Look for me
Maybe I've washed away
But I'm still here
Lost in the past
Ghost made of ash
There's always something more to see
Jul 16, 2017
Jul 16, 2017 at 1:06 PM UTC
A phoenix rises from the ashes only to return again
She has fallen under the arrows of eyes never meant to see
Her final words she whispered in my ear
**A thank you for all of the kind words
And an I'm sorry for the things left unsaid and unheard**
And then she is gone,
In a blink
They have pulled away a part of my soul
A phoenix returns to the ashes only to rise again
If you look close enough, you'll see wings sprouting from the dust
But this is the fall of Amethyst Fire
Jun 19, 2017
Jun 19, 2017 at 11:23 AM UTC
I had to write this in case I die
And they go through my accounts, find my poems
I had to make sure they know that, despite what they read
I could never **** myself
I loved you all too much, I had too many plans
It's just that, I really wanted to sometimes, you know?
I saw too much reality in life
I saw all the endless ways I could die and it scared me
And I'm sorry Mom, that I never told you any of this
It's funny that, in your own way, you knew how this was going to play out
You were always afraid I'd be like Dad, never asking for help when I needed it the most
But I was going to, I swear
I was going to fix this, as soon as I went away to school
I just couldn't have you know this side of me
I loved you too much for that
And to the people who did know this side of me
I'm sorry too
For the moment when they first break the news that
"Rachel's dead"
And you think I really did **** myself and that you couldn't save me
The taste of relief bittersweet on your tongue when they tell you how it really happened
Just know that I wanted to make the world a better place
I never thought I was enough to do that, but I was trying
Every day, I got up and stuck a smile on my face
Even when I was hurting so badly that I wanted to **** myself
I WAS STILL TRYING
So please, all I ask is
Don't console yourself by thinking I'm in a better place
Every day, no matter how much it hurt, I chose life.
And so, on the off chance that I die tomorrow, or the next day or the next, I just had to get this out there.
My choice was always life.
It was always all of you.
With all my love and the final beatings of my heart,
Rachel
Jun 16, 2017
Jun 16, 2017 at 10:34 PM UTC
I can't breathe.
It seems,
We are all just a gathering of cells
Splitting ourselves in half
And in the process, losing ourselves
Dreading the day when something finally goes wrong
With the aging of our vigilance
We finally become
Cancer.
May 29, 2017
May 29, 2017 at 10:57 AM UTC
Time cannot catch our corner of the world
Speaking words until our lips are sore
I am smiling in the core of my soul
I'll miss you
Even though we're never truly gone
We'll still be sitting in our chairs
When rose petals fall
May 28, 2017
May 28, 2017 at 12:02 AM UTC
Ask me
I dare you
Don't you care to know my heart?
When I'm gone,
Won't you wish you had?
My hand outstretched,
I will show you where mirages are born
Where rainbows- the sky's greatest lies- begin
All you have to do is just cross the river, jump the stepping stones
Never mind how slippery they may be
Don't you trust me?
Ask and you'll recieve
May 17, 2017
May 17, 2017 at 9:48 AM UTC
The darker it gets
the more the words begin to writhe
Writhe and rise
they dance before my eyes
tumbling out of my heartbeat,
the poems
Write themselves.
May 10, 2017
May 10, 2017 at 2:02 PM UTC
Dad's in the ground and
Mom's got a boyfriend.
He's as tall as Dad is short and he likes to bike and ski, two things both Mom and Dad never figured out how to do. I've only met this boyfriend once or twice but you know what?
I don't care. As long as she's happy.
They see each other in between the times Mom spends driving Sis and I around. They've been to the city, to each other's houses and towns. Mom says he talks a lot, but she laughs as she says it.
Mom thinks it's special somehow that he and Dad both had graying hair and blue eyes.
And who am I to say no?
Who am I to reduce affection to statistics and chemicals, chance and electricity?
Mom, you deserve every happy second you feel with this man. I hope you have the best of experiences and adventures ahead. I hope the love in your heart you had for Dad just keeps on giving, lighting up the night sky with the stars.
Dad's dead and
Mom's found happiness again.
The world keeps turning around and so do we.
And so do we.
May 2, 2017
May 2, 2017 at 3:58 PM UTC
You brave, brave souls
Staking your ground with your banners
Defiant, your words claim
This is my story
Who I am
And no one, and nothing will take that away from me
How I wish I could be like you.
Apr 30, 2017
Apr 30, 2017 at 9:09 PM UTC
I curl my knees, drop my head to my chest, my phone cupped carefully to my heart
Its buzz is now the lifeblood vibrating through my veins
You're still here
Apr 19, 2017
Apr 19, 2017 at 11:45 PM UTC