When you're alone
And life is making you moan,
I know what you can do.
Blow me.
When you've got worries,
And your speech get's all slurry
Seems to help, I know,
Blow me.
Every time you come around you're always causing trouble.
Why can't you be nice and friendly?
More like Betty Rubble.
Vicodin.
You think that it makes you feel good.
But it just ***** your brain up.
You've misunderstood.
So just BLOW ME!
Don't be afraid to just BLOW ME!
Even Ruben Kincaid says to BLOW ME!
It's the best use of your mouth.
blow me,
BLOW ME
Don't hang around
While scratching your ***** mound,
Unless you're willing to,
Blow me.
Maybe you know
Some other places to go to
But right now you can,
Blow me.
Every time you come around you're always causing trouble.
Why can't you be nice and friendly?
More like Betty Rubble.
Vicodin.
You think that it makes you feel good.
But it just ***** your brain up.
You've misunderstood.
So just BLOW ME!
Don't be afraid to just BLOW ME!
You and your PhD need to SHOW ME!
What you can do with your mouth.
blow me,(blow me),blow me,(blow me)
Apr 10, 2015
Apr 10, 2015 at 12:59 PM UTC
I look at all the boney people.
I look at all the boney people.
Ellanor Twigby
Picks up the rice in the church where her wedding has been;
Lives in a dream.
Waits at the window,
Wearing a face that she keeps in a jar by the door.
Who is it for?
All the boney people, where do they all come from?
All the boney people, where do they all belong?
Jenny McCraigsie
Writing the words of a sermon that thick ones will fear;
Don't have a beer!.
Look at her schlocking,
Selling snake oil to lonely dysmorphic out there.
What does she care?
All the boney people, where do they all come from?
All the boney people, where do they all belong?
I look at all the boney people.
I look at all the boney people.
Ellanor Twigby
Died in the church and was buried alone with her name.
Nobody came.
Jenny McCraigsie
Counting her cash with her hands as she walks from her grave.
One less drone slave.
All the boney people, where do they all come from?
All the boney people, where do they all belong?
Apr 7, 2015
Apr 7, 2015 at 6:22 AM UTC
Shame upon those,
who gaze down their nose,
while opining sans one single fact.
Like the Church way back when,
who assumed it and then,
made it law that the Earth shall be flat.
Mar 2, 2015
Mar 2, 2015 at 4:23 AM UTC
Sung to the tune of The Lumberjack Song by Monty Python. Back-up Mounties optional.
I never wanted to be Sandra Dee!
I... I wanted to be...
A LESBIAN!
(piano vamp)
Leaping from bush to bush! As they float down the mighty rivers of
Finger and Thumbia!
With my best girl by my side!
The Blond!
The Brunette!
The Giant Snookie!
The Natural Red!
The Little Spinning Skinnamarink!
We'd sing! Sing! Sing!
Oh, I'm a lesbian, and I'm okay,
I like to broadcast that I'm gay.
Chorus: She's a lesbian, and she's okay,
She likes to broadcast that she's gay.
I see straight girls, they're not like me,
But I think that can change.
If they'd just let me kiss them.
Their lives I'd re-arrange.
Mounties: She sees straight girls, they're not like her,
But she thinks that can change.
If they'd just let her kiss them.
Their lives she'd re-arrange.
Chorus: She's a lesbian, and she's okay,
She likes to broadcast that she's gay.
I cut down guys, I wish and hope,
That others would join in.
I wish straight women would think,
that *** with men was sin.
Mounties: She cuts down guys, she wishes and hopes,
That others would join in.
She wishes straight women would think,
that *** with men was sin.
Chorus: She's a lesbian, and she's okay,
She likes to broadcast that she's gay.
Oh I'm a lesbian and I'm OKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK K!
May 1, 2014
May 1, 2014 at 10:07 PM UTC
You say yes, I say no.
You drop top,
then I say go go go, oh no.
You say get high and I say jello
jello jello
I don't know why you say get high, I say jello
jello jello
I don't know why you say get high, I say jello.
I say why, you say know.
You say why and I say I don't know, oh no.
You say get high and I say jello
(jello get high jello get high) jello jello
(jello get high) I don't know why you say get high, I say jello
(jello get high jello get high) jello jello
(jello get high) I don't know why you say get high
(jello get high) I say get high.
