may do is watch you go away,
Perhaps, this is for the best.
Mortal men, caged by the demons of their past,
Should not wander to close, to divine beings like you,
Lest, like me, they burn and wither away,
In the fiery embrace of unrequited love.
For tonight however,
The pool shall remake me again.
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 7:27 AM UTC
Deicide,
The death of an entity
To the tick of a broken clock.
Solitary, in the backdrop,
A medley sounds,
Woven of solitary despair and chaos,
A song without words,
Drenched in emotions.
How am I supposed to keep up
With the pace of this feral world,
When my crutches, my love for you,
Is long gone.
Deicide,
The death of an aspect,
Of a forgotten dream.
Perhaps, this is for the best.
Our fate was merely to brush past each other,
And continue.
You, towards your ascent,
But me, my descent beckons.
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 7:26 AM UTC
At times I confess,
The follies that are part of me,
The bane of being human,
Force me to find recluse in solitude,
Away from the squabbles of mortal men,
Who fight for things immaterial,
Spurning things that they should endevour to have.
Alas, it shames me not,
That solitude at times,
Rejuvenates some hidden part of myself,
A resevoir refilled, replenished.
I spend my time alone,
Listening to the solitary wind,
Or to the beats of some bard’s song,
Uncovering meaning in both.
But I must admit there are times,
When I watch lovers entwined in a casual embrace,
Or a child’s loving gaze at his parent,
And realization strikes me.
Although I like being alone at times,
The wine of loneliness bitters my withered soul.
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 7:26 AM UTC
I stand alone under a full moon,
Trapped by the intoxicating desolation of the empty night.
I watched stars fade out and die,
Disappear into the void, consumed,
By suffering and sadness, woe and misery.
I opened my arms, let the shadows eat out my heart,
Let the oblivion fill my soul, with each breath I took.
My eyes, alas, could not shed a single tear,
They had burned out.
Yet the air around me shimmered with a haze,
A haze of pain, of silent screams and horror unexpressed.
I touch the warm embrace of fire,
Let the flames touch my defiled skin,
I watch in awe as the fire accepts what the world so desperately rejects,
Let the dancing fingers envelop my flesh,
I watch as I die,
Rotting inside and out,
I ride the Darkness,
I feast on solitude,
I thrive on the wine of loneliness.
Is it only pain that keeps me alive?
Why couldn’t you have left me,
Why did you have to interfere?
You could have let me stand underneath the full moon,
Watched me howl and drown myself in despair,
Let me unravel and fade away,
Slowly into the darkness of the night.
Why did you have to step in,
And turn around my life?
The illusion of a better tomorrow,
Is a trap that you lured me in.
The bitter poison of an emotion best caged,
Is the one that you exposed me to.
Yet even now,
As I learn to live as a shade again,
As I howl at the full moon,
I realize these are bitter rants,
On a withered soul.
A warrior is most vulnerable when he is injured,
And the one who saves his life,
He is indebted to that one.
He pledges not only his sword,
But also his soul.
Yet the saviour,
How is it any different for her?
Her task is to save, not to nurture.
May 27, 2014
May 27, 2014 at 7:26 AM UTC
Standing under the weeping sky,
Molested by the blowing breeze.
How much time must pass before the rain,
Freezes the tears flowing down my cheeks?
Each time I draw breath,
The shattered glass pierces my lungs.
This intriguing world,
Grows ever more distant
I can never say good bye to you.
Yet you never gave me the choice to.
Cut me off and erased me.
I cling on now painfully.
How much must I scream,
For my cries to pierce,
The veil of your indifferent silence?
These cries have no aim or hope.
A glimpse.
An exquisite glance at your beautiful smile.
Why won't you grace me with the divine melody,
Of your voice?
Back then I remember,
The nights I spent in the comfort of your company,
Till you decided to leave me alone,
What did I do so terribly wrong?
Mar 19, 2014
Mar 19, 2014 at 3:19 AM UTC
You made me forget,
Forget the demons I once was.
Holding you in my arms,
What will happen to me if I forget you?
Specks of stardust,
The universe expressing itself.
How is it that we fit so close,
Snuggling into each others arms?
The stars, they might be hiding from us tonight,
But I know they're watching us.
