i wanna be someone you don't yet know
i wanna be your promise of tomorrow
your calm of kisses before the storm
if i could be the first night girl again
i'd never let you in
i'd let you taste the sweetest parts of me
i'd only be your joy
i wanna be the first night girl
id sacrifice being whole
i'd save you from all the ugly parts
to be again your world
Aug 21, 2017
Aug 21, 2017 at 1:11 PM UTC
here you are.
at a ******* standstill.
sitting on the fence of taking leaps, or going back to sleep
breathing in all these insecurities.
it’s sick because theyre not worth a ****** thing, not a ****** thing.
cry for all the things you wont do
cry for your sick, sad world
cry for the doors you close, for the windows you wont open
suffocate yourself, discourage every spark from turning into a flame.
all the things that give you thrills are gone, and going.
******* fleeting.
look at you, left behind
alone with your crutches and your boundaries.
******* *******
Feb 13, 2012
Feb 13, 2012 at 7:17 PM UTC
by guess and by god, headstrong,
a recklessly charted course.
ruled by intuition and ammunition
we were captains together--but then the weather!
clouded our stars, washed away our vision, tore our sails.
my captain! i was desperate!
for you: i jettisoned my heart, threw overboard my sensibility,
let out all my rope until the Bitter End.
but you mean to abandon ship!
after all we've sailed through, and you mean to abandon ship.
you've left me with the devil to pay,
but instead i'll swallow the anchor, i'll swallow it whole.
forgive my mutiny,
but a dead captain is no captain, and the sea does own my soul.
Nov 21, 2011
Nov 21, 2011 at 8:13 PM UTC
good-for-nothin'
belly-aching, belly-up
collapsed into a puddle, i drip into the gutter
can't separate my colors.
past art is perverted, salt-saturated drops have made my vision run
i am the river that i cannot cross
if you won't be my stepping stone, i'll meet you down-stream.
Nov 9, 2011
Nov 9, 2011 at 9:27 PM UTC
i set you free.
if you love me fly home to me. if you need a love fly back to me.
this town is a cage, but we have the key.
Jul 28, 2011
Jul 28, 2011 at 12:43 PM UTC
self destruction lies underneath my skin.
i breed it in my bones
it boils in the marrow.
every move i make is against myself
commands from a sickened brain
it rules sadistically -- governed by anxiety
failure pays the taxes,
behold, a wealth of negativity spread throughout the rest of me.
and, what a mockery my teeth have made of me!
they only clench themselves and pretend.
because now -- salty tears.
bitter.bitter.bitter.
i drink them up, and my mouth is left dry.
it only waters my self destruction.
Jul 15, 2010
Jul 15, 2010 at 10:28 AM UTC
feel unearthed doubt
bury anxious tears
seedlings of sadness
depression blooms.
Jun 25, 2010
Jun 25, 2010 at 7:45 PM UTC
i am certain that i am
and that i am certainly ((not))
who i think i am.
but i wish i could be who i was.
then
Jun 10, 2010
Jun 10, 2010 at 12:52 AM UTC
we sat down and talked last night
beer buzzed and campy,
letting the smell of the fire penetrate
your sweatshirt (which you would lend to me)
and my hair (which you would later caress)
and we floated in our remember-when's and remember-who's.
i remember when
i remember who
me and you
when we were timid and we were shy
and the first time we met, it was with our eyes
i saw a green that stopped me in my tracks
because even at the naive age of five, i knew that it was the same green
as the onion grass in my backyard which
when spring came we always tasted
and always hated
how it lingered even after we had our apple juice and snacks
Jun 10, 2010
Jun 10, 2010 at 12:36 AM UTC
pullin' on my heart strings
feelin' like a bee sting
it was such a little thing
but the feeling was big.
Jun 9, 2010
Jun 9, 2010 at 11:29 PM UTC