Why why why why why why do you say get high get high, oh no?
You say get high and I say jello
jello jello
I don't know why you say get high, I say jello
jello jello
I don't know why you say get high, I say jello.
You say yes (I say "yes") I say no (but I may mean no.)
You say stop (I can stay) and I say go go go (till it's time to go oh), oh no.
You say get high and I say jello
jello jello
I don't know why you say get high, I say jello
jello jello
I don't know why you say get high, I say get high
jello jello
I don't know why you say get high, I say jello jello.
May 1, 2014
May 1, 2014 at 9:32 PM UTC
If wishes were fishes
and fishes were dreams.
Then when you go swimming
are you who you seem?
Or do you become who you think you should be?
(If suddenly you found a home in the sea.)
And if you could do this then who would you be?
A fish who was dreaming of life water free?
Or are you content,
where ever you be?
On land or in sea,
are you always "me"?
May 1, 2014
May 1, 2014 at 9:20 PM UTC
Ohhh,Im picking out a GUlaaaag for youuuuu.
Not an ordinary GUlaaaaag,
that's truuuue.
But a gulag filled with all the things,
That you fear the most.
So learn Spanish or have no food.
That's how I'm pick-ing out a GUlaaaaag,
For you.
May 1, 2014
May 1, 2014 at 9:16 PM UTC
Elly May,
It used to be you were one click away,
But no longer so I'm bound to say,,
How much I miss you Elly May.
Suddenly,
I'm not half as fond of old TV,
There's no subtle sexuality,
Oh, Elly May where can you be.
Why'd she
Have to go I don't know, they wouldn't say.
Now there,
Is no Jed or Jethro or Elly May.
Elly May,
In the ce-ment pond you used to play,
With your private zoo in lingerie,
Oh, how I miss you Elly May.
Why'd she
Have to go I don't know, they wouldn't say.
Now there,
Is no Jed or Jethro or Elly May.
Elly May,
Love for you was all that made my day,
Now I need a place to hide away,
Oh, how I miss you Elly May.
Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm.
May 1, 2014
May 1, 2014 at 9:07 PM UTC
I met a crazy girl today.
Her eyes were shiny bright.
Her hair was gold,
Her skin was brown,
Her ***** were out of sight.
It seemed we knew each other,
Before we even met.
I was in fact so smitten,
All logic I'd forget.
We slept together quickly,
I thought I was Brad Pitt.
How sad it is I could not see,
My world would turn to ****
Because the *** was awesome,
She seemed a perfect match.
Whole sections of my brain shut down,
in deference to her ******
I thought I was the predator,
Mufasa, if I may.
Blinded by the passion,
To the fact that I was prey.
And soon there was a pregnancy,
Which caused us to be wed.
And I,the fool,believed her,
And all the vows she said.
But as you might imagine,
There was no happy end.
Because she was in fact insane.
And in a teenage bed.
So when I hear a young man speak,
The words that I once did.
I feel an obligation,
To warn this hopeful kid.
That crazy may mean good ***
And complements galore.
But the end is always tragic,
As you will be her *****
Your children will be poisoned,
Taught that you are bad.
And for this you will pay each month,
Or be a Deadbeat Dad.
May 1, 2014
May 1, 2014 at 8:56 PM UTC
The bleat goes on, the bleat goes on
Drums keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
Bein chased was once the rage, uh huh
History has turned the page, uh huh
The bacon bringing the current thing, uh huh
Justin Bieber is our newborn king, uh huh
The bleat goes on, the bleat goes on
Drums keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
It's time to stand alone on your two feet, uh huh
You might find that feeling preety sweet, uh huh
The men will like you once you do the same
Stop with all the crying and the blame
The bleat goes on, the bleat goes on
Drums keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
Grandmas sit in chairs and reminisce
Glad they'll be dead and not have to live like this
The cars keep going faster all the time
Bums still cry "hey buddy, have you got a dime"
The bleat goes on, the bleat goes on
Drums keep pounding a rhythm to the brain
La de da de de, la de da de da
Feb 16, 2014
Feb 16, 2014 at 10:58 AM UTC