Tiny flickers of hope and joy,
The lights we are looking for in our lives.
Happiness always comes with a price.
Joy cannot be understood without sorrow.
Standing next to you seemed so natural to me,
That I can't believe that you're gone.
I have wept only as many tears as many could flood my eyes,
After that I waited for the scarlet sunrise.
Something that will continue forever from now on,
A world without you, ashen, dull and grey.
Wounds which can never be healed,
Left upon bruised skin.
Sometimes the pain is renewed when,
I hear your melodious laugh.
Happiness can only be realized when,
It ceases to exist forevermore.
I have only one wish,
To see you once again like before.
Mar 19, 2014
Mar 19, 2014 at 3:18 AM UTC
The city of my heart, one which had closed its doors long ago.
Stands with shattered ruins cloaked in the miasma of my dread.
The forges which had gone out long ago,
Have rekindled flames burning bright.
Resurrected hope flutters against the bleak backdrop,
Its wings burning bright against the smoke.
I look at you and smile.
You look at me and gaze into my soul.
Healing it.
I want to ask you to stop,
If you look into the abyss,
The abyss shall look into you.
But my protests are silenced,
Rendered mute by the touch of your lips.
You smirk, knowing the power you hold over your knave.
Slowly, your taste sets my senses on fire,
A fire which is feral.
For a brief moment I am whole again,
Yet we must part to take a breath.
You smile and hold me in your embrace,
All shall be well, you whisper in my ear.
A thousands paths lay untrodden,
What does the never ending future hold?
All I want is that we continue our journey,
Our journey towards that eternal dream.
And never truly let go.
Maybe if the Gods grace me their favor,
Maybe we'll slip into the darkness together.
On the same breath we'll leave our mortal shells.
To be one forever more.
You've opened a door in my heart,
One I didn't know was there.
I'm here on the edge again,
Don't let me go.
In the warmth of your embrace,
I know I'm finally home.
Mar 19, 2014
Mar 19, 2014 at 3:17 AM UTC
A low grumbling noise,
Awakens the poor child,
Afraid he clutches his rags,
Alone he whimpers softly,
Trying not to wake up his dad.
Abu wasn't nice, he smelled,
And Ammi called him d-r-u-n-k.
The growling grew near,
It haunted him every night.
It kept a distance,
Yet still made him shiver from fright.
Two bright suns, the eyes of a demon,
Race past him, parting the puddles,
S-p-l-a-s-h
No longer dry, he stares blankly into the dark,
Sobs and crawls back under the plastic sheet,
Crawls back into his home.
Next to his house,
Is a glitzy place.
He has seen the Gods visit the place.
Not the ones Ammi took him to meet,
But the ones who had bones and flesh.
At times they threw nibbled ambrosia at him,
He was too hungry to comprehend the word leftovers.
Yet on his final night there was no food,
There was no omen.
No comet marked the death of those forsaken by their stars.
Two eyes blinded him,
The rest broke his petite form.
A God steps out, leans over his broken form, spits,
And cleans the filth, his blood off the hood.
An elder man looms over his broken form,
His eyes displaying a nonchalant sadness.
The God turns to his slave,
"Bansilal, you were driving the car."
And then to perhaps, himself,
****** beggars, don't they have anyplace else to live?"
Mar 19, 2014
Mar 19, 2014 at 3:16 AM UTC
Tears streaked down his cheeks,
Why didn't they realize it hurt.
It started with a single word.
"Useless" and they killed him.
Days turned into months.
Yet his tormentors didn't let him go.
Angry, bitter, afraid and left alone,
Like arrows, the words began to pierce his soul.
Weak. Stupid. Idiot. ****
The voices in his head,
Were no longer his friends.
Useless filth why not end it?
Left alone, with those brutal voices.
With those horrible fears,
Alone with those terrible words,
He took to the blade.
He watched the blood leave his veins,
His skin grow cold and pale.
USELESS. USELESS. USELESS.
Carved forever on his skin.
No goodbyes, no more horror.
After having written down,
All the secrets he could spill,
Before dosing on a dozen sleeping pills.
Mar 19, 2014
Mar 19, 2014 at 3:16 AM UTC